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N E W Y O R K STATE'S OLDEST GAY NEWSPAPER
Presidential candidates
address gay issues
As of eariy February, five Democratic and one
Republican candidates had responded to a survey
on lesbian and gs^^ issues circulated to all
presidential candidates by the National Gay &
Lesbian Iksk Fon^e (NGLTF).
Fnr thc firet timc» every Democratic candidate
has said he would sign into iaw the gay and lesbian civil rights bill now in Congress.
"This support marks a clear division between
1984 and 1988," NGLTF executive Director Jeffrey Levi said. "In *84, this very basic issue of
support for gay rights legislation was a contentious one in the Democratic primaries."
The survey asked candidates about their positions on issues including gay and lesbian civil
rights legislation, AIDS policies, women*s rights,
and emplcyment and immigration discrimination.
"We are a diverse conununity with varying
positions on the econon^ and foreign policy, for
example," Levi said. "But lesbian and gay voters
are increasingly demanding that any cartdidate
meet a threshold level of support for gay/lesbian
civil rights aiKl AIDS issues b ^ r e they receive
serious consideration. These surveys will become
the basis for eadi voter to determine whether that
threshold has been met/*
ThefoUowingbriefly sununarizes 4ie responses
of the candidttes who harve retunied surveys so
ftr. NGLTF will publish a chart summarizing the
data wben stirvcfys are received from all
candidates.
George Bush
G^/Lesbian Ovil Rights
*Dki not i^)ecificaily address question of civil
rights bill in survey re^MMise.
•Believes that "all Americans have fundamental
rishls guaiameed by the Coostitution—righls such
as freedom of religion, freedom of speech, and
the right to a trial by jury. No one group should
have special privileges granted by government.**
AIDS M k y
•No specific response on funding levels.
•Believes FDA process should not inhibit new
generation of wonder drugs.
•Opposes federally-mandated AIDS education.
Supports sex education that is "non-threatening**
and teaches traditional values and traditional
morality.
•Supports confidentiality protections for those
tested, and supports "guarantees that everyone is
treated 'feiriy.** >^buld leave details regarding
"restrictions on AIDS patients** to states.
•Supports more testing based on balancing
equities of "need for more information and
knowledge to benefit the majority versus our basic
Constitutional right to privacy.** Concludes that,
"Ultimately we must protect those who do not
have the disease.**
•Supports testing of prisoners, immigrants,
military, foreign service. Supports routine testing
of marriage license ^iplicaitts, patienis at sexually
tcansmitted disease clinics and drug clinics.
Leabteii/Gay Itaitty U m e s
•Did not provide answers to fiunily issues
questions.
Michsttl Dukakfe
Gi^/Lcsbian Chil Rigfats
•Dukakis supports passage of federal lesbian/gay
civil rights protections.
•He would not issue an executive order banning
discrimination in federal employment.
•Believes that sexual orientation in and of itself
should not be cause to deny security clearances
or to undergo extraordinary employment review.
I M Lyon, pr»sident of the Rochester Gay Men's Chorus left), presenting a donation to Dan IMeyers, an organizer of fundraisers
for Helping People with AIDS (left); Dr. William Volenti of Strong lyiemortal
Hospital (second from right); and AIDS Rochester Executh^ Director
Jackie Nudd (right). The chorus gave $1 from each ticket sold t o its holiday concert to HPA and AIDS Rochester.
AIDSFblicy
•Supports $900 million to $1.1 billion in funding
for 1988.
•Care of people with AIDS (PWAs) will ultimaiely be shared by patients, insurers, health care providers, and federal, state and local govemments.
Supports catastrophic health care plan. Supports
ahemative, cost-effective care for PWAs. Supports
federal AZT reimbursem*nt.
•Opposes HIV-antibody testing for health insurance. Mbuld allow h for individual life insuruice and not>-caiKxllabie disability insurance.
VioM prohibit insurance discrimination based on
sexual orientation.
•Supports Arline decision. Supports Federal
AIDS Policy Act. Supports federal legislation banniiig discrimination against PWAs, tlsose who test
positive for HIV antibodies or those perceived to
be either.
•Opposes mandatory testing except for blood,
sperm, and organ banks. Supports current testing
policies for military and Inunigration and
Naturalization Service testing of immigrants from
high incidence countries.
Lesbten/Gi^ Runiiy Issues
• M ^ l d not recognize domestic partner benefits
programs for govemment employees.
•Opposes changing eligibility requirements for
continued on page 8
Lesbian invisibility a probletn, activists say By Michele M O O R
fighting invisibility continues to be a challenge
for lesbiaiis working in the feminist movemem and
other political movements, several qseakers told
participants in a strategy and organizing session
on lesbtan and gay issues at Agenda *88 >Minien*s
Legislative Conference, held on Feb. 1 in Albany.
"The single thing that is most troublesome to
us is im^bility,** said Viiginia Apuzzo, New \brk
State Governor Mario Cuomo's liaison to the lesbian and gay conununity.
Apuzzo and several participants in the strategy
session criticized the feilure of the conference's
keynote speakers and workshop fiociliutors to
mention lesbians.
All of the issues discussed at the conference—
itKhiding health care, housing, aging, child care,
alternatives to welfere reform, child support, pay
equity, domestic violence, AIDS education artd
sexual harassment—affect lesbians, but organizers
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and spealcers at events like AgeiKla *88 must be
constantly remiixied of this, Apuzzo said.
**The lutfure of the of^ression is there's no day
off,** she said. **'Wc simply must decide we're iKit
going to be polite. Every time we sit back and
don*t say anything, somebody gets away with
thiikking they covered all the bases.**
Lesbians and heterosexual women, rural and
urban women, artd women of color and white
women must find a common ground aiKl work
together against discrimiruttion, Apuzzo said.
One issue that many different groups have
agreed is a "priority item** in this year's legislative
session is the passage of the bias-related crime
bill, National Organization for Women lobbyist
Mary Lou Murrock told the strategy session participants. The bill irK:reases punishmem for
violent or intimidating crimes, against people or
their property, which are pardy or fully motivated
by bias against sexual orientation, race, creed, col-
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or, nationa] origin, sex, disability or age.
This is the first time the phrase "sexual orientation** has appeared in an anti-bias bill in New
M>rk state, Murrock said.
The inclusion of sexual orientation feces a battle
in the legislature, especially in the Republi<»ncontrolled Senate, which "doesn't want to go on
record as endorsing a lifestyle,*' said Libby i\>st,
co-chair of the New \brk State Lesbian and Gay
Lobby (NYSLGL).
R>st said NYSLGL has been working with
oiganizations around the state to lobfay for the bill,
biM has seen resistance from some groups to working with gays.
Many black activists are concerned with passing the bill through the legislature,, whether or
not it contains sexual orientation wording, Apuzzo
said, and the gay and lesbian community will harve
to work hard m Iceep sexual orientation in the bill.
The introduction of the bill was motivated by
the Howard Beach incident, in which a black man
was hit by a car and lulled after being chased onto a highway in Queens by a group of white
youths, and the assault of Ifawana Brawley, a black
16-year'Old who was found semiconscious in a
plastic bag with feces on her body and racial slurs
scrawled o r her chest in late November, 1987.
Brawley says she was abducted and sexually
assaulted by six white men.
"There must be an outcry from dte giQr and lesbian community,** Apuzzo said. "If a bill comes
up that doesn't include sexual orientation, (Gov.
Cuomo) must hear about it.**
Murrock discussed the gay and lesbian civil
rights bills, one in each house of the stale
legtslatuie, tliat oudaw discriminMfoo agunst gays
in housing and real estaie, and the onuiibus bills,
whkh cower discrinunation in a rinsB of areas iiichiding empkytnent, hotising and credh.
She also memioned health care proxy l^islation, still in the draft stage, that would allow people to choose any competem adult to make health
care decisions for them if they were imable to do
so themselves. The proposed bill ^Vioesn't have
heterosexual bias,** Miurock said, because it
doesn*t mention marital status IKM- specify who
may be chosen as a health care proxy.
The AIDS epidemic now dominates the heahh
care discussion, and the emire agenda, in the gay
and lesbian community, Apuzso said. Although
sbe doesn't deny the uigency of the AIDS crisis,
Apuzzo said an adequate study must be done of
lesbians* health care concerns.
*'I think today, in 1988, the health care industry
doesn*t know any more about us than it did 50
years ago," she said.
A session partictpam who had done health care
survQrs at a natioiud women's music festival said
the lesbian conununity is one ofthe most underinsured in the country, and that lesbians, partly as
a result of having to be closeted on tiie job, suffer more occupational stress than tlie general
population of women.
Lesbians must also fight sexism and racism
within the g ^ rights movement, which is nm by
white males, the three spealxrs said.
"Mai^ |>eople think ofthe giy rig^ movemem
as men,** !V>st said, ' i t ' s very importam Ibr us
as ^i^>men in pc^itics, in a pul>lic political context, to stand i;^ and be coumed.'*
Post said it*s inqtonam for lesbians to remain
in gay organizations dkwninatfd by men in to educate those who are sexist and racist. But
afier she leaves NYSLGL, she said, she wouki
like to put together a group of {esbians wlio have
experience in the fiekl of public polky to devekjp
a lesbian agenda.
. V
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March 1, 1988
EMPTY CLOSET
EMPTY CLOSET
^X7
March 1, 1988
Editorial
When the staff and I began to work on this
inonth*s Etnpty Closet^ I had visions of creating
the definitive issue on lesbian and gay parents.
It took me a few weeks to realize that this was
impossible. What I expect now, and what I hope
for every month, is that this EC issue will inspire
a dialogue in the conmiunity.
Should g ^ men and lesbians have children?
Why? Why not? What joys and problems come
with having children via artificial insemination,
heterosexual marriage, or adoption? How do we
come out to our children?
How do we teach children to be nonhom*opiiobic, non-sexist and non-r^ist? Is this impossible in our American society? How much of
an impact will gays raising kids have on the
culture? Are gays redefining "family'7
Are children included in the lesbian and gay
community? Will Rochester soon see the lesbian
baby boom that other cities have had in the past
several years? What are the rdes of non-biological
parents? Who does child care in the commimity?
Who gets custody c i children after a heterosexual marriage ends, and when gay or lesbian
couples split?
These are important questions, and only a few
of them have been addressed in this issue of the
EC. We'd like to hear your answers. Many readers
have been using the letters to the editor section
lately to tell their concerns to the community.
That's good, but an open forum would be even
better.
Write and tell us how you feel about parenting,
or any other subject. Q m t a few readers have
comfriained about the lack of coverage of women's
issues in the paper^ and they're right—most
months, we publish more ess2^ written by men
than by women. One way to remedy that is for
women to write opinion pieces for an open forum
section.
Rumor has it that a reader is writii^ a letter
about racism in the gay community for the April
issue. We*d like to hear more opinions on the subject. This paper belongs to a diverse and
fescinating community—let's hear some voices
from that community.
At a conference on state legislation important
to wvHnen, held in Albany at the beginning of
February, several lesbian activists emphasized the
importance of passing the anti-bias violence bill
now in the legislature. Much lobbying needs to
be done to f^ss the bill, w^hich increases penalties
for crimes motivated by prejudice against sexual
orientation, race, color, national origin, sex,
disability or .age.
It is especially urgent that coalition work be
done on this bill. It is the first such legislation
in New \brk state to include sexual orientation.
bm the activists who spoke in Albany warned that
the legislature, especially the Republicandominated Senate, doesn*t want to go on record
as "endorsing a lifestyle,** and the sexual orientation wordir^ will be die first to go if the bill
is altered. Gay men and lesbians must work with
other minorities to get the legislation passed.
In Rochester, the fust coalition meeting, sponsored by the local chapter of the Ainerican Civil
Liberties Union, will be heM on Thursday, March
3 at noon p.m. at Third Presbyterian Church, at
the comer oi East Avenue and Meigs Street.
Spend your lunch hour learning to lobby for the
bill. As Virginia Apuzzo, the governor's liason
to the lesbian and g ^ community, saki, if vsc can't
stop our bodies fiom being assaulted on the
streets, how can we work on other issues important to us?
Letters
Paul Simon
supports
gay rights
l b tlie Editor:
In Bnul Simon I see a Harry Truman Democrat
identified with the comrrion person and I hear a
John Kennedy Democrat with compassion and vision for a great nation of concerned people.
In the early 1980s when Sen. Piul Simon voted
for the McDonald Amendments I was alarmed.
Those votes were called to his attention and he
cominued his education and became sensitized on
gay and lesbian issues. "Over the last K) years
I have studied, learned and grown on issues concerning gay and lesbian discrimination.'* said
Senator Paul Simon.
When thc Helms Amendment recently passed
94 to 2 (Moynihan and Weiker voting against),
Paul Simon on the campaign trail denotmced his
senate colleagues* ill-considered vote to restrict
AIDS education efforts saying, "Accurate information is essential to enable every American to
make responsible choices in avoiding risk.** He
called for an annual federal AIDS budget of $2
billion by the year 1990 (half fix research and half
for a public health/prevention program including
massive education). He said, **lb stop the spread
of AIDS, and I t)elieve wc will, we must educate,
nm discriminate; we must provide treatmem, nm
instill fear; and we must actively pursue scientific researeh and public health eforts. We can do
all of this without resorting to police state
tnethods."
On immigration he has called foran end to the
sexual oriemation exclusion in V.S. immigration
laws.
On federal hiring he has pledged that he will
sign an executive order baiining discrimination
based on sexual orientation in federal hiring.
On ttloption and Ibsler care he says, "Decisions
concerning parenting rights should bt based on
the quality CNT care and love provided to the child,
a decision which needs to be made on a case-bycase basis. Wherever the child can best be served, that*s where the child should be, includii^
if that*s with a lesbian or ff^ couple or parem.**
Ihe Em
I think Paul Simon can win and I think he can
rally the American people to be a greater people
with real concem for each other.
Jaines R. lile
Gay Picnic to have
alcohol-free
shelter
l b the Editor:
Having oiganized thc Oay Picnic for a few years
now, I often get comments about the picnic.
Recently at a party a woman told me sadly that
she had never been to the picnic and would nm
come. She went on to say that she was/is an
alcoholic. This seemed to be one brave voice tlut
echoed many.
The Oay Picnic held in July is a celebration for
the whole gay conununity. l b encourage and support each other in tangible collective ways is Importam. Within the commimity, we have a tremendous diversity of lifestyles, attitudes and expectations which we need to recognize and affinn.
This year, in order to express our desire to be inclusive and welcoming of all, we will designate
one of the four shelters as an alcohol-free siMter.
Each member of our community needs to be
helped to be comfortable with themselves and
with each other. Ws need to accept, support and
celebrate our diversity in ttie midst of one «C tfte
greatest expressions of our unity, the Gay flcnic.
1 hope to see all of you at the picnic. The iitfportam thii^ is to come, have a good time and €ii9oy
ttie sun and each other's company.
See you there—July 17, 198a
Cliic Paiiter
Organization offers
help to imprisoned
lesbians and gays
support group which we recentiy started, fve also
enclosed our brochure for Families of Incarcerated: Support and Services, which is a project of Rochester Interfeith Jail Ministry.
My reason for including all ofthis is lo let you
and others connected with the Gay Alliance of
Genesee Valley know that we do have outreach
to g ^ and lesbian persons in Monroe County Jail
and die New ^ r k state correctional system. I have
good lines of communication with the jail administration and counseling staff, who c^^en look
to us for resources in the g2c^ and lesbian community to help address the needs of gay men and
lesbian women who sometimes are incarcerated
locally. I also try to be <^ resource lo gay and lesbian persons, their femilies and friends who are
trying to deal with ttie correctional system of this
state and to be of assistance to those persons who
wish to come back imo our community wtio occasionally liave special needs that tiave to be
addressed.
I have always been very appreciative of the
ediK»ikxial arid iiiformative qualkies of the £>rV'rv
Closet and of the service that it provides to ttie
gay community of Itochester. If I can ever be of
help to the GAGV and the Entfoy Closet, please
do nm tiesitate to call me.
R. Bruce Colburn, Project Dbvctor
Editor's rune: Families cf Incarcerated: Support atid Services is a service qf Rochester Interfitith Jail Ministry that helps fimiilies deal with
the problems cf having a loved one in jail or
prison. The group offers resources; ir^rmation
on ItHxd, state tmd federal correctional fitcilities:
referrals to other agencies; and the Families
Anonymous Support Team (FAST), which offers a
confidential sttpport grot^ that meets on Mondays from 2 to 3:30 p.m. at the Gift Center, 530
Joseph Ave.
Fbr infortnation, call 232-5148 or 454-3683.
Supplies needed
in Nicaraguan
sister city
l b tlie Editor:
The Metro-Act Ciudad Hermana T^k I^rce
would like to appeal to your readers to contributb
to our school supply drive for the children c^ El
Sauce, our sister city in Nicaragua. During die
past eigtit years of Contra war and trade emiiaigo,
thc people of Nicaragua have suffered in ways we
can only begin to imagine. Ttie children are
among those who tiave suffered ttie most; for one
thing they are unable to obtain l»sic classroom
supplies.
Ttie Metro-Act delegation wtiich just returned
from Nicaragua tias brought an amended wish list
from El Sauce. We are urgendy in need of die
following: art supplies, puzzles, tape recorders,
masks and costumes, q)orts equipmem (baseballs,
bats, mitts, jump ropes, etc.), carpentry equipmem, i^gricultural equipmem (for studem fermers
Is AMlleble at...
AIDS Roeheeter, Inc., Airttiony'e 522, Amnue Pub,
Bactielor Fbrum, Chatterly's, Friar's III, Qay AlHance Lounge, Qenesee
Co-Op LoMyy, Qoodman Realty. Ulieity, Mama Ihecone's, Partdelsli,
Paula Qffocery, Roman Sauna, Roalii'a, Sllkwood Books, Ihra, UntvacMy of
Rocttester,.VIHage Green Bookstore, Wdrtdwide News.
l b the Editor:
Enclosed are two announcements for our new
Qoset
Yes, I want to D Subscribe!
D Renew!
In a pk3in brown envetope, pleose serKi nne a OOB year, eleven issue subscdptton of
the Empty Ooset to Ihe name arxl oddress bek>w. Erx^kssed is a $8 check or rrxx^ey
order (SIO for outside the USA).
Name .
Address
Return to:
E.C. Pr»ss, 713 Monroe Avenue, Rochester, NY 14607
An Ernpty Closet yenr ooml>inen Dacember and January in one iMtin.
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The Bmpty Closer is the official publication of the
Gay Alliance of Genesee ^lley, Inc. as stated in the
by-laws of that organization. Its purpoae is U> inform
the Rochester gay community about local and national gay-related news and events; to provide a
foram for ideas a«)d creative work from thc local gay
community: to help promoce leadership in the commuiiity: and to be a part of a national network of lesbten aikd gay publications tbat eKbange ideas and
seek to educate.
Hn of our purpofe is to maintain a middle position with respect to Ihe entire commtmity. We must
be careful to present all viewpoints in a wray that
takes into cocuideratkm the views of all—women,
men, those of color, young and old. anc* those from
VBTIOUS walks of life.
Crow should
get off his butt
and help EC
l b the Editor:
As one of the many dedicated and happily overworked volunteer contributors to the Empty
Closet, I have an addition to the ongoing saga that
is Henry Crow's opinion. Mr. Crow, if you admit that we do the best with what we have and
yet we should do better, how do you propose wc
do it?
I have a radical suggestion—if Mr. Crow or
anyone else is interested in being better
represented or stimulated by our fine newspaper,
the best v/ay I can suggest is that he or she get
off their complacent, well-adjusted butts and
I^^^^^^^^^^^^'*-^'^^^''^'*-^'*'*^'-^^'^^^'^^^^*''^'*'^^*^*^^^^^^^^^^^^^^*'*"^^'*
The Empty Closet
needs you!
Call 244-9030 to volunteer
J-^^^^',.^^.^.^^.m^^.'^m^^^m.m.'^^.^.'s.9mL•^^9.'m.^•«m^^^n^m^m.m.m^^^m.m^m.^^^^.m.n.^'t.m.^.^.^^^9.'L^
YET MORE LIGHT. ..
Presbyterians for Lesbian/Gay Concerns
of the Genesee Valley
MEETINGS- Ist Thursday e a c h m o n t h
Potluck a t 6:30 Business m t g . after
C o n t a c t : Pat M o r a n
244-8963
continued on pag6 3
The Empty Closet
The Empty Closet U publhhed eleven times i ytat
(December and Jamiary combined) by the Empty Clotel
Preu fbr the Giy All ince oTOcneaee ^WIey. Inc. AppttnimMely 3500 copies of each issue are dittrifauied during
the fint week of the month by mail in a pUin scaled
envelope. TKe pnbticatioa of the name or photograph of
any person or offanizalion in anicles or advertising it not
an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation
of that peraon or the membefA of that organization.
For publication, submit news items, letters, stories,
poetry and art by mail or tn person to the Bmpty Ooaet
office by the 17th of the month. Design services for
maierial not camera-ready are available for an additional fee.
Por further information, please write to Empty
Cloaet Press, 713 Monroe Ave., Rochester, NY 14607,
or call (7l6>2M-9030.
and ganleneis) and Coleman lanterns (and parts).
Wp have already received many generous donations, including 12 cartons of paper, a $200 gift
certificate from Bourne's and K>9 classroom
chairs. Our thanlcs to all past and future con^
tributors. For fiiftii^ informatioa, and to schedule
l»ck-ups, call Metfo-Act at 325-2560 or me at
(315)483-9656. Our deadline is March 7.
Susan lonlaB
volunteer] Make specific suggestions for stories
or inform us of events or people that need to be
profiled—we can*t be everywhere to see and hear
aboiit everything that's going on, so let us know!
Also, there are other ways to make a contribution if you are not able or willing to actually write
a story of interest to you—show up for the layout
or mailing to alleviate some of the burden frcmi
those who do. If our writers did no* have to paste
up and address and mail out each and every issue,
they would have more time and eneigy to devote
to either more interesting stories or getting more
in-depth and intellectually stimulatii^ with the
stories we cover
Or, if you are both short on time and energy,
open up your wallet on a regular basis so that our
editor could afford to be full-time! It*s amazing
what having the time and eneigy to concentrate
on being creative can do for a paper's ability to
be "stimulating and challenging." The solution
to your dilemma, Mr. Crow, begins with you and
your resources.
I must say I am puzzled by people who are interested and involved enough to write in asking
to be better-represented and stimulated, but are
not willing to either be s{>eciflc about what that
means to him/her, or willing to actually become
involved in the process. It sounds to me, Mr.
Crow, that the foct that you felt strongly enough
about our "political" and "^activist" leanings that
you were willing to write in on morc t h ^ one
occasion about it, suggests that we have indeed
challenged and stimulated you, though maybe not
on the level you were willing to be affected.
Advertising PoUcy: The Empty Closer does not
print advertisem*nu that contain nude drawings or
photographs, nor does it print advertising that suggesU that the person pictured in the ad is for sale or
thaf you will "get" that particular person if you
patronise the establishment advertised.
Advertisem*nts that are explicitly sexist, racist or
ageist will be refused: advertisem*nts from organizations or buunesses that are sexist, racist, ageist or
antigy will also be refused.
Roman Catholics - Episcopalians
Other Gay Christians
Join Us!
D i g n i t y - I n t c g r i t y / R o c h c s t e r is a n e c u m e n i c a l organization o p e n to
e v e r y o n e w h o w i s h e s t o w o r s h i p in a p l e a s a n t , n o n - t h r e a t e n i n g
a t m o s p h e r e . W e invite you to join u s for o u r weekly c e l e b r a t i o n of
t h e E u c h a r i s t , followed b y a social h o u r , or o n e of o u r m a n y special
e v e n t s s u c h a s a pot luck s u p p e r , picnic, r e t r e a t , e t c . A R o m a n
Catholic m a s s is c e l e b r a t e d e a c h S u n d a y of t h c m o n t h , e x c e p t for
t h e fourth S u n d a y w h e n m a s s is c e l e b r a t e d in t h e Episcopal
tradition.
PastomI and Paer Counseling is also available
Sunday Schedule
Liturgy-5:00p.m.
Social Hour-6:00 p^m.
St. L u k e ' s E p i s c o p a l C h u r c h
17 S. F i t z h u g h St.
( b e t w e e n M a i n S t . & B r o a d St.)
The opinSons of ooliimnists and other contributing writers nte their own and do not
necessarily reflect thc collective attitude of thc
G^yAUIancc of Geneaee Vblley or the Bmpty
Editor
Michele Moof«
Associate Editor.
Sttc Cowell
Buainesa Manaier:
SteplMuile Smith
SecfCtary:
Sobyn Fiech
GtnplUct:
lypcacttli^
Downtowner Pnblkatloas
Phone 328-9758
dignity-integrity >H rochester
MB
:=£
The reality of gayness in our time is that merely
to be gay is to be "anti-society" (as the few who
are in power define it) and therefore political.
When we covet new laws that are anti-gay or reactions in society that are hom*ophobic or even activists and activism, we are representing you
because being gay is a part of your life that is a
strong enough part for other people to s ^ **you
do not deserve respect or dignity or basic human
rights." However much Mr. Crow feels that he
is well-adjusted, in that his gayness does not have
an impact on his life, the reality is that it has a
mighty impact on those who are in chaige of his
role in society and his rights as a human being
in that society. This is not a "gs^" thing, it is a
human thing.
When I read our paper (and it is our paper),
I am angered and sacldened and joyful and proud, because it speaks to me about the jcys and
pains and sorrows and pride in not only being gay
in Rochesier and the U.S. and the world, but also
in being human, and that's one more thii^ that
we all have in common. What else is its purpose
as a gay newspaper? Works for me. Crow.
Deborah Neills
Gerhard in his January letter to the editor, is in
my opinion what good writing is all about: there
wasn't anythii^ superfluous about bis letter.
Also, I was t a u ^ t that the tone in a piece of
writing is indicative of the author's attitude.
Crow protests too mudi in his second letier and
thus he admits defeat by having to re-cxplain
himself.
But sadly, Gerhard has the penuldmate word:
"Beii^ gay is not acceptable... no matter how
we 'straighten iq>* our act."
The countless examples of racism and sexism
that have been in the news the past year clearly
attest to his point and the final word has yet to
be spoken, for racism and sexism are here to staQr.
Michael H. Pierce
BULLETIN
BOARD
Crow's letter
' 'off-putting
and sexist"
-
T
Threshold Center for Alternative Youth Services is providing confidential AIDS testing for
12 to 25-year-olds at the center, located at 115
South Clinton Ave., across from Xerox Square
downtown.
Hours are: Monday-Wednesday, H):30 a.m.-8
p.m.; Thursday, 10:30 a.m.-5 p.m.; and Friday,
1-5 p.m. Fees are charged on a sliding scale, but
no one wiU be denied service if unable to pay.
Call 454-7530 for an appointment.
To the Editor:
I found Henry Crow's second letter off-putting
and sexist. No one attacked him personally, for
those of us who responded to his letter hadn't him
in front of us but we did have his words, and 1
resent his inaccurate implication.
But notice the tone of his second letter, in thc
first paragraph. You would be surprised, at the
volume of literature and writing that exists, much
of which is filled with sarcastic, witty condenscension, and written by straight persons.
A good, defensive response, clear of thought
and devoid of superfluous comment, like, for example, several of the thoughts expressed by Jim
Gay and Lesbian Parenting Coalition of Central Ohio is sopnsoring a conference, 'Celebrating
a Decade of Gay P&rcming," June 3-5 in Columbus, Ohio. For information, check the library at
the Gay Alliance of Genesee Vkliey, 713 Monroe
Ave., or write GLPC of Central Ohio, PO Box
13179. Columbus, OH 43213.
\
Gays C a n
Be C h r i s t i a n s !
Open Arms Metropolitan
Community Church
INVITES YOU
Sunday 6:00 pm
Social time after service
243 Rosedale
(comer Monroe)
Reverend Cathy Elliott
271-8478
A Gay Positive Churcii
For All People
Gay
& Lesbian
Mormons
Saturday,
March 26:
Field trip
to Palmyra
Call for Details:
254-7200 — 442-3519
\
SEVENTH-DAV
ADVENTISTS
Gay is OK! SDA Kinship
International. Inc., since 1976,
is a support group of several
hundred gay/lesbian
Adventists, present and
former, in local chapters
nationwide. Ask for brochure.
PO Box 3840-L, LA. CA 90078
Telephone:
Voice (213) 876-2076
TDD (408) 866-0159
NAYIM
A Group far Jewish Gays
and Lesbians
Meetir^ Second Sunday Every
Month at the GAGV Lounge
Contact Beth Bhom
647-3594
i
•
-
»
-
4
EMPTY CLX>SET
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Local News
Gays and Christians debate at RIT
Women^s Day
By Mfchele M o o n
This year's local Intemationai Women's Di^
celebration will include a talk fay a Mack Soudi
African wcxnan living in exile in Rochesier, a lunchtime conceit t^r die Rochesier AMxnen's Chorus,
evening performances by deaf poet Debbie Rennie and musicians Casselberry-Dupree and Uieir
band, and a day c^ workshops on a variety of
issues.
This year's theme, *'Claim our history, forge
the future," was chosen to call attention to
women's accomplishments throughout history as
well as address present and future issues that concern women. "It's idea of 'you need to know
where you come from in order to know where
you're goii^,'" said Maria Scipfone, and organizer
ofthe event.
The organizers of last year's celebnatkMi thought
the day felt ''fragmented,** Scipione said, so this
year organizers chose a dieme and have planned
a closing session for discussion, reviewing thc
workshops and networking.
Workshop topics include womra oi color and
feminism, self perception and body image, older
women, spirituality, high school women and
feminism, occupational health issues, women and
AIDS, self defense, and issues for differendyabled women.
The evems, which will be held on March 12
at die YWCA, 175 North Ointon Ave., will begin
with a talk by ZoZo Laird, who has been involved in ami-apartheid activities during the 17 years
she has lived in Rochester.
The evening entertainment will include a concert by nationally-known musicians J. Casselberry
and Jaque DuPree, with Ibshi Reagon on bass and
Annette A. Aguilar on percussion. The group
combines r^gae, blues, folk, gospel, country,
Latin and soul with strong political lyrics. Their
second record. City Down, won an award for best
n^gae album of 1986 from the National Association of Independent Record Distributors.
Tickets are $10-$15 ($20 sponsor level) and are
Activist runs in D.C
Former Rochester gay activist Bob Dardano has
GACJV, where he served as an at-large member
announced his candidacy for a seat on the District
of the board of directors for a year, and of the
of Columbia Democratic State Comminee.
Rochester Lesbian and G ^ Bolitical Caucus.
Dardano and other members of the Gennide
He was a member of GA(3V's speakers* bureau
Stein I>emocratic Club (GSDC), W^hington,
and also did speaking engagements for the
D.C.'s gay and lesbian Democratic club, are runRochester chapter of I^rents and Friends of Lesning as a slate in the May 3 election. Their goal
bians and Gays. In 1983 and 1984 Dardano lobis to see the election of as many openly gay and
bied the Rochester City Council and the Monroe
lesbian people possible to the TD-member D.C.
County Legislature for passage of civil rights
Democratic State Committee, with some GSDC
legislation.
members running at-large and others running for
Dardano also served as chairman of the 26th
ward (district) seats. Dardano is running to repreLegislative District Democratic Committee, and
sent V/sitd 6 (Capitol Hill), and if elected would
worked as subscription manager and a reporter
serve a four-year term of office.
and columnist for the Empty Closet.
Whiie in Rochester, Dardano served as field
In Washington, D.C, Dardano is chairman of
director of Tim Mains* 1985 cstmpaign for City
GSDC*s elections committee, and chainnan of the
Council. In 1984 he received the Vinnie Cup
speakers' bureau ofthe Gay and Lesbian Activists
award from the Gay Alliance of Genesee Valley
Alliance of Washington, D.C.
(GAGV). Dardano was an active member of the
avaiiabfe at Jazzberry's. 713 Monroe Ave.; Reconl
Archive, 1394 Mt. Hope Ave.; and Silkwood
Books, 633 Monroe Ave. The concert, and a performance by deaf poet Debbie Rennie, b ^ i n at
8 p.m. at die YWCA.
The workshops are free, but advance registration is recommended. Child care is available for
all events. The YWCA is accessibfe to the
differenUy-abled, and evems will be sign language
interpreted. A vegetarian lunch, catered by Jazzberry's, will be available, and brown bag lunches
are welcome.
The celebration is sponsored by a coalition of
local groups.
For more information on the day's events, call
Metro-Act at 325-256a
The International W>men's Day schedule:
9:30-10 a.iii.: Gathering and registration.
10-11 a.m.: Keynote address fay ZoZo Laird.
11:15 a.m.-12:4i5 p.m.: 1st workshop session:
"W^men of Color and the Feminist Movement,
by Barbaia St. John; ''Feminism in High School,
By and for Ybung Women," to discuss issues and
situations that hit us in the high school years, by
l i r a Yellin & Sonia Worcel; "Older Wbmen: Do
we need political solutions to common problems?
If so, can we find Uiem?" with panel moderator
Cindy Sangree; "Women and AIDS," by Sue
Cowell, RN-MSN, vice chair of Rochester Area
Ti^k Force on AIDS and chief of Health Education Unit. University Health Service, University
of Rochester; and "Issues for Diflerendy-Abled
Wbmen in Rochester," widi panel moderator Betty
Morton, director o€ TRIADD (To Reach and Inform About Development Disabilities).
M:30 p-m.: Lunch.
By Martin Hiniga
of Wbmen's Bodies," feminist concerns In our
schools; presentation, discusskm, experiential, by
Meredith Reiniger, Rosemaiy McCarthy, F^ula
Salvio and Aim MacBim^r; "Wbmen's Spiritual
Joumey," by Rev. Judith Cressy; "Occupational
Healdi Issues." by Angda D ^ t o , heahh & safety specialist of PuWic Employees federation
A F L / a O (sponsored by Rochester Council for
Occupational Safety & Healdi and Coalition of
Labor Union Wsinen); and "Self Defense for
W)men: Theory and Practice;'by Karen Kirchdf
(woinen only).
3:45-5 |»,ni.: Plenary: Reviews, discussion,
linkages and anticipation.
VIDEO
REMTALS
MMRnnsHipni
1:30-1:50 |i.in.: Music by Rochester Wbmen's
Chorus.
2-3:30 pwm.: 2nd workshop session:
"Women and Class," by Maria Scipione, MetroAct, and Janet Zandy, Monroe Community College; "Mirror. Mirror: The Curriculum of Self
Berccption" and "Playing House: The Education
6 3 3 M o n r o e Ave*
(1 block west of Oxford)
473-8110
INTER
NMIONAL
WOMEN'S
DAY
David A. B i s c h o p i n g
CONTRACTOR
Older Home Specialist
Design • Drywall • Painting
Carpentry • Decks
Roofing & Gutters
Additions
Ron and Joatuv Highly of LIFE ministries in
Manhattan came well-prepared to debate the
hom*osexual issue at the Feb. 16 joint meeting of
Gays, Lesbians and Friends Student Ofganization
(GLFSO) and the Intervarsity Christian
Felfowship at RIT.
But t h ^ soon found their strategy deflated by
die refusal of the Rev. Wdter Szymanski and
Harlow Russell to debate. Instead Szymanski and
Russell, representatives of Dignity/Integrity, the
loosi group for gi^ and lesbian CathoUcs and
Episcopalians, related their personal experiences
as Christian gay men.
The Highleys, leaders of a sexual orientation
change movement, admitted that hom*osexual
orientations are either innate or are fonned early
in childhood, but they claimed diat a change in
orientation is possible. They based their belief on
the ffiblk»l promise that Christians who give their
lives to Jesus Christ become "new men."
Joann Highley related her experience 'iiving
as a lesbian for 10 years" to the audience of about
250 people. Joann claimed that during those years,
while studying at a BiMe college, her orientation
By Michele Moore
^^lence in lesbian and gay relatfonships is difficult to discuss publicly because many gay
leaders are afraid heterosexual society wil] see gay
relationships as unhealthy, Clair I^ker, a
member-at-latge of the Gay Alliance of Genesee
VEdley board of directors, said at tbe conference
"Violence in Relationships" on Feb. 5.
In a workshop on violence in gay and lesbian
relationships, Parker, who is also a case manager
at Alternatives for Battered Wmien, reminded the
audience of about 25 people that gay relationships
are not inherendy unhealthy, and that the same
potential for violence exists in both gay and
heterosexual unions.
"Gay relationships have thc same prospects of
W^'
Ongoing Lesbian Support (Sroup - please call if interested
Ruth M . Williams, M.S. Ed.
COUNSELOR
Offers:
Individualized Counseling • Couples
Consulting • Group Facilitation
Proficient in Sign Language — Adjustable
Fee
: • <»:
Michele Ibfany
Ed.D. N.C.C.
12
Offers: Individual • Couple
Family • Group Counseling
to persons living a gay,
lesbian or bisexual lifestyle
1 9 8 8
a day of workshops for and about women
9:30am-5:00pnn FREE ADMISSION child care ovolloble
SaUjtck3y,Motchl2.1988 YWCA, 175N c*nton Avenue
CASSELBERRY-DUPREE
• Residential & Commercial
• FREE Estimates
• Fully Insured
Man92i43N
[ omcsimtui
being healthy or dysfunctional as heterosexual
relationships," she said.
The conference, for social workers and other
prcrfessicMials working in high schools, colleges
and community groups, was sponsored by the
Committee on Student Relationship Violence at
State University College ai Brockport, Alternatives for Battered Women and the Men's Education for Non-Vfolence Workshop of Genesee Mental Healdi Center.
When battering does oocur in gay relationships,
I^rker said, it is seen by heterosexual society and
by some gays as "double deviance."
Sometimes friends and relatives blame the battered partner when tiiey discover there has been
abuse in a relationship, and this yictim-blaming
ADJUSIABLE FEES
458-0533
with ToshI Reagon a n d Annelte A. Aguilar
8:00pm $10-$15 sliding scale $20 sponsor
level
Saturday. March 12.1988 YWCA
Auditorium
i
WELLESLEY
CEINTER
442-2986
individual, family, couple and
group counseling for
gay, lesbian and bisexual
persons in alternative
lifestyles
See article on this page for details.
.
violent relationship;* she said. "If your partner
who's harassing you is calling up (the workplace)
and you're not out at work, you can lose your job."
Rirker said it's impossible to tell hew many lesbians and gay men have lost jobs this way, because
so many people are closeted.
The AIDS epidemic has put great pressure on
gay male relationships, she sakl. "There's almost
an assumption that if you're giQ< you either have
AIDS or you're going to get AIDS," l^uicer said.
**Maiiy men now equate sex with death," she
sakl, and they are either opting for cetibacy or
denying the dangers of the crisis and using unsale sexual practices.
Many lesbian and gay relationships aiso lack
the fiunily suppon systems thia heterosexual partners take for granted, Rulcer said.
**The assumptions heterosexual couples make
despite accusations leveled at them during the
questfon-and-answer period. Neidier group was
willing to change its statements, but both 1 ^
satisfied that their messages had been heard.
''Everyone who came to the meting iqipeared to
have a positfon on the topic when t h ^ arrived,
and seem to have lef% with die same convictfons,"
a heterosexual GLFSO supporter said.
After the meetii^, members of both groups and
their supporters confronted the debaieis on stands
they had taken, some demanding to know the
answers to doctrinal questiom.
One fundamemalist Christian asked Szymanski if he coukln*t read "what any eighth grader
could understand" in her Bible. Doesn't the Bible cleariy teach that hom*osexuality was wrong?,
she demanded. Szymanski remained calm, and
the woman refused to hear his answer and
stomped aw^.
Afker an offer of literature, the LIFE ministries
team and their entourage of about 45 people
departed. GLFSO members noted that many audience inembers wtio claimed they supported the
Christian felfowship regularly visit local gay bars
and even attend GLFSO meetings.
174
are not made for gay coupies," she said. Holidays
can be particulariy difTicult for gay couples
because gay partners are not always included in
get-togethers with each other's exti^ided femilies,
while heterosexuals' spouses or lovers are.
Ending a gay or lesbian relationship may be
more difficult, Parker said, because the partners
have no role models. The ex-lovers may be extremely angry, but have no societally sanctioned
outlet for their feelings.
"One of the things you get in a heterosexual
relatfonship is *Damn you. talk to my attorney.'"
she said. "There are none of these kinds of outlets.
no legal redress" for gays who are splittirig up.
I^rker told professior^s in the audience ihatt
ti:^ can help by becoming faxniliar and comfortable widi gays and gay issues, or by finding other
professionals tn thetr field who are comfoitable
and can be used for referrals. She recommended
that they work with groups such as GAGV and
Rochester Association of G ^ and Lesbian Menu l Health Professionals to leam more about gay
issues.
Lesbians and gay men can go to criminal court
10 obtain an order of protection if their partners
are abusive, but the decision to use the court
sysiem "is tantamotint to saying T m coming out,***
Buicer saki.
One workshop participant who works within the
criminal justice system said many gays who go
to court must deal with extreme hom*ophobia, and
she advocated that gays not use the court siystem
in domestic violence cases.
"What the courts were doii^ with rape victims
20 years ago, di^'re doing to gays now," she said.
IfKfoor n a i n e r s
Cmss Countiy Sfcis
Use any 10-speed bicycle
Easy to store and install
Choose from
• Racermate
• Blackbum
• Minoura
Rentals and sales
• Touring • Racing
• Recreation
Complete package rentals
Special weekend rates
BartMMra Debes, M.S., CA.S.
Martha Howden. A.C.8.W., CA.C.
Horace Lethbridge, M.A.,
Director
Kathleen ¥»rnam, A.&S.W.
TIMOTHY SCHAPP, M.S. Ed., NCC
Nationally Certified Counselor offers individual
couples and group counseling and support
Call 244-1406 or 325-4090
MEDICAL ARTS PSYCHOTHERAPY ASSOC.
all events are Interpreted for ttie tiearing Impaired
and orewheelcliair accessible
for ticket a n d registration information call M E T I ^ ACT at
326-2660
may be tnore likely to occur in gay and lesbian
relationships. Family members who ss^ "We
never liked him aiiyway" to a hetenjsexual wDman
v^ith an abusive husband or lever are apt to tell
a lesbian or gay man who is being battered, "^^11,
that's what you get for being in a relationship like
that," I^rker ssud.
"I think the pressure's more intense" in gziy
relationships, she said.
Much of this pressure results from having to
be in the closet and lead dual lives on the job and
at home, I^irker lokl thp audience. Because ofthis,
an abusive partner caii use methods of harrassment that are uiuque to gay relationships, such
as telling bosses and co-workers that the other
partner is gay.
'*lt*s h a r d e n o u g h t o k e e p a j o b if -yot.'re in a
r
M A R C H
ning bell to the world, and duu die male anal
passages were not intended for sexual pleasure.
Several audience membeis reacted strongly to her
speech. Her statemem, "die male body is not a
repository for polluted flukls," created a stir in
the auditorium.
A member of the audience leaped to his feet
and exclaimed, "How can you (the audience)
listen to such prehistoric bullsh*t?" A discussion
about the propriety of such remarks ensued between the fiindamenudist Christian master of
ceremonies and thc audience member, who lef^
af%er making a commem about the propriety of
inviting such speakers to a college campus.
In his response to Highley*s comments,
Szymanski claimed that nowhere in the Bible dkl
God condenm the condition of hom*osexuality.
There are passages that condemn ritual hom*osexuality and occasioiud hom*osexual acts, he said,
but nowhere could he find a condemnation ofthe
hom*osexual conditfon. Szymanski challenged
members of the audience to find such a passage,
noting that even Jesus had not one word to say
about the issue.
Both debating teams remained controlled
Workshop addresses violence in gay relationships
325-1198
"We do it without shorts"
was a constant concern for her and tfaat she was
only able to overcome the orientation by giving
her lifie completely to her Lord. She said that
shordy after this conversion experience she met
Ron, her husband, and with his help worked out
many of the issues that caused her lesbian
orientation.
Szymanski described bow he as a seminarian
had recognized his own sexual orientation. In a
search for some resolution of the issues it raised, he conducted a survey of his fellow students.
He found that a third of them had a hom*osexual
or bisexual orientation. Szymanski said he felt
somewhat comforted fay the number of his fellow
gay religious, but he pursued a heterosexual martriage for several years before finally coming out
of the closet and divorcing his wife.
Russell also described his experience in a
heterosexual marriage. Unwilling to continue
what he conskiered a dishonest life, he divorced
his wife and pursued a gi^ relationship for seven
years. He spoke with fervor and sincerity about
his personal conversion experience when, as a
young man, he came UJ believe in God*s existence.
Joann Highley claimed that AIDS is God*s war-
423-1669 Vor TTY
Repairs to full replacement
Any size jobs at all
Free estimates
Call & leave message
• • •
EMPTY CLOSET
BICYCLE-SKI SHOP AND PERSONAL FITNESS CENTER
1149 Culwr Road • 473-3724
Open: Mon.. Sat.. 1(M: Tues.. Thurs.. Fri.. 106; MM.. 1&6
Gerald L . Begy, Ph.D.
COUNSELOR
Diploma in Gestalt Psychotherapy
244-2747
Calls Returned
Fbr individual support
and persor}al growth
pi
4
EMPTY CLOSET
Mareh 1, 1988
Mareh 1, 1988
Local News
Gays and Christians debate at R I T
Rochester to celebrate Women ^s
By Mkhdle Moore
This year's k>cal International Women's Day
celebratKHi will include a talk by a Uack Soudi
African woman living in exile in tochesler. a lunchtime coocen tsy die Rochester Wbmen's Chonis,
evening performances by deaf poet I>d>bie Rennie and musicians Casselberry-Dupree and their
band, and a day (tf workshops on a variety of
issues.
This year's dieme, **Claim our history, forge
the future;* was chosen to call attention to
women's accomplishments throughout history as
well as address present and ftmire issues that concern women. "It's klea of you need to know
where you come from in order to know where
you're going,**' saki Maria Scipkme, and oiganizer
of the event.
Thc organizers of last year's celebration diought
die dayfeh''fragmented,*' Scipfone sakl, so this
year organizers chose a dieme and have planned
a closing sessionfordiscus$k>n, reviewing the
workshops and networking.
Workshop topks include women of color and
feminism, self perception and body inuige, okter
women, spirituality, high school women and
feminism, occupational health issues, women and
AIDS, self defense, and issues for differendyabied women.
The events, whkh will be held on March 12
at die YWCA. 175 North Ointon Ave., will begin
with a talk by ZoZo Laird, who has been involved in ami-apartheid activities during the 17 years
she has lived in Rochester.
The evening entertainment will include a concert by nationally-known musicians J. Casselberry
and Jaque DuPrce, with Ibshi Reagon on bass and
Annette A. Aguilar on percussion. The group
combines r^gae, blues, folk, gospel, country,
Latin and soul with stroiig political lyrics. Their
second record. City Down, won an awardforbest
reggae album of 1986 from the National Association of Independent Record Distributors.
Tickets are $K>-$15 ($20 sponsor level) and are
available at Jazzberry's. 713 Monroe Are.; Rectnd
Archive, 1394 Mt. Hope Ave.; and Sllkwood
Books, 633 Monroe Ave. The conceit, and a performance by deaf poet
8 p.m. at die YWCA.
TTie workshor—
tion IS recomme
all events. The
differea^y-nUed
interiMHad.; A v
berry*s» n ^ be:
are weloone.
Theceiebnti<
local groups.
For mom info
Metro-Act at 32
The Inteirnatk
9:30-10 aun*.
10-U a.ni.: K
U:15 a.m.42:
"W)menofCol
by Barbara St. h
By andforYbun
situations that fa
Thra Yellin & Sc
we need politica
COMING
If so, can we lii
Cindy Sangree;
GAGV, where he served as an at-large member
Cowell,
RN-Mi
of the board of directors for a year, and of the
Tksk
Force
on /
Rochester Lesbian and Gay Political Caucus.
tion Unit, Univi
He was a member of GAGV's speakers' bureau
of
Rochester; m
and also did speaking engagementsforthe
W>meninRoclk
Rochester chapter of l^irents and Friends of LesMorton,
direct
bians and Gays. In 1983 and 1984 Dardano lobform
About
Ok
bied the Rochester City Council and the Monroe
1-1:30 pim.
County Legislature for passive of civil rights
1:30-1:50
legislation.
Chorus.
Dardano also served as chairman of the 26th
Legislative District Democratic Committee, and
2-3^30 p.1
worked as subscription manager and a reporter
"W^men
Act, and JI
and columnist for the Empty Closet,
lege; **Mii
In Washington, D C , Dardano is chairman of
Vercxiption*
GSDC's elections committee, and chairman of the
speakers' bureau ofthe Gay and Lesbian Activists
Alliance of Washington, D C
Fbrmer Rochester gay activist Bob Dardano has
announced his candkiacyfora seat on the District
of Columbia Democratic Slate Comminee.
Dardano and other members of the Gertrude
Stein Democratic Club (GSDC), >^^hington,
D.C.'s gay and lesbian Democratic club, arc running as a slate in the May 3 election. Their goal
is to see the election of as many openly gay and
lesbian people possible lo the 70-member D C
Democratic State Committee, with some GSDC
members rurming at-large and others running for
ward (district) seats. Dardano is running to represent Ward 6 (Capitol Hill), and if elected would
serve a four-year term of office.
While in Rochester, Dardano served as field
direcror of Ttm Mains" 1985 campaign for City
Council. In 1984 he received the Vinnie Cup
award from the Gay Alliance of Genesee VWley
(GAGV). Dardano was an active member of the
By Martin H k a i a
Ron and Joann^Highl^ of LIFE ministries in
Manhattan came wdl-prqpared to debate the
hofnoacBoid issue ac die Feb. 16 joint meetii^ of
Oiys, LesbiaiMi and Friends Student Ofgmizatipn
(OLFSO) and the Intervarsity Christian
B^tawsh^ at RTT.
deflated fay
^-?^?B«*
of ^Mbmen's Bodks,** feminist concerns in our
acbpob; piesentotiop, disciisskxi, esqierieiMial, by
Meredldi Reiniger. Rosemaiy McCartfay, F^mia
Sahrfo and Ann MacBimey; "Wimea's Spiritual
« • — ' - by Rev. Judkb C r e s ^ ; 'Xkaqntional
A i g d a DMiK», heahh A
was a constant cooceraforher and diat she was
only able to overcome the orientation by giving
her life con^etely to her Lord. She said that
shortly after this conversion experience she met
Ron, her husband, and with his help worked out
many of the issues that caused her lesbian
orientation.
Szymttttki described bow he as a seminarian
his own aexttal orientation. In a
fl|lfllil|lia|| a i the issues it rais^ w m ^ ^ fidlow students.
wj^tinitm had a )M>moseximl
rmansid said he felt
niunber of his fellow
a heterosexual marfinally coming out
his wife.
his experience in a
Unwilliiig to continue
diihoHest life, he divorced
gay rdationshipforseven
fervtyr and sincerity about
experience when, as a
believe in God*s existence.
diat AIDS IS Ck>d*s war-
We'll help JOU come out
to vour parents.
Activist runs in D.C.
Come hear our presentation
• ask questions
• get support
as heterosexual
social workers and other
in high schools, colleges
was sponsored by the
Relatioiiship Violence at
C o l l c ^ at Brockport, AlterWonien and the Men*s Educa^AMahop of Genesee Menfig does occur in gay relationships,
seen by heterosexual society and
^^kwble deviance."
and relatives blame the batthey discover there has been
and this victim-blaming
M.S. Ed.
David A. B i s c h o p i n g
CONTRACTOR
Couples
iiitation
Older Home Specialist
OOHESTER
— X : 3 0
ning bell to the worid, and that die male anal
passages were not intendedforsexual pleasure.
Several audience members reacted stroi^y to her
^leech. Her statement, *thc male body is not a
repositoryforpolluted fluids,** created a stir in
the auditorium.
A member of the audience leaped to his feet
and exclaimed, **How can you (the audienoe)
listen to such prehistoric bullsh*t?*' A discussion
about the propriety of such remarks ensued between the fundamentalist Christian master of
ceremonies and thc audience member, who left
after making a comment about the propriety of
inviting such speakers to a college campus.
In his response to Highley*s comments,
Szymanski claimed that nowhere in the Bible did
God condenm the condition of hom*osexuality.
Tbere are passages that condenm ritual hom*osexuality and occasional hom*osexual acts, he said,
but nowhere couM he fmd a condenmation ofthe
hom*osexual condition. Szymanski challenged
inembers of the audience to find such a passage,
noting that even Jesus had not one word to say
about the issue.
Both debating teams remained controlled
—
F> ARE N T S
OF
GAYS
Adjustable Fee
TTY
S : O O
may be more likely to occur in g ^ and lesbian
relationships. Family members who si^ "Wc
never liked him anyway** to a heterosexual iimman
with an abusive bustoid or lover are apt to tell
a lesbian or gay man vt^io is being batiered, "Well,
that's what you getforbeing in a relationship like
that," l^rker said.
**I think the pressure's more intense" in gay
relationships, she said.
Much of this pressure resulcs from having to
be in the closet and lead dual lives on the job and
at home, Ruker tokl the audience. Because of tfais,
an abusive partner can use methods of harrassmem that are unique to gay relationships, such
as tellir^ bosses and co-workers that the other
partner is gay.
"It's hard enough lo keep a job if yoi.'rc in a
violent relationshtp," she said. "U your panner
who's harassing you is calling up (the workplace)
and you're not out at work, you can lose your job."
REirker said ifs impossible to tell how many lesbians and gay men havefostjobs this way, because
so many people are closeted.
The AIDS epidemic has put great pressure on
gay male relationships, she said. "There's almost
an assumption that if you're giQr you either have
AIDS or you're goi^g to get AIDS," Juicer said.
"Many men now equate sex with death," she
said, and they are either optingforcelibacy or
denying the dangers of the crisis and using unsafe sexual practices.
Many lesbian and gay relationships also lack
the femily support systems that heterosexual partnets takeforgranted, IMcer said.
**The assumptions heterosexual couples make
Repairs to full replacement
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Free estimates
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bian and bisexual
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1149 Culver Road • 473-3724
Open: Mon.. Sat., 104; Tues.. Thurs.. Fri.. i a « : MM.. KV6
DImctor
Saturday. March 12.1988 YWCA
Auditorium
all events are Interpreted for ttie tiearing Impaired
and arewheelctiair accessible
for ticket and registration Information call METRO ACT at
325-2560
See a r t i d e o n this p a g e for details.
are not madeforgi^ couples," she said. Holidays
can be particulariy difficult for gay couples
because gay partners are not always included in
get-togethers with each other's exl^ided femilies,
while heterosexuals' spouses or lovers are.
Endir^ a gay or lesbian relationship may be
more difficult, Parker said, because the partners
have no role models. The ex-lovers nu^ be extremely angry, but have no societally sanctioned
outletfortheir feelings.
"One of the things you get in a heterosexual
relationship is *Damn you, talk to my attorney."*
she said. 'There are none of these kinds of oudets,
no legal redress"forgays who are splitting up.
Parker told professionals in thc audience that
they can help by becoming faxniliar and comfortable with g^iys and gay issues, or by finding other
professionals in thieir field who ate oomfonable
and can be used for referrals. She recommended
that they work with groups such as GAGV and
Rochester Association of Gay and Lesbian Mental Health Professionals to leam more about gay
issues.
Lesbians and gay men can go to criminal court
to obtain an onier of protection if their partners
are abusive, but the decision to use the court
^stem "is tantamount lo saying Tm coming out,"*
nuicer said.
One workshop participant who vMxks within the
criminal justice sysiem said many gays who go
to court must deal with extreme hom*ophobia, and
she advocated that gays not use the court system
in domestic violence cases.
"What the courts were doiiig with rape victims
20 years ago. they're doing to gays now," she said.
Tbnym atmt M $4SOI
•*•,
We do it without shorts"
despius accusatiotts leveled at them durii^ the
question-and-answer period. Neither group was
willing to change its statements, but both 1 ^
satisfied that dieir messages had been heard.
"Everyone who came to the meeting appeared to
have a position on the topic when they arrived,
and seem to have left with the same convictions,**
a heterosexual GLFSO supponer said.
After the meeting, members of both groups and
their supporters oonfrofited the debaters on stands
t h ^ had taken, some demanding u> know the
answers to doctrinal questiotis.
One fundamentalist Christian asked Szymanski if he couldn't read "what any eighth grader
could understand** in her Bible. Doesn*t the Bible cleariy teach that hom*osexuality was wrong?,
she demanded. Szymanski remained calm, and
the woman refused to hear his answer and
stomped away.
After an offer of literature, die LIFE ministries
team and their entourage of about 45 people
departed. GLFSO members noted that many audience members who claimed they supported thc
Christian fellowship regularly visit local gay bars
and even atiend GLFSO meetings.
ry*
s violence in gay relationships
OUT
please call if interested
Design • Drywall • Painting
Carpentry • Decks
Roofing & Gutters
Additions
EMPTY CLOSET
m^^-sss^^
JT-*^
V i r n s m , A.CS.W.
Gerald L. Begy, Ph.Di
T I M O T H Y S C H A P P , M.S. Ed., NCC
Nationally Certified Counselor offers individual,
couples and group counseling and support
Call 244-1406 or 325-4090
MEDICAL ARTS PSYCHOTHERAPY ASSOC.
COUNSELOR
Diploma in Gestalt Psychotherapy
244-2747
1
Calls Returr)ed
For individual support
and personal growth
!
\
••
i|^^^^'<^^v••f<^••^ - ^ " • * ^ » u . ^ * T » .
6
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
GACV
GAGV to present service awards March 20
Hie GiQr Alliance of Genesee Vdl^ will honor
two of its members for service to the gay and lesbian communiiy at die 14di annual Vmnie/Vicki
cup awards dinner, Sunday, Mareh 20 at the
Bachelor Forum, H)6S East Main St.
In 1975, Fonun owner Amie Pegish b^an die
Vinnie Cup award, for die GAGV member who
has made the greatest comributions to the gay
community in the past year, to memorialize his
friend and co-owner Vmnie Wheeler. A second
Vinnie Cup was designated for women in 1979;
in 1984 die women's amard was renamed die Vicki
Cup to honor the late Vicki Russo, a Forum
employee.
Proceeds from the $5 ticket cost will go to the
GAGV building fond; tickets will be available at
the door. The spaghetti dinner will b^in at 6 p.m.
The GAGV board of directors has nominated
four men and four women "whose contributions
have enhanced the progress ofthe gay community." Vicki Cup nominees are Beth Bloom, Autumn
Craft, Robyn Freeh and Clair "Chic" P&rker. Vinnie Cup nominees are Bill DeStevens, Matt Fleig,
Jim Gerhard and Bob Owens.
Beth Bloom has worked as a volunteer at AIDS
Rochester, Inc. for three years, and is currently
presidem of the board of directors. She was also
involved with GAGV for several years, and did
writing, photography, and layout and pasteup for
the En^Hy Chset.
GAGV president Autumn Crafk came to the
group after working with National Organization
for W^men. She was a GAGV peerfocilitaforfor
several years, and in 1985 re-started the Lesbian
Resource Center.
Robyn Freeh, a founder in 1985 of Lambda,
Nazareth College's lesbian and gay student
otganization, was one of two local organizers of
last October's National March on ^^^ishington for
Lesbian and Gay Rights. She is membership
chairperson of New York State Lesbian and Gay
Lobby, a member of the executive Committee <^
Rochester Lesbian and Gay Political Caucus and
a volunteer at the Empty Closet.
Chic I^rker has been a representative-at-laige
on the GAGV board of directors for many years,
and for the last several years has served as
chairperson <^ the annual Gay Community Picnic.
Vinnie Cup nominee Bill DeStevens has been
a member of Dignity/Integrity (D/I), the group
for gay and lesbian Catholics and Episcopalians,
for years, and has served as president twice and
Jim Geriiaid was chairperaon of die GAGV
treasurer once. He is an active member of the
^leakers' bureau AM* several years and a peer
local chapterjif Patents and Friends d Lesbians
facilitator for more than four years, a
and Gays (I^fents FLAG), has worked widi peorq>resentative-at-laige on the GAGV board and
ple with AIDS duough Strong Memorial Ho^Mtal
a
volunteer widi Alpha, the gfoi^i for lesbian and
and served as interim treasurer of the GAGV
gay young p e c ^ . He also designed many posters
several years ago.
for GAOV and did photography, layout, graphics
Matt Fleig is an active member of D/I and
I^rents FLAG, and has served as a liason to the and adverting workforthe £jfv^ OOMTfornine
years. Gerhard moved to Philadelphia last
GAGV board for both organizations. After police
forced him and his lover to leave Durand Beach < summer.
GAGV vice preskient Bob OwensfoundedOut
in the summer c^ 1986 because heterosexual
&
About, the gay and lesbian outing group, more
beach-goers objected to their kissing in public,
than four years ago, and has been co-chairperson
Fleig helped oiganize a protest "kiss-in" at the
since. He has woriced on the Empty Closet for
beach the following summer. He was secretary
three years and is active in the GAGV speakers'
of the GAGV board in 1987 and is now liason to
bureau.
thc board from D/I.
Peer facilitator
training offered
The Gay Alliance of thc Genesee Valley
(GAGV) will conduct training sessions in March
for people interested in becoming peer iacilitaiofs.
Volunteer peer ^ilitaiors' duties include answering the GAGV phones and providing callers and
visitors with information and referrals.
The main training session will take place on
Saturday moming, Mareh 26. and participants
must attendfollow-upsessions every two months
on Fridays from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m.
Peer fecilitators cover the GAGV phone line
Monday-Frid^ from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m. and Monday and Mfednesday from 9 a.m. to noon. The
GAGV hopes to extend phone coverage as more
people volunteer to become peer focilitators.
Call die GAGV office at 244-8640, or Mardia
Howden at 442-29S6, and leave your name and
phone number if you are interested in attending
the training sessions.
SUNDAY, MARCH 20, 6 PM
^
^#
BACHELOR FORUM
1065 E A S T M A I N A T GOODMAN ^
*5 at Door
^Spaghetti Dinner
^
A B E N E F I T FOR T H E G A Y A L L I A N C E OF T H E G E N E S E E V A L L E Y
The Gay Alliance of the G^enesee Valley
Confidential Membership Registration Form
713 Monroe Avenue, Rochester, NY 14607
716-244-8640
Name:
Address:
City:
State:
Zip:
Home Phone:
W)rk Phone:
We request the following information for statistical purposes oniy.
Age:
Gay Community Picnic
volunteer meeting
March 15, 7:30 pm
GAGV lounge
713 Monroe Ave.
Lesbian
Resource
Center
Sex:
Race:
Type of Membership
(Please check one)
Jndividual
$25 Annually
Jiousehold
$40 Annually
$20 Annually
Student
$50 Annually
.Contributing
$100 Annually
J^tron
$250 Annually
JBene&ctor
$600
J^ifetime
$50 Annually
Business
J contribute through the Uniied ^ \ ^
Mcmbersdilp Benefits
(Please check if you want)
JSend tne n ^ free subscription to the
Empty Closet,
Please also enroll nie free in the following
ONE GAGV organization:
IRC
brotherhood
3 free coffediouses
JH}litical Caucus
.Out and About
Send me more information about the group checked
above.
Membership is tax deductible. Please make checks payable to "GAGV" or ' T h e Alliance."
Meets the first and
third Wednesday each
month 7:30-9:30
A social and InfornrKitional
exclxsnge for lesbian and
bisexual women
J wish to volunteer time or services. I have interests or skills in the foUowing areas. (Check all that apply,)
financial
Legal
Planning events
.Clerical
J¥er Facilitator
J\>iitical Activities
34embership
J^nonnd
JLong-ru!^ Planning
JHindraising
Public ^teaking
I imderstaAd thtf membenhip entitles me k> voting privities of the general membership, to attend the annual meeting, discounts for GAGV events, ftee membership in one GAGV activity group, and membership in die Genesee Co-op I W a a l Ciedtt
Union. The membership list is confidential and is cvailable only lo the Membership Conamitlee.
Signature
Send fom in confidence to: Membersh^ Commitlee, GAGV, 7B Monroe Avenue. Rochester, NY 14607.
^-1
March 1, 1988
EMPTY
CIJOSET
From the president
By Antnnn W* Craft
Febniary is a short inonth, ao this will be a
short afticle. If Fd had two mote diys lo write
this March column, it could have been longer.
Mfe continue to be bviy at the Giy Alliance of
Genesee ^6dley (GAGV). In hue January, six
board members met with die Minority Afbirs
Conunittee of the Democrat attd Chttmicle. Bob
Owens, GAGV vice preskient, chaired the committee and oiganized an cfiecdve and informative
exchange. I think the meeting was positive. Mfe
ofifeied both praise and criticism of coverage of
gay issues in the paper. Bob is also working on
several grant proposals for the GAGV.
The new gay men's group had its first meetiog
in February, with nine energetk attendees and
calls (^regret from several ochers. It kx>k8 as if
this group will grow qukkly.
In February, as part ofour five-year goals, the
Board of Directors appnwed some one^ear objective^, l b begin, we want to increase our
membershipfour-foldin 198& More on the forthcoming membership campaign in the next lew
months.
Save diese dates: Sunday, March 20 is the
Vinnie-Vicki Cup Awards Dinner at the Bachelor
Forum Oots of spoghetd, warm hospitality from
Amie, and friendliness aboundit^.) Tkkets are
$5 and all of die mon^ benefits GAGV. See die
article on theftrflowingpage for details.
Saturday, April 30 b the GAGV Annual Dinner. This b fcM' members and iiwited guests. Ill
get to tell you how successful past-i|>resideni
Horace Lethbridge was in 1987, and well have
a few minor changes proposed for our by-laws.
The best part b the food: well be at the Hong
Kong Restaurant again. Last year everything was
delicious, and there was morefooddian we could
possibly eat. There's only room for 100 people,
so buy your tickets eariy. Hckets are $11 each.
The Annual Dinner is not a fundraiser; we otdy
change m o i ^ money to cover the costs.
Help Wanted
In additfon to GAGV activities, the Rochesier
Gay Men's Chonis is having its spring concert
prognun on M a r ^ 26 and 27. Ifyou enjoy listening to good singing and you have never lOtended
a RGMC concen, you have definitely missed
something wonderfid. T h ^ do a lot for our community, so I encourage you to support tfaem.
Okay women, in case your dance calendar fills
qukkly, save April 16 for the Lesbian Resource
Center Sock Hop. Each dance gets bigger and b
just as gretf as the first. And the GAGV Annual
Gay Picnk witl be July 17.
BIWRIFMM
Part-Time
Center Director/Office Manager
forthe
Qay Alliance of Geneaee Valley
We are seeking 100 people,
businesses and groups to donate
$100 or more each, to help
finance downpayment and closing costs for our new gay community center.
Rnnponnlbillttos:
1. Manage the daily acthfltles of the GAGV office.
2. Coordinate the activities of office volunteers. Including training and
scheduling.
a Initiate and maintain contact with community leaders and the media
as a representative of the GAGV.
H o u m : 20 hours per week. Rexible. Some evening hours required.
Qtjalifications: Bachelor's degree or equivalent life experiences.
Good organizatk)n, writing, and speaking skills. Selfmotivation. Ability to work without d o s e supervision.
Strong belief in the purpose and functkins of the
Gay AlHance.
Salary: $6,000 r>er year
Send letter of application and resume in confidence to: Personnel Committee Chairman, GAQV, 713C Monroe Aventie. Rochester, NY 14607. ApplicatkMis by maii only. Applk:ations shoukj be received no later than Monday
March 1&
— -?
A R>unders Club plaque will be
engraved with members* names.
If they wish, and placed in our
new center.
Send check payable to the GAGV
Buikling Fund.
$ 9391(2/87)
$ 9^32(1/17)
Cail 244-8640 a n d leave a
message if y o u w i s h t o l e a m
how you c a n help.
$ 7,465 (12A6)
GAGV Photo Contest
Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley
We n e e d your pictures!
The Gay Alliance of Genesee Valley is preparing a publicity
brochure for the upcoming memt>ership canipaign. In it we
would like to include pictures of GAGV, LRQ Out and About,
Gay Political Caucus, Alpha, and Gay Brotherhood events.
We need your help.
Rules:
1. Black and white pictures only.
2. Pictures must have been taken at events sponsored
by the groups listed at>ove.
a People in the picture must be identified.
4. Written permission to publish the picture from each
person in the picture must accompany each entry.
5. Submit each picture in a separate envelope. Your
name, address, phone number, date and name of
event at which the picture was taken, and names of
the people in the picture should t>6 written on the
back of each photo. Also include written permission
for publication from each person in the picture
in the envelope.
6L Entries not complying with all of the rules witt not be
considered.
7. Pictures will become the property of the Gay Alliance
of Genesee Valley and will not be returned.
& Put>iication of winnir>g picture is rK>t guaranteed.
Annual Dinner
Saturday, April 30
Hong Kong Restaurant
Entry Deadline ia March 11, 1986
Prise: Orte-year irulividual or household membership in
QAGV which includes a subscription to the Empty
Closet; free enrollment in LRC, Gay Brotherhood.
Gay Political Caucus, Out and About, or 5 free
coffeehouses; and membership in the Genesee
Co-op Federal Credit Union.
SubmH Entriea t o : QAGV Pholo Contest, GAQV,
713 Monroe Ave.,
Rochesier, NY 14607.
Winner will be announced in the April issue of the Empty
Closet.
291 Alexander St.
Cash Bar 6 pm
Dinner 7 pm
$11 per person
Tickets available at GAGV office.
from board members
& at Silkwood Books.
633 Monroe Ave.
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a
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Newsffronts
Justice Dept.
study examines
hate crimes
A recent U. S. Department of Justice study of
vk>leiice based on sexual orientation, race,
leligion and ethnicity has concluded that such
crimes are ^'widespread" and appear to be
increasing.
According to the repon, 'ihe most frequent victims of hate violence today are blacks, Hispanics,
Southeast Asians, Jews and gays and lesbians.
hom*osexuals are probably the most frequent victims."
The study, which was undertaken after lobbying fay National Gay and Lesbian Task Force
(NGLTF) and other professional and civil rights
groups, was sponsored by the National Institute
of Justice—the research arm of the Justice
Departmem.
The report*s corKlusions are based on interviews with 40 respondents, including representatives ofthe criminal justice system, constituency
oiganizations and organizations devoted to preventing hate violence.
According to thc report, crimes of bias "are fer
nwre serious than comparable crimes that do not
involve prejudice because they are interxled to intimidate an entire group... our country is founded upon principles of equality, fieedom of association and individual liberty; as such, bias crimes
tear at the very fabric of our society."
"The criminal justice system—like the rest of
society—has rjot recognized the seriousness ofthe
hate violence problem."
The NU report acknowledges some of the particular problems facing anti-gay violence victims,
such as the fact that gay victims often fear public
exposure and, aiong with Southeast Asians, are
e!9)ecially reluctant to report crime. While noting
that "hom*osexuals are piobably the most frequent
victitns" the report states that "alttuyst notie'^ of
the stames (that address crimes of bias) include
gay and lesbian victims of bias.
Thc report calls for strategics to "encourage
legislatutes to include gays and lesbians in their
statues," reconunends training for police and prosecutors in identifying, investigating and prosecuting crimes based on prejudice, and in worki i ^ with victims and their communities.
Group begins
program on
women & AIDS
women's Action Alliance recently b ^ a n a project to prwide AIDS education through women's
centers and organizations in New \brk and New
Jersey.
The ^M>men*s Centers and AIDS Project, one
ofthe first of its kind in the New York Area, will
provide training, support and networking opportunities to the staf& of women's centers. The project will taiget underserved minority and lowincome women, who represent a disproportionate
number of new AIDS cases.
^bmen now are the fastest growing group at
risk for HTV infection. The problem is especially severe in the New \brk City-New Jersey area,
where AIDS has become the leading cause of
death for wonien between 18 and 34 years old.
The ruling does not say that gays in the military
are protected from disciplinary action if they
engage in hom*osexual acts. It only specifies that
t h ^ may not be. disciplined siinply because they
are of a "hom*osexual orientation"--that is, t h ^
prefer g ^ sex, whether or not ihey personally
engage in it.
\bsterday*s ruling is almost cerUin to be
challenged tay the governmem, although c^icials
here sakl they wanted to study it flnt before choosiiig their next step.
The military has long believed that "hom*osexuality is incompatible with military service " an
Army spokesman noted yesten%.
The mling came in the case of a sergeaitt, I^rry
J. Watkins of Seattle, who as a 14-year veteran
was ordered dischaiged after the Army in 1981
adopted its new regulation declaring that anyone
who is hom*osexual must be discharged or must
be denied a chance to re-enjist.
--The Baltimore Sttn
Court bars
U.S. Army
discrimination
The conservative New Hampshire state senate
dismissed by voice vote a proposal to
recriminalize "unnatural and lascivious acts" in
mid-January.
Had it passed, the bill would have created a
class B felony crime, but did not define what was
meant by "unnatural and lascivious acts." No
debate on thc bill took place. New Hampshire
decriminalized private, adult, consensual sexual
behavior in 1973.
Thc defeat of ihe bill followed the Jan. 11 hearing and a negative vote in the Senate Judiciary
Committee. Sen. Jack Chandler, sponsor of the
bill, was the oniy pei^son who testified in suppoit,
saying it was needed to "wipe out deviant
behavior."
Unlike last year's bill to prohibit foster care
placements with lesbians and giav men, Chandler^s
rccriminalization bill attracted very little attention from members of the seiuue or the New
Hampsire news media.
"Chandler's bill had so little support that it was
defeated as part of a package of several other
bills," said Susan Bruce of the New Hampshire
Citizens Alliance for Gz^ and Lesbian Rights.
"We're pleased this bill died a natural and uncomplicated death. Wc feel confident it won't be
resurrected in the future."
Cont'd, from page 1
emitlement programs and other federally funded
programs to equalize access for those in nontraditioiud relationships.
•Opposes expansion of the definitfons of survivors
and dependents under the Social Security program
to include domestic or family partners.
•Supports placement of foster children with
relatives first, or in families with married couples,
piefefobly where the family has prior parenting
experience. Where a traditional family is not
available, believes another home ttit^ be an appropriate placemem.
Ridinrd Gepbanlt
Gay/Lcsbinn Chil Rights
•Is not a co-sponsor of S464/HR 7D9, but says
he would sign it into law if it were passed by
Congress.
•W>uld sign a presidential executive order banning discrimination only if a determination was
made that the Constitutinot protect federal employees.
AIDS Polky
•Supports "more money" for AIDS research.
Supports making AZT available to all who might
benefit firom it.
•Supports insurance fbr catastrophic illnesses.
Believes insurance companies who deny covei^e
to high-risk groups are "heading in the wrong
direction."
•Opposes employment discrimination against
PWAs.
•Opposes use of quarantine in management of
AIDS patients.
,
Lesbian/Gay lOunlly Issues
•His administration would be committed to providing services in an efficient, effective and nondiscriminatory manner. This commitment includes ensuring thai those in non-traditional relationships and households are not judged ineligible solely on the basis of such relationships.
Jesse Jackson
Gay/Lesbian Civil Rights
•Supports passage of federal gay/lesbian rights bill
and supports ftill civil and fegai rights for lesbians
aixI gay men. Will fight any restrictions based on
sexual orientation.
•Is committed to issuing presidential executive
Older banning discrimination in federal govemment, including the military. W^uld exteiKl order
to cover all govemment contractors. Sees executive order being supplemented by a Congressional gay rights bill.
AIDSBolky
•Supports National Academy ot Sciences $2
billion target, but says this may not be an adequate amount.
•Supports makiiig catostrophk; insurance available
as a right; federally-guaranteed access to
treatments and care; creation of stop loss or reinsurance pools.
•Believes we neqd to develop a national health
care prognun that is federaily funded and equally accessible to all.
•Believes burden of health care coverage should
be home by federal govemment, not the states.
•Supports broad, frank AIDS education. Believes
sudi education should "confrom hom*ophobia, the
irrational and divisive fear, the racism, the victimblaming that impact our efforts to combat this
disease."
•Supports federal legislation banning discrimination against people with AIDS or HIV infection.
•Opposes Reagan Justice Departmem^s interpretation that federal disability laws do not cover people with AIDS or HIV infection.
•Supports Federal AIDS Policy Act (HR 3071/S
1575), which wotild totighen up confidendaUty of
HIV-antibody test results, ban discrimination and
link counseling with testing.
•Opposes mandatory testing.
•Supports the creation of an office of Gay/Lesbian HeolOi Concerns in the Public Health
Service.
Lesbinn/G^ Fiunily Issues
•Supports 1^'ian and gay partners being afforded benefits accorded to heterosexual partners.
•Platform of campaign recognizes diversity within
the human family. Supports ffiill civil rights for
giqr people.
•Supports right of gay people to designate sur-
vivors and dependents. Supports gay peopie*s right
to child custody.
Aud Sbnon
Gi^/Lcsbten Civil Rights
•Simon is one of eight Senate co-sponsors of
S464/HR 709.
•Supports passage of federal legislation banning
discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.
•Wotild issue a presidential executive order banning sexual orientation discriminMion in government employment.
•>^^)uld not ban sexual orientatfon discriminatfon
in the military aiMi security i^ncies.
AIDSMUcy
•Supports NAS taiget figure of $2 billion in funding by 199a
•Supports catastrophic insurance program for all
Americans regardless of age or disease.
•Supports federal guarantee of access to AIDS
treatments for all who are sick.
• S i i f ^ r t s HIV testing by life insurers in large
policies. Opposes denial of insurance coverage
based on pre-existing condition or for those
already covered by insurance. Proposes creation
oi federal reinsurance or stop/loss pool for AIDS
health insurance and would mandate creation of
risk pools for health insurance in every state.
•Opposes discrimination based on HIV-antibody
sUtus. Co-sponsor of the Federal AIDS Policy
Act, which would toughen up confidentiality of
HIV-antibody test results, ban discrimination, and
link counseling with testing.
•Supports current giyvernmem testing policies
regiirding military and foreign service personnel.
Opposes other types cf mandatory testing, except
for blood, sperm and oigan banks.
LcsMan/Gay F)unlly ISMies
•Does not clearly understand implications alfowing domestk: partnership benefits for government employees.
•Believes courts need to decide on a case-by-case
basis issues such as custody arxl the right of gay
men and lesbians to be foster parents and adoptive parents. Believes the basis for these decisfons
should be the quality of care and fove provided
to the child, not the sexual orientation of the prospective parents.
\
Gay and lesbian activist groups have begun to
respond to the failure cS Thne and Newsweek, the
coumry's largest weekly news magazines, to
publish anything about the Oct. 11, 1987 National
March on ^A^ishii^ton for Lesbian and Gay Ri^its
and tiie Oct. 13 civil disobedience action at the
\J.S. St4>reme Court.
Cry Out!, a new Pittsbuigh-based lesbian and
gay actfon group, has called for a boycott of the
two magazines. According to a press release firom
the group, gays are supporting the boycott by
cancelling their subscriptions, retumii^ incomplete subscriptfon canls and not purchasing
the magazines at newsstands.
Representatives of the Gay & Lesbian Alliance
Against Defanuition (GLAAD) met recently with
editors of Time to discuss ways to improving the
maf^azine's coverage of gay issues. Managing
Editor Henry Muiler told GLAAD representatives
it w ^ "probably a mistake" not to cover the
march, in which about 500,000 people
participated.
GLAAD'S executive director, Craig Davklson,
recendy said he blamed Ttme^s coverage problems
on the failure to distinguish between g ^ s and
AIDS. He cited an article in thc Bay Area
Reporter claiming tliat in the 12-month period ending Oct. 19, 1987, Newsweek published six articles about lesbian and g ^ issues unrelated to
AIDS, and Time carried none.
Time followed up a suggestion fay Stephen
Miller, GLAAD media committee chjairperson,
that the magazine assign a correspondent to write
abotn anti-gay violence. The article has not been
published yet.
Miller also suggested that Tittte caver topics
such as lesbian and gay parenting, gays in politics
and the concerns of gay couples.
Newsweek, meanwhile, sent the following letter to readers who protested the lack of coverage
of the Mareh on >^^shinKton:
Dear Reader:
Like you, many people have written to deplore
Newsweek's failure to repon the Oct. 11 National
Mareh on Wsishington for Lesbian and Gay Rights
and the planned civil disobedience that followed
— so many, in fact, tliat we felt this point of view
Official asks for
more money for
AIDS drugs
The head of President Reagan's AIDS commission said on Feb. 19 he would push for more
money to help the Food and Drug Administration review growing numbers of experimental
AIDS drugs.
Research into AIDS drugs has been expanding
quickly, and FDA is reaching the point where
"they will not be able to handle the load and do
the kind of regulatory work that's needed" to
make appropriate drugs available to people who
have AIDS, retired Adm. James D. Watkins said.
A few tens of millions of dollars would help
the FDA handle the load, said >^%ukins, chairman
ofthe Presidential Cotnmission on the Human Immunodeficiency Virus Epidemic.
The FDA approves drugs for marketing and also
can allow expanded use of drugs still being tested.
Adequate money for the FDA is very important to conquer acquired immune deficiency syndrome, Witkins said in an interview during commission hearings.
Without such help, the agency might have to
divert resources from evaluating otfier drugs for
diseases that affect millions of people, he said.
Durir^ the hearings, Witkins asked FIDA Commissioner Frank >bi2ng to work with tfie commission in detailing its needs in sucfrareas as personnel and sctentiric bicilitics.
He told \bung he wanted the commission to be
"your advocate" in its report to tfie president.
Approvals for experiments to try potential AIDS
dnigs in humans have soared in recem years,
lEbtmg sokJ. As of Jan. 31, he sakl, die FDA approved 45 apptk:ations for drugs to boost the immune system, 35 for chemical? to f i ^ the AIDS
vims, 31 for chemicals to treat infections thafoccompoi^ AIDS and four for d i \ ^ to fight AIDSrehittsd cancer.
OfTicial
advocates
AIDS-related
discrimination
Natfonal Gay Rights Advocaies (NGRA), a San
Francisco-based public interest law firm, has
demanded the resignation of assistant U.S. Attorney General Richard K. Willard because of
public statements he has made advocating AIDSrelated discrimination.
According to Nation's "Restaurant News," tlie
high-level Justice Department official made a
speech warning restaurant and business owners
that failure to screen out job applk:ants with AIDS
and HIV infection could result in skyrocketing
costs.
Willard is also quoted as uiging employers to
exclude health covers^ for diseases during an
employee's first few years because he believes
workers infected with HIV choose employers ."to
become eligible for their generous health, disability and death benefits."
NGRA fias asked Massachusetts Rep. Barney
Frank, a member of the House Subcommittee
which oversees tfie Justice Department, to make
an official inquiry into tfie matter.
"Mr. WiUard's statements fly in the face of the
law," said Benjamin Scfiatz, Director of NGRA's
AIDS Civil Rights Project. "The Federal
Rehabilitation Act clearly prohibits AIDS-related
employment discrimination. Neither tlie *fear of
contagion' defense previously cooked up by tfie
Justice Department, nor Mr. WiUard's new 'fear
of financial responsibility' defimse fiave ariy iegal
legitimacy."
NGRA's letter to Frank points out that AIDS
is higfify unlikely to bankrupt employers t>ecatise
AIDS-related fieaJth care costs represent only a
tiiiy ponion of America's medical expenses.
AltfKMigh AIDS can be expensive io treat, a recent report by the Health Insurance Association
of America and the American Council of Life Insurance Shows that AIDS represents jtist .3 percent of the nation's group liealth insurance claims.
The New York State Department of Health has
announced income eligibility guidelines for its
AIDS Dmg Assistance Program (ADAP), which
will use $8.5 million in federal fiinds to purchase
the drug AZT (azidothymidine) for state resklents
with AIDS and advanced ARC (AIDS-related
complex).
Applkants must prwe New >brk state resktency
and medical eligibility, and meet income
guidelines. Anyone with a montiily income of less
than $1,836 or an annual income (^ $22j000
qualifies for assistance under the program.
Tfiose who receive Medicaid benefits are not
eligible for the ADAP program, but ADAP may
provide assistance for eight weeks or longer to
those who are eligible for, but not yet recetving,
Medicaid.
For information and af^ltcations, call the
ADAP toll-free hotline at I-8(X)-542-2437 or
write: ADAP, Box 2052, Albany, NY 12220.
AZT is currently tfie only drug apprcwed by the
Food and Drug Administration for treatment of
AIDS. The annual cost of tfie drug can exceed
$K)jO(X) per patient.
Gay publisher to
donate $ to
AIDS groups
Gay and lesbian book publisher Alyson
Publications will donate one-third of all directmail income received during March to AIDS
organizatfons.
Ttie money will go to tfie American Rmndation for AIDS Research and the PWA (People
With AIDS) Coalition, company president Saslia
Alyson said.
"In addition to gening moriQr to two importam
AIDS groups, we fiope to set a precedent for
AIDS fiindraisirig." Alyson said, "fn the past, Vve
ofien contritxitcd to an AIDS benefit, only to Jeam
later that a disappointingly small percentage of
what I paid actuaUy went towards AIDS work..**
To receive a free catalog of books, call (617)
542-5679, or write Alyson Publications, 40
Plympton St., Boston, MA 02118.
BRUNCHES SERVED
SUNDAY
NOON - 3 PM
LUNCHES SERVED
MONDAY — FRIDAY
11:30 - 2:30
WE'VE COT 'EM!
FABUL0US...FUNCTIONAL..FUTONS!
! & < * •
DINNER SERVED
M O N D A Y - THURSDAY
5:00 - 10:00
FRIDAY 5:00 - 12:00
SATURDAY 6:00 - 11:00
Check for Daily Specials
Consider the Futon! Is it a b e d . . .
a s o f a . . . or o chair? WeH actually
it's all 31
The functional, practical futon can be
used as a bed on the floor, or in a frame.
Folded up. It becomes a cozy,
comfortable chair or sofa. Our fufons are
made of 100% cotton, and there are a
variety of colorful futon covers availablel
UNCLAIMED. ICit^'4^
FKEICHT
TWENTY OOU.ARS OFF
PIANO BAR
WEEKEND NIGHTS
con|ufictloA with any other
vpccial offer.
YlAtSlOW
PtiCESI
/feorMfto & GMWVO S«ores Ody.
so
tSSlW.He«flMUAi.
AtefMftundk
4X4.I090
w i t l i a hundred dolUr {Mircfutc
or more. Limit oftc per cintomer.
Not Valid when used in
jeOCachMfliSI.
tnGmtem
Save the Date: July 17
Rochester Gay Commtmity Picnic
Cormir o/Gardiner BaHt & Lnion
3JS-62J6
C l i p o u t c o u p o n for m 202831 W. HENRIETTA RD. ROCH., NY
9
Health Dept.
to buy AZT
for poor PWAs
URI0R
New Hampshire
sodomy bill
rejected
A federal appeals court, declaring for the first
time that the government nuy not discriminate
against hom*osexuals, barred the Army yesterday
from dischaigiqg or denying re-enlistment of a
soldier merely because he or she is gay.
Tlie 2-1 decision by tbe 9th U.S. Circuit Court
of Appeals in Son Francisco struck down an Army r^tiloftion that says any soldier who is a
liomosexttal must be d i s c h a i ^ and may not reenllst. whether or not he or she has actually
ei^aged in hom*osexual acts.
Gay penons, tbe circuit coun declared, are "a
Jliafawpred group** in atxkty, and tbus t h ^ are
piolected by tbe Constttutkm from being singled
out for n^Mive treatmentfaygovernment action.
Gays protest
magazine
(non) coverage
deserved rqwesentation in our letms column fThe
Mail, Nov. 16). Ws hope that by now you*ve seen
the letter we ptiblished. lAfe do want you to know,
however, that in omitting the story we weren't
willfully ignoring what was indeed a newsworthy event, but simply responding to a dilemma
peculiar to newsweeklies: what to do with Sunday stories. Newsweek goes to press late Saturday night; the march took place on Sundi^r. WE
could not, therefore, have reported on it until the
following week — and by then it would already
have been fully coveredfayother media. (Ws faced
the same dilemma, incidentally, in connectfon
with the W>rld Series, since the outcome was
decided on a Sunday; we passed on that story as
well, to the dismay of numerous readers.)
In conclusion, we are sorry to have disappointed
.you, atid we hope it won't happen again.
EMPTY CLOSET
(716) 424-1090
V
10
EMPTY CLOSET
MARCH
T U E S D A Y
1
E m p t y C l o s « t m a U i n g . EC office,
Genesee Co-Op, 713 Monroe Ave.,
7:30 pm. 244-9030.
March 1, 1918
Match 1. 1988
THURSDAY
3
M e e H n g to form Coalition g a i n s t
Bias-Related
Violence,
Third
Presbyterian Church, Eas* Ave. at Meigs
St.» noon-1:30 p m . Discussion of lobbying for New \t>rk Sfate bills. Info:
A m e r i c a n Civii Liberties U n i o n ,
454-4334.
2
E m p t y C l o s e t staff m e e H n g . EC offk:e. Genesee Co-Op, 713 Monroe Ave..
7:30 pm. 244-9030.
T U E S D A Y
22
G A G V B r i d g e C l u b ^ G A G V lounge,
2 pm. 244-8640.
E D G E (Educating the Disabled in a Gay
Environment) m e e t i n g , Rochester
Center for Independent Uving. 4 6 4 S
Clinton Ave.. 7 p m . Speaker: Jackie
N u d d . executive director, A I D S
Rochester. 2 7 1 - 5 4 9 4 .
S U N D A Y
l a l k : Sharon Komlos, sponsored by
Women's HealthSourcc of Highland
H o s p i t a l . Rochester Academy of
Medicine, 1441 East Ave., 8 p m .
13
G a y M e n ' s G r o u p , GAGV lourge.
7:30 pm. Topic: community resources
and activities for gay men. 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
WEDNESDAY
9
G A G V l>oard m e e t i n g ,
lounge, 7 p m . 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
G a y M e n ' s G r o u p meeting, GAGV
louf>ge, 7 : 3 0 p m . Showir^g of film,
"Before Stonewall." 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
M O N D A Y
14
SATURDAY
19
R o c h e s t e r A C T U P (AIDS Coalition
to Unleash Power) meeting, t i A G V
lounge, 7 p m . 4 4 2 - 3 5 1 9 .
W o r k s h o p : " C o m i n g Out to Your
Parents," St. Luke's Episcopal Church,
17 S. Fitzhugh S t (comer of Broad St.),
1:30-5 p m . Sponsored by Parents and
Friends
of
Lesbians
and
Gays/Rochester. 3 9 2 - 4 7 9 6 .
15
Annual Gay Community Picnic
volunteer meeting, GAGV lounge, 7:30
pm. 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
SATURDAY
12
WEDNESDAY
16
WEDNESDAY
23
l a l k : "Interim: Part One: Representing
the Body," by Mary Kdly. feminist
theorist, artist-in-Tcsedcnce at Califiomia
Institute for the Arts, Univcfsity of
Rochester, Welles-Brown R m . , Rush
Rhees Library, Welles-Brown Rm.. 4
pm. Part of "British Feminism" series.
275-8318.
THURSDAY
18
T a l k : " A Christian Response to AIDS,"
Christ Episcopal Church, 3 6 S. Main
St., Pittsford, 7 p m . Last in a series of
4 lectures.
T U E S D A Y
GAGV
I n t e m a t i o n a i W o m e n ' s D a y celebration. YWCA. 175 N. Clinton Ave.. 9:30
am-5 p m . Free workshops, music by
Rochester Women's Chorus Deaf poetry
performance by Debbie Rennie, concert
by women musicians CasselberryDupree, 8 p m , $10-$15. Sign language
interpreted, accessible, free child care
available. For more information, see article elsewhere in this issue. Info: MetroAct, 3 2 5 - 2 5 6 0 .
l a l k : "Anger! A POsWve Approach to
a Powerful E m o t i o n / * H i g h l a n d
Hospital, 7 : 3 0 p m . Sponsored by
Women*s HeaHhSource.
CALE
Talk: *A Christian Response to AIDS,"
Christ Episcopal Church. 3 6 S Main
St., Pittsford, 7 p m . 3rd in a series of
4 lectures.
M O N D A Y
Rochester Lesbian and Gay
P o l i t i c a l C a u c u s m e e H n g . GAGV
founge, 7 : 3 0 p m . 2 8 8 - 3 2 4 8 .
WEDNESDAY
S U N D A Y
6
20
' ' J a l » Sketehes*' at Avenue P u b t h r u M a r c h 31
Kittleberger Galleries announces
Important Antique Auction
Casselberry-Dupree, March 12
Lesbien Resource Center meeHng,
G A C \ / lounge, 7 : 3 0 p m . Topic: **Lesbians in History." 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
F R I D A Y
P l a y : "Mass Appeal." BlackRose Productions studio. Village Gate Square,
2 7 4 N . Goodman St. (enter rear of
building, off parking lot C. upstairs on
left). 8:15 p m . $ 5 . Tickets: Silkwood
Books, 6 3 3 Monroe Ak/c., or call box
office, 4 4 2 3 0 6 0 .
l a l k : " A I D S : Why It W o n t Go Auvay,"
with panelists Jane Greenlaw, assistant
professor in medical humanities; Jackie
N u d d , executive director, A I D S
Rochester; Dr. Steven Scheibel, fellow
ininfectious diseases; Dr. William Valenti, associate professor of medicine; and
two representatives from UR medical
school class of 1 9 9 0 . University of
Rochester River Campus. Welles-Brown
Rm.. Rush Rhees Library, 7 : 3 0 p m .
S A T U R D A Y
Out & About
262-2913.
bowling
night.
P l a y : "Mass Appeal," BlackRose Productions studio. Village Gate Square.
2 7 4 N. Goodman St.. 8:15 p m , $ 5 .
Tickets: Silkwood Books, 6 3 3 Monroe
>We.. or call box office. 4 4 2 - 3 0 6 0 .
Coming Out Workshop
Presented by
Rochester Parents and Friends
of Lesbians and Oays
March 10
1:30 - 5 p m
S t Luke*s Episcopal Ch.
17 S. Fitzhugh St.
Rochester, N.Y.
392-4796
W ^
The estate of CHARLES G- TURNER, a m o n g o t h e r properties, wili be
auctioned on SATURDAY, MARCH 5 at 10 A.M. at t h e NEW UKRAINIAN
CLUB, 1970 Empire Blvd., Webster, NY. Preview starts at 8 A.M. day of
sale.
PARTIAL LISTING: 7-tbot cigar store Indian; Chippendale highboy; tiger
maple d r o p leaf table; chipped ice reversed painted lamp signed pairpoint; over 25 Oriental ruga including 9 x 12 antique Herez rugs; 9
X 12 antique blue Chinese Peking rug; 9 x 12 Karastans; many fine
smaller p e a ; Ig. walnut secretary desk; oak dental cabinet; round oak
table w/claw feet; oak dressers; Stief animals on wheels; 3 fine marble
busts; Ig, bisque figurines, approx. 24" tall.
Mission Oak including signed L. Sc J.G. Stickley chair; other pegged
Mission pieces; mahogEmy c o m e r shelf; 2 carved chairs with lions and
matching setee; pair wall sconces; oak highboy; oak display case; oak
dresser w/towel bar; oak library table; Victorian marble t o p table; oak
telephones; Ig. oak curved-glass china cabinet; 3 pieces of Old Sleepy
Eye; Ig. Victorian epergne; misc. glassware, etc.
COUNTRY ITEMS a n d COLLECTIBLES: slot machine; swing handle
basket: dolls; wicker baby b u ^ y ; collection of clocks; oak cylinder
phonograph with horn; Chinese porcelain including tine early Rose
Medallion bowl; early Canton umbrella stand; jade figurine; spinning
wheel A; y a m winder; early American rocking chain 4 blanket chests;
early Ameiican weather vane; early brass telescope; ship models; early
brass microscope; early American Shaker box; primitive carrier Sc box;
early American child's sled; Ig. collection of Rose Medallion; early red
Sc white coverlet Collection of quilts including floral applique quilt local
historical quilt; primitive country chest; pair of Staflbrdshire dogs; col*
lection of doorstops including c a t elf, monkey, ships, r a b b i t etc.: cast
iron garden bench; collection of decorated stoneware including Bui^er;
Whites Utica with bird; Haidle Sc Zipf Union Pottery. Newar, NJ; Roseville
pottery; 3 pairs of old ice skates; spongeware collection; etc.
FINE ARTS: Over 15 fine oil paintings including Hudson Riber scene;
2 carved Chinese teakwood chairs; teakwood stand with inlaid m o t h e r
of pearl; Chinese incense burner; collection of early cloisonne vases;
collection of lamps including signed Handel lamp; reversed painted
lamps; leaded lamps; etc.; over 20 pieces of fine antique jewelry including diamond rings; cameo pins; other Victorian Jewelry; 3 sets of
sterling silver fiatware; m a n y other fine pieces of sterling silver: Ivory
Neksukles: 2 Remington bronzes; Chinese Chippendale coffee table;
fabulous Chinese breakfront; early Chinese porcelain including garden
seat; Canton vases, etc.; Ig. collection of briUiant period cut glass; etc.
TERMS: Cash or approved check. All items to be removed at t h e conelusion of auction. A 10 percent buyer's premiimi will be added to the
final purchase price. All Oriental rug sales m u s t be in cash o r by check
pre-approved by the acutioneer personally.
27
epsvs
Hi
Please Join Us At
1
Open A r m s
Metropotitan Comtnunity Church
l a l k : "Violence, Sex. and Violent Sex
in Movies," by Rk:hard Gollin, director
of film studies, and Constance Penley,
assistant professor of English, University ol Rochester Rh/cr Campus, WellesBrown R m . . Rush Rhees Library; 7 : 3 0
pm.
O N G O I N G
T HUR SDAY
S U N D A Y
D i g n i t y / i n t e g r i t y ; St. Luke's Church,
17 S. Fitzhugh St.. 5 p.m. 3 2 8 - 9 7 5 8 .
MetffopoHtan C o m m u n i t y C h u f c h ,
2 4 3 Rosedale St., 6 p.m. 2 7 1 - 8 4 7 8 ,
Lesbian Writers
2448640.
Group*
1
G A G V B r i d g e C h i U G A G V lounge,
2 pm, $ 1 . 244-8640.
M O N D A Y
Gay
Women's
Alcoholics
AnonymouSk St. Luke's Church, 17 S
Fitehugh St., 8 p m . 2 3 2 - 6 7 2 0 .
T
'
11
y
F
Q
y - - ^
n
*l
4
i»
Celebration
G a y A l c o h o l i c s A n o n y m o u s , St
Luke's Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 8 *^'
pm. 467-0877.
Rochester Historical Bowlingj
S o c i e t y , 8:30 p.m. 4 6 7 - 0 8 7 7 .
pm.
U n i v e r s i t y off R o c l i e s t e r G a y a n d
L e s b i a n A s s o c i a t i o n . UR River Campus, Meltora Hail. Rm. 418. 9 p m .
EDGE (EducaHng the Disabled in
a G a y E n v i r o n m e n t ) . Rochesier
Center for Independent Living. 4 6 4 S
Clinton Ave., 7 p m . 2 7 1 - 5 4 9 4 ,
381^739. 3854578.
F
R I
D ^ )f\
V 1 O A G V B r i d l g e C l u b . GAGV lounge,]
••
8 p.m- midnight 2 4 4 8 6 4 0
Rochester Gay Men's Chorus.
Cavalry St. Andrews Church, 6 8
^ ^ l a n d St. at 9 5 Averill Ave.. 7:30 ptm.
2352473.
H I T Gays. Lesbians a n d Friends
S t u d e n t O r g a n i z a t i o n . RIT campus.
C / U Rm. M 2 , 7 p m .
For an Inspiring
Easter
30
C o n c e r t : Rochester Gay Men's
Chorus, Fifth Anniversary Concert,
Hochstein Wusic School. 5 0 N .
Plymouth Ave.. 4 p m , $ 7 ; $ 8 al door.
235-2473.
AliirmatfcNi: G a y a n d Leabian Mor^
m o n a meeting, field trip to F^lmyra,
442-3519.
v&
WEDNESDAY
Parents a n d F r i e n d s off L e s b i a n s
a n d G a y s m e e t i n g , St. Luke's
Episcopal Church. 17 N. Fitzhugh St.,
2 : 3 0 p m . Confidential discusston and
sharing.
SATURDAY
26
S U N D A Y
I
S U N D A Y
R o c h e s t e r A C T U P (AIDS Coalition
to Unleash Powwer) mecHng, G A G V
lounge, 713 Monroe Awe., 7 p m .
Speaker: Jackie N u d d , executive director, AIDS Rochesier. 4 4 2 - 3 5 1 9 .
T a l k : " A Kind of Bravery: Late 17thcentury Feminism in England," by
Rosalind Delmar, editor &i Virago Press,
author & filmmaker. University of
Rochester River Campus, Welles-Brown
Rm., Rush Rhees Library, 4 p m . Part G A G V V l n n i e y ^ l c k l C u p a w a f d s
of
'* B r i t i s h
Feminism"
series. d i n n e i ; Bachelor Fbrum, 1065 E. Main
275-8318.
.
- ^ t . . , 6 p m , $ 5 . 244-4|^4()..
..
:rs
G a y f M i e f S G i o « p begins new series
of meetings. Info: BOK 105. Victor. N Y
14564.
issue. 2 3 5 - 2 4 7 3 .
T a l k : " I ' m Not a Feminist But: C o m parable Worth and Equal Righis for
Women," by Susan Kent, UR Susan B.
Anthony Center. University of Rochester
River Campus, Welles-Brown R m . ,
Rush Rhees Library, 7 : 3 0 p m .
O u t & A b o u t , evening wtth the Bucket
dance troupe, Nazareth Arts Center,
Nazareth College. 2 3 2 - 2 9 1 3 .
11
T U E S D A Y
29
^
C o n c e r t : Rochester C a y Men*s
Chorus, Fifth Anniversary Celebration
Concert, Hochstein Music School, 5 0
N . Plymouth Awe., 8 p m , $ 7 ; $ 8 at
door. For more inlormatkjn, see artide
in
this
B e n e f i t : Wine & cheese reception to
celebrate Wtomen's History Month,
Susan B. Anthony lounge. Unitarian
Church, 2 2 0 S. Winton Rd.. $ 5 go to
Sojourner House. C o m e dressed as
your favorite feminist or as yourself.
N e w V b r k State L e s b i a n a n d G a y
L o b b y meeting, Syracuse. 2 8 8 - 3 2 4 8 .
EMPTY CLOSET
WEDNESDAY
G A G V B r i d g e C l u U G A G V lounge,
8 pm-midnight, $ 1 . 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
Gay
&
Lesbian
Overeaten
AiMMiyuMMMk Unitarian Church, 2 2 i
S. W i n t o n Rd.. 7 p m . Denise,]
482-5822.
S A T URD A
A l p h a gav/lesbian youth group for
ages 16-20. 1-4 p.m. 4 4 2 - 2 9 8 6 . First
and third Saturdays.
G a y A l - A n o n . St. Luke's Church, 17
S Fitzhugh St.. 7 p^m. 2 3 2 - 6 7 2 0 .
to be held at 6 pm
Easter Sunday, April 4, 1988
at 243 Rosedale St. (corner of Monroe Ave)
R o c h e s i e r UAomen's C h o r u s . 142
Mt. W m o n St., 6:15 fxm. 2 4 4 - 3 3 9 2 .
Lesbian R e s o u r c e C e n l e i ; GAGV
lounge, 7 : 3 0 p m . 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 . First and
third \A/ednesdav5.
The GAGV lounge is
located at the Gay Alliance
of the Genesee Valley
715 Monroe Ave.
The Gay-Positive church....
For all the Peoplel
J
The Empty Cioset is planning future
issues on gays in the arts and other
topics, tf you would like to write, take
photographs or lielp tn other w ^ ^ .
please call Mk:heie at 2 4 4 - 9 0 3 0 . We
also need people to help with advertising design, layout and pasteup. A n d
word processing, odd Jobs around the
olBcc, and many other proieds. Call
2 4 4 - 9 0 3 0 to find out how y o u can
helpL
A portuck supper and Informattorwl
nneeting to form a group for b t o c m i a l
I M M M H will be held on April 17; locatton to be antKMfKed. H you are interesied in attendtog, call Mk:hele at
244-9030.
G a y A l c o h o B c s A n o n y m o u s , First
Unitarian Church. 2 2 0 S Winton Road,
7 p.m.
G A C V C o f f e e h o u s e . CACA/ lounge,
$ 1 , 8 p^m.-midnight 2 4 4 - 8 6 4 0 .
Gay
Men*s
Alcoholics
AnoovOMMis. St. Luke's Church. 17 S
Fitzhugh St., 8 : 3 0 p-m. 2 3 2 - 6 7 2 0 .
>1
i
12
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Marilyn: Think carefully before adopting
Bob: A long-distance
nurturing gay father
By Michele Moore
When his one of his sons was 15, Bob Owens
said recently, the teenager fell in love for the first
time arul called to tell his father about it. As he
was describing how it felt to be spendiiig time and
money on someone, visiting her and thinking
about her constandy, he realized something,
Owens said.
"He said to me, *Now I know how you fieel
about him,'" referring to Owens' lover of several
years.
0*jvens came out to his children, twin boys and
a girl, when they were 13 and 12, after he had
met his lover and left his wife. They were surprised to leam that their fother was gay.
**Their first reaction was shock, and my one
son sakl, *Why don't you get it fixed,' as if I had
a flat tire," Owens said.
His wife had insisted he tell the children he was
gay. He had inoved to Roctiester in order to lead
a more openly gay life and stilt be near his kkls,
but ^ r e e months later his wife moved from
Geneseo, wtieie Owens leacties at ttie state tmiver-
sity, to Columbus, Ohio. It was too embarrassing to remain in a small town where everyone
knew about his sexual/emotional orientatfon, she
said.
Owens, who has been active with the Gay
Alliance of Genesee V^ley and is now vice president of the organization, didn't contest custody
of the children during the divorce because he
knew the courts' track record was poor on awarding custody to gay parents, especially fothers.
And being the non-custodial parent lias relieved
him of the reponsibilities of day-to-d^ care for
his Icids so tie's had n[K)re time to work on his relationship with his lover.
He said although his ex-wife ttas tried to turn
ttiem against him, his children, now 15 and 17,
accept ttieir fottier and ttis lover. They spend about
a month at Christmas time, a month in ttie spring
and a couple of weelcs during ttie stunmer with
Owens and his paitner. This stunmer, Owens, his
lover, his children and his parents will spend a
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"Katie's adjustments were multiple, and ttie
issue of gayness was just one of tliem."
Telling friends and dates ttiat her parents are
lesbians is particularly difficult for Katie, and is
more stressiful for her than it would be for a nonadopted child, Marilyn said.
"Her relationships with boys and young men
l)ecome difficult wfien she has to introduce.. .two
women as her parents," she said. "I think it's a
source of pain. She's leamed to ssy, *Thcy like
me, not my parents, and if they can't accept my
parents, they're not worth having a friendship
with.'"
Katie has also discovered that many of her
friends don't have typical nuclear fomilies and
don't care ttiat her parents are two women.
Joanne and Marilyn have dealt with Katie's concerns by letting her express her feelings about
their lesbianism.
"You have to be flexible, creative and open to
letting ttie child say, act out and do what they have
to to assert their own identity and their own independence, which includes stating, 'I don't want
to be g ^ ' and going to the opposite extremes,"
Marilyn said.
For her daughter, this has meant refusing to attend gay community events such as the annual picnic and Rochester G ^ Men's Chonis concerts,
although Katie has liked most of Joanne's and
Marilyn's gay friends that she's met on a one-toone basis.
But not all of their friends have been supportive of them as parents, Marilyn said. Some
friends were willing to socialize with them but
not with ttieir daughter, and the gay community
as a whole was not family-oriented.
"You need to find people who are supportive
of a gay lifestyle and a child lifestyle," she said.
"Groups were a problem, because thc gay community had little fbcus in terms of children; and
l)ecause of this, incorporating our fomily into ttie
gay community was difficult. It was kind of like
living sn neither world and walking a road that
crossed back and forth."
David: Doing my part in 'turkey basting'
Altliough Katie no longer lives with her and
site's noc the legal adoptive mottier, Joanne tias
agreed to let Marilyn continue tier relationship
with the teenager, lliis tias fbrced Joanne and her
to examine their relationship and leam how to
work together as co-parents.
"The definition in ttie lieteroscxual world of
divorce with custody or visitation is non-existent
in the gay community," Marilyn said. "Gays are
confronted with putting what is best for the child
as a real priority, and putting their own i s s u e s hurt, anger—aside from ttiai. The agreement requires maintaining a good relationship with the
other parent, without any structure or model or
legal entity to define what these relationships are
and what they are not."
Marilyn said she and Joanne didn't discuss
parenting issues — including rules, responsibilities, the possibility ofa breakup and changes
in their home that would result from the addition
of a child to the fomily — as thoroughly as they
could have before they adopted Katie.
"Joanne and I wanted to adopt and I agreed to
co-parent," she said. "Once the process began,
I saw my ex-lovcr and I as two pretty stable,
healthy people who could provide a stable, loving home for a child who didn't have one."
Lesbians and g ^ men who want tb have
children have to give more thought to the issues
involved than heterosexuals do, she said. Gays
should make sure they're not romanticizing the
idea of the femily, or having a child to make up
for something that's lacking in ttieir relationships.
"I'm not negative toward g^tys having children,
but I think you have to ask yourself some real
strong questions about whether you're trying to
model yourself after thc heterosexual world,"
Marilyn said. "Perhaps the heterosexual model
of having children is not ttie only model. \bu really tiave to ask, is it your need to do it and are
you placing y o u r needs a h e a d of tbe n e e d s tfiis
child has—emotionally, educationally, socially?
You have to b e honest a b o u t assessing ttu$>.**
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13
Gay and lesbiaii parents
Adoption, msemination & other issues
By Michele Moore
ing to change and that we weren't intetested in
If she could do it over again, Marilyn said, she
a physical relationship with her."
wouldn't adopt a child.
Katie's difficulty with accepting her mothers'
Eight years ago, Marilyn, who is now 41, and
lesbianism has been compounded, Marilyn said,
her lover Joanne, 40, adopted an eight-year-old
by the problems experienced by any older adopted
girl, Katie, thiough the Depattment of Social Serchild. The adoption process provides some supvices. It was Joanne's klea to adopt, and she did
port for the child and parents, but once the adopso as a single parent, but each woman had an
tfon is complete, "you're on your own," she said.
equal part in caring for the child. Marilyn aiKl
When children are sure that they can't be returnJoanne are no longer together as lovers, but
ed to adoption agencies or foster parents, they may
Marilyn still shares in parenting duties.
stop being well-behaved and begin to use some
She wouldn't adopt again, Marilyn said in a reof the survival skills that kept them going before
cent interview, because ofthe problems Katie has
they were adopted, Marilyn saki. Like many other
had with accepting her adopted mothers* lesolder adopted kids, Katie was insecure, and she
bianism. Gays must consider this issue carefully
used lying and exaggeration as self-preservation
before having or adopting children, she said.
methods.
"It's difficult enough when you're gay and
Katie and her mothers also had value difsingle," Marilyn said. **You can say 'I don't need ferences, Marilyn said.
to be accepted and recognized by the non-gay
"The values atKl the attitudes she had when she
world.'
came were not ours, and there were conflicts in
"When you have a child, you can't say that,
terms of religious values, educational valuesbecause the child's identity is linked to yours and
aside from the usual kirtds of 'do your homevwrk'
the child needs to be accepted in a non-gay world.
conflicts," she said.
In order to advocate for a child in this straight
There were also class differences. Katie was inworld, you have to fight the prejudice and the iwnterested in immediate gratification and had no
supportive attitudes and the voices that say,
sense of long-term rewards, Marilyn said. She and
"Gayness is perverted, gayness is unnatural,
Joanne are middle-class, and they saw Katie's
gayness is not normal—all of the stereotypes that
behavior as resulting from more ofa **ghet(o mengo along with that. And the child has to fight these
tality." Katie is also multi-racial, and Marilyn and
also, and the child isn't aware that (the attitudes)
Joanne are white.
are present."
"That brings with it another whole gamut of
Katie didn't know Marilyn arKi Joanne were lesprobtems to deal with," Marilyn said. "Her idenbians when she was adopted, although she did
tity wasn't firmly rooted in the white, black, or
consider both of them her parents. They came out
Hispanic communities, nor firmly rooted in terms
to her several summers ago after being involved
of sexual identity."
at the Women's Encampment for a Future of Peace
Because Katie hadn't had a consistent father
and Justice in Seneca County.
figure, Marilyn said, "her need for attention from
"When Joanne and I told her. there was a
men was exaggerated. I could bring her to work,
tremendous amount of resentment and anger,"
and any man with whom I worked who was kind
Marilyn said. "That subsided somewhat when
and encouraging to her—he could ask her to flip
Katie learned our relationship with her wasn't goover backward and she'd do it.'*
EMPTY CLOSET
1
MdDOMt-AgU
By DavM Nelson
Ihnwl with me to ttie home of Mr. Average in
Anyiown U.S.A. Vie arrive just as he turns ttie
key in his front door. As tie stains ttie door, he
readies for the replay button on his answering
mactune. A quiet lemale voice greets turnfayname
and exclaims, "Guess what, tods^r's ttie day. I'll
b e a t your tiouse at 7. Be ready!"
A hurried glance at his watch tells ttie man that
he has only 20 minutes to be ready for the
woman's visit. He dasties into ttie shower, soaps
up, rinses and towels down in five minutes. As
tie steps out of the stiower, tie reaches into the
medicine cabinet for a small tx>ttle. BotUe and
ci^i in tiand,' he slips into bed with his fovorite
visuals. He performs his ritual task adeptly and
nils the bottle with a precious fluid. He caps the
bottle carefully and dresses. Three minutes to
7—nM a moment to spare.
As he sits to wail for his female caller, he slips
the bottie between his legs and picks up the evening paper to read. The doorbell rings and the man
rises to greet his guest and her female lover. "Not
a moment to lose," she exclaims.
IXiming quickly on their heels, the two women
return hurriedly to ttieir car, stiouting ttieir ttianks.
With a sigh of relief, he closes the door and
returns to the evening news.
Tliree weeks later, Mr. Average steps in from
a long day's work. He turns on the answering
machine and hears, "It worked! I missed my
period!" Silentiy thanking ttie gods, he whispers
a prayer ttiat this time the insemination will take.
The past four months have been tiard on the man
ttie the two women. But at last the turkey baster
tias pulled through.
Incredible as it seems, this story is true. It is
my own. I consider myself an average man. No
great sexiial prowess, just a willingness to help
friends in need. 1 choose to use a pseudonym to
protect the identity ofthe littie girl who was bort\
-to my friends nine months after this story took
place.
TUrkey basting, as I choose to call amateur artificial insemination, is not as simple as the name
implies. Months of preparation preceded our first
attempts. Ann and Grace had taken no small step
in deciding to tiave a child. Both in ttieir late 30s,
tlM^ examined in detail their tiealth and ttieir willingness to put their lives on the line. They then
tiad to decide who would actually bear the child.
Ann t>ecanie ttie candidate because stie was in better overaU health, and because stie was larger they
ttiought stie could tiandle the stress and strain of
pr^nancy and childbirth.
T h ^ tiad both considered ttie possibility of usit^ a spemi bank. Their fiist interview at the bank
convinced them diffcrentiy. Tticy learned during
tlieir first visit ttiat ttie fee for insemination ranges
from $2,500 to $7,000 depending on tlie donor
and recipient ptiysfological ctiaracteristics and on
tfae mother's specific requirements from ttiem.
Ann and Grace decided to go it on ttieir own.
Seeking a donor candidate was a major obstacle.
Since t h ^ dkbi't know any men intimately, asking tfaeir acquaiiMances constituted a considerable
risk. A man might ctioose to emtiarniss ttiem,
bbckmail tliem or even tiami ttiem if ttiey tiandled
tiie situation wrong.
The candklaiBS ttiey ctiose as possibilities seemed a modey crew. TSwo of tlie men demanded a
'^sdid fee." Ann and Grace bad already decided
that paying a fee was out of the question. One of
ttiem demanded that Ann sleep with him. There
was no possibility of tiiat. One asked Ann to buy
tlim erotica. Ann's politks ruled ttiat request out.
Ann and Grace had deckled that the child should
approximate both of them in skin color and
pl^ical characteristics. The last candidate,
myself, ttie only gay man, met those criteria
almost to a tee.
I had known them socially through the locai
women's coffeehouse and bookstore. Though 1 fit
several of ttieir criteria for a donor, asking me
was the biggest obstacle in their path. They were
especially concerned that I would misunderstand
their intent. Fortunatciy for all of us, I had just
finished reading, "Our Bodies, Ourselves" and
had learned a great deal about women's reproductive issues, including artificial insemination.
Ann chose to take me out to dinner and over
a glass of champagne made ttie proposal. Naturally, I was taken by surprise. What an honor! My
respect for Ann and Grace skyrocketed that evening. But the real work lay ahead.
First I had a complete physical, including the
HIV test. I signed a statement that I tested negative
and that I was in otherwise good health. They
signed a counterstatement promising never to
reveal my HIV status.
A detailed questionnairefollcwved.Details ranged from my sexual preference to my diet. A complete medical history was an important part of ttie
document. "Just in case," Ann said. The actual
negotiations l^egan afier the two women had
reviewed ttie questionnaire and were satisfied with
ttie answers. Our discussions centered around ttie
process by which each party tiad come to decide
on participating in amateur inseminatfon.
Ttie sourcebook A Legal Gmdefi>r Lesbian and
Gay Couples provided us with ttie necessary
paperwork to complete ttie transaction. Ttie state
where we Uved tiad some unusual laws regarding
adoption and surrogacy, so ttie three of us decided to engage an attorney. Stie had handled several
adoption cases and was completely fomiliar with
the state's laws on parenting. Stie helped us to
work out an amiable solution to the problems of
custody, visitation and support.
Ann and Grace lx)th preferred ttiat ttiey become
the sole guardians for the child. I was more than
tuq)py to oblige ttiem. I was not ready at that point
to parent a child. We agreed that the child would
never know I was the biological father except in
ttic case of an extreme medical emergency requiring ttiat I donate an organ or that my medical
history be examined. They graciously offered to
allow me any visitation rights 1 wanted, provided
I never reveal my status. I chose to turn ttiem
down. Instead, I would remain a friend of theirs
and would only see the child if they were willing
and present.
Ttie mechanical aspects of insemination were
more tedious ttian complicated. Ann had a twoday window in which stie could conceive. Stie had
ctiarted tier cycle during a five-month period and
could tell almost to the minute tier optimum time.
Durii^ ttie two or ttiree days previous to zero liour
stie took her temperature every two liours (a
woman's body temperature rise at optimum conception time) to make certain ttiat ttie time would
l>e right. sem*n is viable for only 15 minutes out-
skie ttie human body.
Everythii^ had to work smoottily to make ttie
insemination possible. V4e had worked out a plan
wtiereby stie would call my answering machine
and give me a time wtien I would need to be ready.
As it was, it took several monthly attempts and
several tries each month to get it right. I also
avoided masturbating or tiaving sex for about a
week before Ann's time to insure ttie higtiest quality and quantity of sem*n possible. When at last
everything worked out as expected, I was gratetiil
for the opportunity to rest from ttie stress of having tc perform on cue.
Wlien Ann became pregnant, medical reports
came frequemly in the form of postcards
decorated with cribs, diapers and a small but unmistakable turkey baster. As the date approached, I bought a small teddy t>ear as a gift to the
child. Ttiough I would never tiave a part in raising tier (we now knew her sex through ultrasound
and amniocentesis), I felt great pride in what little contribution I had made to the cause.
As the birth date approached I was making
preparations to move. I ttiought I would probably
never know the baby's status, but I would carry
in my mind an image of two caring, loving
mothers who tiad shown me a new side of life 1
never imagined I would experience. I left the city where 1 lived to move lo Roctiester, not knowing any details about the birth. Wlien I arrived
here, a small card containing a pink ribbon and
an invitation to dinner greeted me. Ttiank ttie goddesses for a safe birth. 1 tiaven't taken Ann and
Grace up on their invitation. Some day I will, and
1 will see wtiat cooperation and miracles can do.
Fran and Sue: Coming out
as prospective parents
By Micfaele Moore
Wticn she came out as a lesbian several years
ago, Fran, a 28-year-old Roctiesterian said, stie
decided stie couldn't have children. But now Fran
and Sue, her lover of five years, are planning to
have a baby via artificial insemination.
Ttie two of ttiem have been considering tiaving
a child for a couple of years, and plan to start the
insemination process in Ms^, affer Fran finisties
graduate sctiool. Sue, wtio is 35, said recentiy slie
chose to become pregnant because of a desire to
tiave tier own child, a desire ttiat's gotten stronger
as she grows older.
"I think part of it is to fulfill a nurturing instinct ttiat I tiave," Sue said. "I've ttiought about
it for a long time, and I realize now ttiat it's possibfe."
Although ttiey both like children, discovering
ttiey wanted to tiave a child of their own was a
gradual process, Fran said.
"When I realized I was a lesbian, I shut down
all of nty instincts to become a parent," stie said.
"Wlien Sue's biofogical clock started ticking
down, and stie tiad this strong uige to l?ecome a
parent, we son of re-evaluated it, and saw ttiat
tliere's no reason we can't t>e parents. Ws just
followed our instincts "
l^ut ofttie process of consj^ring tiaving a baby
has been gening to know more tieterosexual
couples with children. Sue and Fran said. They
often care for a friend's three-year-old son.
"Ws very consciously have incorporated more
tieterosexual couples into our lives, and we've also
played with their children and tieen involved with
ttieir children, and tiave realized ttiat, while we
were really into ttie gay commimity, we rarely saw
children," Fran said. "And so once we became
exposed to children again, we saw something
missing in our lives. Wt didn't know wtiat was
missing, really, or weren't as aware of it until we
met people who tiad children."
Ttie two women decided to use artificial insemination because Sue didn't want to tiave sexual intercourse with a man, and because of ttie
difficulty involved in adopting a child, especially as leslMans.
Ttiey also wanted to raise a child from birth,
Fran said.
"Ws wanted an infont, t>ecause we believe ttiat
once a child is more ttian two or ttiree, so much
of wtiat ttiat child is goiiig to be tias lieen estatilished," stie sakl. "And Sue and I tiave very similar
values, and we'd want to instill our values into
our child."
Fran and Sue elected not to use an artificial insemination clinic affer hearing stories of lesbians
wtio tiad encountered tiomophobia in such plaoes.
They've chosen to do the insemination
ttiemselves, but tiave been getting tietp from Sue's
doctor, a local obsletrician-gyneoofogist. Ttie doctor knows ttiey are lestnans; this is tlie first time
stie tuis worked with two women wtio are using
the insemination process.
"I just can't believe tiow supportive my doctor's been," Sue sakl.
Tliey considered using sperm from an
anonymous donor, but finally decided to work
with a close friend, because ttieir child might
someday want to know wtio ttie foctier was and
because it was important to ttiem ttiat ttie donor
tiave values and temperament similar to ttieirs.
But because ttiey know ttie fotlier, ttie legal
issues are more difHcult, ttiey said. Fran and Sue
warned to legally proiect themselves and ttie
fottier, but their Umvyer told them that under ttie
law, tlic fottier can give xtp his visitation rights,
but not his obligatfon lo financially support tlie
chikl. Ttie lawyer also sakl ttiat any sort of personal contract the tliree of them made would probably not be honored by the courts.
"It wasn*t too king ago that we went to the
lawyer," Frui sakl. "And all three of us went, and
it was a m l affftrming experience, because we
realized we trust each other, and we don't need
a legal document to prove that."
"She (die lawyer) sakl. I f you can do diis
witfaout getting tfae courts involved, more power
to you,"* Sue added.
They will use the court system to ensure that
Fran has legal guardianship of ttie child, and
ttiey'll specify in their wills ttiat custody goes to
ttie surviving partner.
Ttie two vMimen said ttie tiealth issues connected
with artificial insemination were not a concem
for them. Sperm donors are screened for sexually transmitted diseases, and ttieir friend is at very
low risk for AIDS.
But tliey've tiad to think about ottier problems
tliat heterosexual couples never tiave to consider,
such as how to deal with ttie tiomoptiobia ttieir
child will encounter.
"I can't be a Bollyanna—our child's prot>ably
going to foce a lot of prejudice from society at
laige, is going to be foced with situations ttiat
ocher kids don't foce," Fran said. "Our society
is filled with tiatred and prejudice, so our kid's
going to leam real fost. And tiopefiilly we will
model to our child tiow to deal with diat and liow
to live with it, on a daily basis—ttiat you just tiave
to go on, you tiave to decide ttiat you*re OK and
you don't tiave to prove ttiat to anyliody else."
Recent changes in the majority of fornilies in
this country may make their child feel less out
of place, she added.
"Feopfe think ttiat die Anierican fomily is a
mom, a dad, two kids and a dog, and ttiat's just
not nm/any more. A's single ptttmtts, it'safather,
it's two people living together who aren't mar^
ried, it's serial petfple who comte m tmd ota af
tkehtmse. SotMtrkkl'sJiistgt>ittgtobetmemt>re
who has a dtj/erettt kittd efjatnilyi"
The most't&fficmlt parts cf their ttecisitm to httve
a baity ittvolved their tmm ftuiuUes, they said.
Site's HUither tloesn't ttpptaye, attd site httsn't yet
told her fdtiter she's a lesbitm.
The wtmten are hopeful tlutt dteir son or
daugiuer H«I/ ite ettsity accepted into their extetuied famiUes. Sue's siblings hujw of tite wottten's
tkcisitm atui are supportive—iter sister-in-law
even told a relucuttu Fttm several years ago tiutt
site siiotdd support Sue's desire to iiave a diild.
Frietuh ttt Digtuiy/httegrity, die loatl orgattiztt'
tkm Jbr gay Catholics and Episcopttiittns, ttte ttlso
supportive, as are tiieir iieterosexutdfrietids. The
ttidiier of die tiuee-year-tM tiiey Itttitysit stud siie
wtnild ratiier leave iter stm with tiiem dum with
many tniier people, Fhm said.
Some cf die issues tiiey've considered are
typical for tmy couple ptmdering parentiiood—
how die pttrttier wiio dtiesn 'l ^i vr birth will bond
with the baby, tiie dumge in ititerests and limits
an sptmttmeity and tiie attumtu of free time tiiey'll
imve, iur^ to tttake joint dietHsiotis about
c o n t i n u e d o n p a g e 14
• kk.;^—&..
14
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Group offers support to gay fathers
By Miles Stunit
*The common bond among us is not just that
we're gay men, txit ttiat all ofus are also fothers."
This special bonding is die central lixus of a tmique support group which is completing its second
series oi meetings this month.
The Gay Fathers' Group (GFG) was fonned to
meet the special needs c€ gay men who are no
lotiger living with their wives l>in who have continuing strong conunitments to ttieir children.
Some groi^ meinbers tiad found support and solkl
new friendships in an existing group for married
men who were gay, t>ut because ttieir marriages
were ending, ttiat group was no longer appropriate
for ttiem. Ttie logical step was to begin a new
Oiganization to meet tlie special needs of ttiese
men, so ttie Gtty Fattiers* Group was initiated in
die fell of 1987.
Enthusiasm for the initial series of six meetii^
generated a strong commitment to a second series
during ttie winter, which included a laiger
memtiership of continuing and new participants.
Spring sessions will b ^ i n soon.
I tiave lieen a memtier of ttie group since its
inception this winter, and I can speak in strotig
suppoit of the importance of the times we stiare
togedier. Once we've gotten beyond thc initial
stages of meeting new people, setting ground rules
and establishing a fonnat that assures each
member of ttie confidentiality that is essential to
us, we tiave discovered many means of mutual
support ttiat were not necessarily obviotis wtien
we began.
There is great strength in ttie diversity of our
membership that allows us to tielp each ottier in
focing new simations, and to leam from common
past experiences. We range in age from ttie 20s
through the 50s, some ofus are singfe wtiile others
are in committed relationstiips, some ended longterm marriages years ago whife ottieis are in ttie
process of separatfon, and some of us tiave adult
sons and daughters whiie ottiers tiave young
children living with us or widi cx-wivcs.
Ttiough the GFG enjoys ttie leadership of a
Jack: Two children
and too many worlds
By Jack Spula
My two children know littie about me, in different ways and for different reasons.
Ian, my six-year-old, is too young to have internalized ttic quasi-genocidal tiomoptiobia ttiat
infects tiis environment. He's old enough, ttiough,
to feel ttie pull of machismo, and consequentiy
ttie pull toward gender-stereotyping and all that
it implies. He and his friends interact mostiy
through playful brutality. Ttiey adore weapons.
In faa, ttiey seem to want to become weapons,
to judge from ttie way ttiey throw ttiemselves at
each other.
I'm afraid ttiat, in tlie t>elly of Amerika's majoritarian cult of alienation, fan's instincts may
be impaired, if not lost. In a few years tie may
not toierate me and Che world I've brought him
into—this world of ours^ that is, wfiere losre and
open affection ainong people are valued, not arlificially Unuted. He must and will develop his
own sexuality on his own terms, but I hope he*ll
value the beautiful variety of sexualities he^s been
exposed to.
But even if more, noc less oppression lies ahead
for all of us, I won't hide from my son. I've had
more ttian enough of "polite fictions."
No sooner tiave I written ttiat, ttiough, ttian I
think of just tiow different things are with my
daughter. Daria is 14 now, and stie's grown up
wittiout a very clear pfeture of wtio I am. I've seen
tier every month or two for ttie last 12 years at
her home in Utica (there are tight restrictions on
my contact with tier, as set down by her modier).
Given ttiat history—and tier mottier's gut
tiomoptiobia—comii^ out now to Daria is too
risky. I stand to lose contact with tier altogettier.
I may tiave to wait until she's grown up and on
tier own before I'll be able to tell tier much about
myself.
So these are ttie two worlds of my children
within ttie two larger worids—gay/lesbian/bisexual and "straight"—we all live in. It's too many.
I'm looking forward to living in just one world,
a loving one.
To sum up. tiere's a stioit poem ttiat my kids
probably won't read for a long while:
Future Letter to My Daugtiter and Son
I am a certain wiiy, a common
and certain way. I no longer
hide my inclusive love.
When I hid so long from myself,
I stole from you, I stofe
the truth out of the heart
of truth ttiat was owed you.
M y p o e m s , for t h e i r p a r t ,
have withlicid little.
You might already have
looked at them
with meticulous wonder.
Whatever obscurities ttiey nurture,
ttiey leave no doubt
that I love men and womyn both.
Like the black-ice tliat conies
from great cold and stillness,
they entrap a clarity
ttiat comforts ocdy as it melts.
And like men and womyn Ixith,
alone in this heavy mechanism
of a worid, ttiey release a littfe tieat
to begin thM melting.
Don't fear loving them, or
ttie lovers they name, or me.
FRAN & SUE — Cont'd from page 13
discipline.
They wonder what affect a diild will liave on
their relationship.
' 'Probably tite biggest stumbling i>lock and tite
first stumiMng block was cotdd we give up enough
of ourselves," Fran said.
' 7 wata Sue to myself* she joked. " I don't
want to share iter for 20 years."
But, Sue added, a diild would €ukl a lot to titeir
relationship,
Fhmagreed. '*h adds a wliole otiier ditnensian.
I tiiink tiutt gay and lesbian relationsiiips go
through such a different kind cf developmem,
because so mtmy of them don't have diildren.
'*Sometimes I woruler if stmte ofthe stability
in heterosexiud marriages isn't linked to tiie
duUren—ruH that titey stay togetiier bectiuse of
tite duldren, but tiutt l>eing a parem forces a
dumge. Our relationsitip itas gone tiirough rtumy
dumges^ and i titink tiie dumges it 'U go through
being a pareru will lss good ones, it'll force us
to be closer. Tol>ea gtHtd pttrent, you 've got to
work tt}getiier."
The lesbian and gay ''baity boom" is a new
piienomenon, especially in Rochester, Fran tmd
Sue said, and i t ' s a st>cial trend ^4iose titne iias
come.
"Whedier you're a person who can be a parem
or not really iias notiting to do with wiio you sleep
with," Fran said.
"With a iieterosexual couple, that's tite tiling
to do, itave diildren, that's tiie accepted tiling,
tiutt's the tiling you 're supptfsed todo," Sue said.
"Ws've iutd to taice so ntuch into cotisideration
ifefore we decided to do tliis. Wt definitely wam
a child '
Fhmagreed. "H^'vehadtofightsolianltoget
to diepoitu where we can have a diild, if nothing
else, that child's going to know it wtts warned.''
Fran and Sue would like to talk to otiier women
who have gone tiirough the artificial itisemination process. Tb get in ttmch widt tiiem, a d l
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discussion fecilitator, conversatkms go where individual needs on a particular evening may lead
us. Tliere is rarely, if ever, a lull in ttie
conversatfon.
"What kinds of t h t i ^ do you guys talk about?"
a friend recendy asked. I told him that several
of us were concmed kbout wlien, tiow, or even
if we shouki tdl our kkls we*re pt^. Several guys
were very nervous about bow tfaeir children iMxild
react wfaen thQ^ came lo visit in their dad*s new
home, particulariy if gay friends or even a lover
were present.
Several ofus trained to leam atxxit legal separatfons, helpful or noc-so-helpfiil lawyers and how
to deal with ai^ry or hun ex-wives. (One guy said
he was absolutely amazed that ttiis woman tte tiad
know and loved for so long tiad a wliole new, in*
credilriy tmstife side to tier since tlie separation,
and that tie felt as if he tiadnH really known her
at all.)
Several ofus were unsure ofhow to make new
friends in the gay worid, and tfaere were those wtio
BOB — Cont'd from
page 12
two-week vacation sailing ttie Rideau Canal in
Canada in a small boat.
His children are not afraid to show affection
toward him, Owens said, and his sons will kiss
him and hug his lover in public. But ttie kids are
reluctam to let their friends know that their dad
is gi^. This is understandable, tie said, because
t h ^ ' r e still in high school, and peer pressure is
strong.
"I just haven't confronted diat," he sakl. "If tny
kids were college students and they were still doing ttiat, we'd have to deal with it.
"I can be gay wittiout advertising it, and they
can tiave a gxQr foctier without advertising it. If
ttiey came here with a friend, I wouldn't pretend
to be something I'm not. I won't make tbem confroitt it on tfaeir faome turf, but this is my home
mrf, and Fm not going to prdend for anyone. And
chat includes future in-laws, if we get fo that
point."
Although his kids accept tbat tie*s gay, ttiat
doesn't stop tliem from acting like typicsd
teenagers at times, he said.
'^They're very polite. Tliey*ll yell, '\bu fogBot*'
and then tuni around and siy, 'Oh, cjacusc mc.
Dad."'
Owens said tiis children, who are white, attended a sctiool with a primarily black student body,
and he made efforts to raise them to accept individual differences.
"I went into parenting with ttie idea that
wliatever happens, my kids were going to come
out of ctiildlKxid as open, caring adults," he sakl.
"Maylic chat's ^otistfeal; I don't know. The
rewarding thing for me is wtien ttiey come back
with observations about life and atxxit peopfe that
reflect the vmy I like to view people."
But with the rewards have come the difficuitfes
of being a non-custodial gay fottier.
Many proMcms have been die result of his ex-
found die kfea of panknpating in openly gay social
events frightening liccause oi a strong need for
confkfentiality.
As we've grown more comfortabfe talking
together, we've felt more at ease discussing personal things. Tfae agenda keeps devefoping, as do
the friendships esUblished among group
members. Ws are noc a "dating servfoe," but die
group provkies a great opportunity to meet other
peopfe with whom we stiare common interests and
concerns. And we all agree tliat the group Is of
real value in sharing our concerns as gay parents.
One ofour goals is to make tfae GFG availidife
to new members. Membership is open at the first
meeting ttie series in order to establish consistency of
membership for ttiose ineetings.
Wc meet in a convenient downtown location,
and wotdd like to tiear from nien wtio are interested in knowing more about die GFG. For information atxmt our spring sessions, wluch b ^ i n
March 29, write to Box lOS, Victor. NY 14564.
> ^ f*ck forward to an even stroc^r group in our
future sessions.
Queer Like Me
Children are true test of love for gay couples
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By BobOwens
Sometimes I can't decide if gay Rochester is
avant-garde or so fer out-of-it that we seem atiead
of our time. For example, the general attitude of
cooperation found among gay men and lesbians
is an area jn which we seem to be going in the
right direction, aw£^ from the separatism found
elsewhere. Gay parenting is another such issue.
In a recent issue of ttie Advocate^ an article on
parenting called forth screams of disgust from
some readers and chaiges ctf "aping the breeders."
I^renting was decried as a vestige of ttie suppressionist mentality of ttie non-gay majority. I find
this view hysterical and counterproductive. In
Rochester, gay parenting seems alive and well.
hom*osexual lov&can be a very beautiful thing.
For me, this past Valentine's Day surpassed all
prevfous ones for feelings of love, sharing and caring. At speaking engagements, I tell the gays hkiden in the audtence ttiat ttiey are very special and
have a very rich and beautiful gift. Gay love can
be based not on the suppression of one sex by ttie
ottier, but rather on the love of two equals. In its
ideal form, neither hom*osexual nor heterosexual
love is inherendy better, just different. One has
only to read the latest Hite report and other
studies, tiowever, to recognize ttie unrealized
potential of Iieterosexual love.
In a relationship filled with love, it v^vwld not
be unusual to have the participants want to stiare
ttieir love with anottier. Ottier adults are a
possibility. Children, on the ottier tiand, offer a
special ctiallenge. In ttie process of raising a chtM,
tlie "parents" can see tlie results of ttieir love in
ttie child's attitudes and actions. Ttie malleable
child raised in ttie atmosphere of love can offer
back a minor of that love.
Heterosexuals are often called upon to tiave
children in order to legitimize dieir relationship
or to prove ttieir sexuality. "Be fruitful and multiply," they are reminded by ttie new fundamentalist
"fethers" and the scribes of old. The ancient
Hebrew word for "taking up tbe sword" and "propogation" are the same. Families demand to know
from ttie newlyweds when tlie children will come.
As hom*osexuals, most of us tiave ctiosen to
withdraw from such proofe of fidelity or sexuality or from childbearing as an extension of foreign
or religious policy. Sexual activity and procreation are not inextricably linked for the gay or lesbian couple. The sexual pleasure of our partner
tx^omes its own justification as an act of love.
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Ttierefore, childl>earing and/or childrearing
tiecome for ttie gay or lesbian couple a tnie test
of love, an extensfon of the love that tliey stiare.
This is not "aping breeders." Our tiodies are
similar to ttiose of tieterosexuals, but otir justifications for children can be very different. >\^ are
not forced to have children in order to uphold or
dismiss anyone's model of wtiat we should be as
gay and lesbian adults.
One personal problem I tiave tiad understanting queens and Clones is that to me ttiey represent fulfillment and rejection of the g;ay
stereotypes tield by non-gays. Both reflect permitting non-gays to "set ttie agenda" and to control
us either by saying wtiat we will be or by
establishing the stereotype to which we will react.
Either one robs our comunity of its own identity
and initiative. I am me, unique, and I represent
but a tiny fraction of ttie diversity ttiat is ttie gsty
community. Parenting sliould be seen as anottier
mark of ttiat diversity and as a potentially
beautiful fulfillment of ttie love of some gay and
lesbian couples. As a couple, two men or women
can decide to have children for the right reasons,
to share a very special gift.
L£gal Affairs
okfer.
**Th^ were ready for a parent-ectoiny mfymfV
Owens sakl. 'Ttiey wanted to be with their
friends, not ttieir parents."
The divorce has lieen tiarder on his children
ttian dealing with his gayness. Owens said, and
his absence has tieen partictdariy difHctdt for
them because he was close to them and was quite
involved in their upbringing.
He believes there are several reasons some noncustodial g ^ fothers claim tfaey're more nurturing parents.
"Some of it is iMcause we're more sensitive;
some of it ts rationalization because we don^t have
the kid any more," tie said. "It makes us feel lietter. It makes me feel t>etter."
Owens said the recem movement or trend of
fesbians and gay men having children on ttieir
cNvn, outskfe of tieterosexual marriage, is "great."
He and tiis Xtffct have discussed caring for a foster
child, possibly an older child, a t u n a v ^ or a gi^
teenager—someone who lias nowhere to go, they
said.
"As a child I always thought about having
children, t>ut the wife was always some son of
vague figure," Owens said. "I ttunk tliere's just
a very strong nurturing instinct in maiiy of us.
Biologically, anyone can be a parenc, buc I chink
it's die special nurturing quality of many gay people dial make ttiem particulariy suited for parenting."
15
Columnists
•
wife trying to make visitation arrangements as diffictdt as possil^ for him. And at first, his lover
felt guilty ttiat Owens was leaving his fomily to
be with him.
"Initially, I think it was difficidt for him fo accept diat there were kkls and that I had teft ttiem,"
Owens sakl.
He delil>erately waited until the cliildren were
in junfor high school before he left, believing ttiat
tlie divorce wotdd he easier for them as ttiey got
EMPTY CLX>SET
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Reservations accepted
Making
health care
decisions
By Rfehanl D. Lambom
This article is not intended to be individual legal
advice; you should consult an attorney alwut your
situation. Comments arui questions are imited and
encourged.
Karen Thompson and Stiaron Kowalski are
lovers. In 1983, after they had been togedier for
four years, Stiaron was in an automobile accklent
and was left paralyzed and brain-damaged.
Stiaron's fettier took legal chaige of tier and lias
prevented Karen from visiting.
This tragic situation dramatically sliows tiow
ttie law can injure gay and lesbian couples. Wtien
I first read about it, I started to think of ways to
protect ourselves. Ttiere are legal tools wc can
use so that tlie law will tielp us instead of hurt
us. Here is one.
A conservator is someone appointed lo take care
of your money and ottier property if 3^ou are not
able to do so. New York state law says tliat ifyou
nominate someone lo be your conservator, a court
should appoint that person. An attorney can tielp
you prepare a statement ttiat you want your partner to be your conservator.
\bu can also nominate someone to tie your
guardian. A guardian is appointed to take care
of you ptiysically in ttie event you cannot take care
of yourself. Again, a court will give preference
lo ttie person you nominate, and an attorney can
tielp you prepare this document.
A third document you can use to support your
relationship in the event of bad tiealth is a durabfe
power of attorney for health decisfons. You can
use such a power of attorney to appoint your partner as ttie peison to make health care decisions
if you cannot make them yourself.
Some of us rememlier our parents signing a
similar power of atiomey when we were children
and went off to summer camp, in case we needed medfoal treatment when our parents could not
consent to it.
During the past few months, I liave written
atXNit a nuinber of ways the law can tie used to
lielp our relationships:
YMI can use a dur^ife power of attorney so ttiat
you partner can act for you in executing
documents r^arding you propeity and money. But
tie careful if you are worried about your partner
taking your property against your will.
I^rtners can haw a writien contract statii^ how
they will deal with their property whife they are
togettier and tiow tlieir property will be divkfed
if they part.
\bu can use gifts, joint tenancy, trusts and wills^
lo distribute your property when yoa dfe.
Remember these terms: nomination of conser^«lor and guardian, durabfe power of atiomey for
health care decisions, durabfe power of attorney,
partner property contracts, gifts, joint tenancy,
trusts and wills. Good luck!
•>^ •nunt.LJii iiiMi
16
—
imiP
III
' l n n i illT
* •J'.HiWiii M l
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
Match 1. 1988
A I D S Update
Advfee for Life: A Woman's Guide to AIDS
Risks and Preventfon (Norwood)
B.A, A: "Full of good information; good for both
women and men."
AIDS: A Catholk CaU for Compassfon (Flynn)
A,B: "Compassionate and very Catholic."
AIDS: A Gnkfe to Survival (Tatchell) Alternative
approaches to healing.
B,C.
AIDS: A Self-Care Manual (AIDS Project L A .
- Moffen et al.)
A.A,C+:" A very interesting lHX>k Imt much insingle best book for both PWAs, and people
around them."
AIDS and the Church (Shelp and Sunderland)
CB.
AIDS and the Law: A guide tor the public,
(Harlon Dalton, Scott Burns, and thc Ykfe AIDS
Law Project, pb, $7.95> Do not confuse with
another book with a similar title.
A,A,A: ^'Excellent for those to wtiom it is
directed, very accessibly written."
The AIDS Book: A INisitive Approach (Hay)
A controversial alternative approach to tiealing by
a well-known writer.
C,C: "Blames person with illness but lias some
useful information." B: "Excellent for ttiose who
believe in trust and alternative therapies."
AIDS: Cause and Solutfon: The Macrobiotk
Approach to Natiu^ Iminunity (Kushi and Cottrell with Mead and Muto)
D,B.
The AIDS Epidemk (Slaff and Bnibaker)
General information.
B,C.
AIDS: Facts and issues (Gong and Rudnick)
A,B; "Comprdiensive collection of atticfes, some
a bit outdated." B: "Slightly outdated, still the
l>est general l>ook."
AIDS: In Search of a Killer (UA^rt)
A: "Gives sense of the personal tragedy as well
as medical and political issues."
AIDS In the Mind of America (Alunan)
A: "Excellent evaluation of AIDS* impact on
Ainerican thought." A,A,B.A: "Excellent
histoiy." B: "Good history."
AIDS: I^rsonal Stories in Aistoral Perspective
(Stielp. Sunderland, and Mansell)
,
A,B: "One of die few bookw to discuss all AIDS
groups—wotnen, children, &eys^ tiemopbiliacs."
C: "Interesting stories tnit poorly written."
AIDS: P r i n d p k s , Practices and Palitics (Corless and Pittman-Lindeman, eds.)
C
AIDS: The Deadly Epidemic (Hanco*ck and
Carim) Medical.
C F : "hom*ophobic tone."
AIDS: Tbe Myitery M d the SoltitkMi (Cantwetl)
A controversial medkal theory of AIDS.
C D : "Unorthodox proposal for AIDS as
bacteria."
AIDS: The Spiritnal
Christian perspective.
(Fortunato)
B: "Will be very helpfut for many with strong
religious backgrounds." C,B,C: "Personal
religious musings; some will like h."
AIDS: What Does It Mean to \bu?: Revised
Eilitfon (Hyde and Forsyth) For young adults.
A,B.
AIDS: The Workplace Issues (American
Management Association Research Staff)
B: "Good for business-related questions, but
dated." C,C: "Good but dated."
AIDS: You Can't Catch It Holding Hands
(Sainte-Phalle) Illustrated, seems to be for lx>th
children and adults.
A,C; "Awfully judgmental about sex, not al all
gay-pdsilive." A: "Really for adults and older
teens." B: "Beautiful art, probably too explicit
for most parents lo give to their children."
And the Band Played On (Shilts) Too new to
have been included on the list wc originally sent
out, but some people sent comments from advance galleys or material itiey had seen. This is
clearly going to be a controversial and widelyread title.
A, A: "Selling very well; reports of disturbingly
many inaccuracies."
As Is (Hoffman) Drama.
A.
The Condom Boole: The Essential Guide for
Men and WDinen (Everen and Glanz)
B,C: "Functional"
Confronting AIDS: Directfons for Publk
Health, Health Care and ReseanJi. (Inst, of
Medicine, National Academy of Science)
A': "Especially informative in regards to fiiture
policy-making."
Coping with AIDS (Kurland) Young adult.
C C : "Sketchy."
Mobllizfaig Against AIDS: The Unfinished
' Story ofa Virus (Institute of Medicine/National
Academy of Scfences)
B,A,B: "Great except for safe-sex guidelines are
sometimes a bit vague." C: "Afeiy medical, a bit
old, useful history."
Night Kites (Kerr) YA fiction.
A,A.
The Normal Heart (Kramer) Drama.
A: "Gut-wrenching." A: "A very popular play on
early AIDS education and experiences of gay
men."
One Day at a Time: A Personal Guide to Coping with a Terminal Diagnosis (Nungesser)
(Not yet published, but initial expectations from
several people are that this will be good.)
The Plague Ybirs: A Chronkie of AIDS, the
Epitfemk of Our Times (Black)
B,F: "Tliere's some awful lx>oks out there, and
this is one of itiem." D: "Very dated, marred by
die author's own fears, some incorrect info." F:
"Spiteful, stupid and hom*ophobic."
Psychoimmunity and the Healing Process: A
Holistic Approach to Immunity and AIDS
(Serinus, ed.)
B: "Sells well." B: "CSood overview of alternatives." D: "Tends to blame ttie person with
AIDS."
Questions and Answers on AIDS (Frommin and
Leonard)
A: "\fery fact-oriented; no opinfons are offered."
A: "Fast and fecttial."
Safe Sex (Scotti and Moore) Non-fiction.
C.
Safe Sex (Fierstein) Fiction/drama.
A: "Good fbr attitude change." C,E: "Doesn't
read well."
An Epidendc of Courage: Facing AIDS in
America (Nungcsscr)
B,B: "Brings AIDS to life." B: "A very readable
littfe book."
Safe Sex in a Dangerous Vkx%A (Ufene) General
safe-sex information.
C B : "Uniealistically conservative in promoting
abstinence."
The Essential AIDS Eact Boole: What \bu Need
to Know to Protect ^burself, \ b u r Eamily, All
your Loved Ones (Douglas and Pinsky)
B,B,C: "Some information in wrong."
Safe Sex in the Age of AIDS (Instimte for die
Advanced Study of Human Sexuality)
B,B,C: "Good basic cheap book."
Goodbye, I Love \ b u : The IVue Story of a
Wife, Her hom*osexual Husbanil—and a Love
Honored for Time and All Eternity (Pearson)
A,B: "Compassfonate Story, excellent for straight
readers."
Good-Bye Tomorrow (Miklowitz) YA fiction
about a popular high school senior who contract
AIDS from a blood transfusion.
C,B: "Good." A: "Frank and sensitive."
Healing AIDS Naturally (Badgley)
A,A: "W^ get good reports on this from PWAs."
B.
Hot Living (Preston) Explicit safe-sex stiort
stories.
B: "Ahead of its time." B,B.
How to Persuade Your Lover to Use a Cond o m . . .and Why \ b u Should (Breitman, Reed,
and Knutson)
B,B: "Great negotiating info." B: "Sprigtttly, very
gay-positive,
easy
to
read."
June MaU (Wambold) Fiction.
C D ; "Boring story."
Living with AIDS (O'Connor)
A: "Sensible advice *about alternative tiealth
strategies." B+B: "Suport and self-help for
PWAs, well-written."
Love, Metttdne & Miracles: Lcsaons Leamed
About Sdf-Healfaig from a Surgeon** Experience with Esceptionnl AitienU (Siegel)
A: "But not much about AIDS." C B : "But only
one chapter on AIDS."
Safe Sex: The Ultimate E r o t k Guide (Preston
and Swann) Safe-sex informatfon in an erotic
cor^text.
A,B,B: "Sells well." B,A,B: "Silly but sensibfe
and popular."
SafeStud (Exander) A gay man comes to terms
with the need for safe-sex; explkidy erotic.
B,B: "Becoming more popular."
Sex and Germs (Panon)
A,A,C»: "A very interesting book but much infiuenced by die audior's political a^nda." C:
"Good analysis btxx hasn*t worn well."
Sex Care: The CompMe Guitte to Safe and
Healthy Sex (Covington and McClendon)
CB.
Sex, Drugs and AIDS (Wachter) For younger
readers.
CC: "Slight, but a fine starter." A: "But could
be more sex-positive."
Sex Stuff: A Book of Practkal Informatkm &
Ideas for Kids 7-17, and Thehr Teachers and
ftuients (Marsh)
C.
Stay Safe (Mandel and Mandel) General safe-sex
information.
CD.
A S t r a n g e Virus of Unknown Origin
(Leit>owitch)
C,B: "Good early epidemiological history,
beautifully written."
Strategic for Survival: A Gay Men's Gealth
Manual for the Age tA AIDS (Goldblum and
Delan^).
C
Superimmuidty (Pearsall).
B.
I b All the Girls I've Loved Before: An AIDS
Wary (Money) Personal essays by a PWA.
A: 'tumorous, really personalizes AIDS issues."
C»
they are killing us
and we are
letting them.''
Dr. wyngaaiden reports to Dr. Windom, wlio
reports to Dr. Bowen, who reports to thc
A: "Vsry good gay novel about a man and his dying lover; it's a laugh-thfough-the-tears t)ook."
Understanding AIDS (Lemer) Young-adult.
C,B: "Excellent but not in-depth."
When Someone Ybu Know Has AIDS: A Practical Guide (Martelli with I^ltz and Messina)
A , A C A : "Essential and practical." A: "Practical and personal."
When Someone \bu Love Has AIDS: A Book
of Hope for Eamily and Friends (Moffett)
B,B: "A bit less practkal than When Someone Hbu
Know Has AiDSr F: "Tends to blame die person with AIDS for their illness."
Home of
the
Big Shots
. Wa«kly Sp«el«ls:
Monday —
Domestic Beer, Wine &
.
Schnapps »1 from 10-2
Tuesday - See Dale run
from 7-2
Thursday - 2 fori from 10-2
Saturday - 2 for 1 from 3-9
Home of the
Rochester fiams
onn
4 4
Tweeds (Graham) Fiction.
nally Spttdalss
*<3 for 2 " f r o m 1-7
32&6e30
I am here to tell you that I know more about
AIDS ttian any of these fbur inhumane men, and
that any one of you here who lias AIDS or who
tends to someone who lias AIDS, or who reads
all the newqiapers and watcties TV, knows more
about AIDS thaa ttiese four monsters. And they
are the four f*ckers who are in ctiaige of AIDS
for your govenunent—ttie bureaucrats who tiave
the ultimate control over your life.
Next I went to the Natfonal Institutes of Health.
Ttie Natfonal Institutes oi Health receives $6.2
billfon each and every year to look after the tiealth
af the Anierican people. ' T o improve ttie health
ofttie Ainerican peopfe" is tiow the U.S. govemment manual describes the NIH's mission.
How many of you can tell me the name of the
head of die NIH?
\bu don't know the name of the man who is
given $6i2 billion each and eveiy year to tielp
make you t)etter if you have AIDS? You stiould
The IVuth About AIDS (Fettner and Check)
General information.
B,B.A,D: "Good early book, now dated."
Serenity (Reed) New, therefore not seen yet by
many people.
A: "An inspiratfonal but stricdy non-religious approach to ctiangii^ sexual lifestyles."
1065 Main St. East
By Larry Kramer
The folUtwing Is tiie conclusitm of a speech
Lany Kramer tielivered at a rally in Boston
preceding dtat dty's June 1987 gay pride celebrtttitm. His speech has been reprinted ntttionally,
raisitig a great deal cf ctmtroversy wlierever it *s
been read. Tfie Empty Chset has mixed feelings
abtMtt what Kramer is saying, but we reprim his
remarks in their enti^iety here, because Kramer
raises a h t cf issues that itave ruH been in tite
fifr^fivnt ofthe discussion cftiie AIDS epidemic.
The first part ofKratner 's speech wtts published
in tite February issue cf the Empty Closet
bt astiamed of yourselves.
His name is Dr. James Wyngaaiden and tie tias
never been tieard to publicly ^leak out alxnit
AIDS, eittier. He is given $6L2 inllion every year,
and not only doesn't tie speak out about AIDS,
Imt you don't even know his name!
\bu Can Heal Vbur Life {Ha^) A controversial.
well-known alternative therapy approach.
C: "Blames person with illness, but has some
value." F: "Misleading, poor approach, often
causes gudt in reader." B: "Excellent for ttiose
who believe in such ttierapies." "Sells very well."
A.
The Screaming Room: A Mother's Journal of
Her Son's Struggfe with AIDS (Peabody)
A: "Sells very well." A: "essential reading, immensely educational." A: "N%ry moving."
LoveSec (Exander) Explkit erotka about kive and
safe sex.
B,B: "Becomii^ more popular."
Mnximtim Immunity (Weiner)
B.
17
30,000 and counting ... fighting for our lives
A guide to books about AIDS
By Sasha Alyson, Alyson PubUcations
This bibliography was put togettier as a way of
tielping booksellers who feel swamped by the
numt>er of AIDS titles being published. Working from several sources, most notable the
bibliography ttiat appeared in Publishers Weekly
a few months ago, I put together a compretiensive listing of titles, and asked staff memt)ers at
three g ^ txiokstores and three AIDS organizations to rate each title, adding comments as they
wanted.
Bc»oks that seemed most likely to be considered
by a typical bookseller are listed alphabetically
by title. On the next line are the ratings (A is best,
F is worst) and comments. If there's only one
rating for a title, that means only one of the six
sources was fomiliar enough with the book to rate
it. Books with five or six ratings are among the
best-known ofthe titles. Ratings refer to content,
not sales potential: comments mjy refer to either
This listing will be updated periodically. To obtain a copy, wrile to Alyson Publications, 40
Plympton St.. Boston, MA 02118.
EMPTY CLOSET
•
Presklem.
Ttie NIH is like a college campus. It looks like
Amtierst, or like somediing from an okl MGM
muskal. It's really made up of 12 insdtutes, wtikh
are sort of like dorms, or fratemitics, all part of
ttie wliofe. Ttie grounds are manicured and you
cant see any sh*t on ttie groimd.
Seven yean ago, wtien AIDS was first noticed, and you would think tlie NIH woidd tiave
jumped on it fast, this is wtiat happened. >bu
would think ttiat, because ttiere was a cancer involved, called Kaposi's sarcoma, it stiould tiave
gone to ttie itistitute in ctiaige of cancer, the National Cancer Instimte of the National Instimtes
of Health. The National Cancer Institute is ttie
richest fiafeemity at NIH. In 1981, when AIDS first
sho««d up and stioidd have gone into this rich
fraternity, ttie head of ttie fraternity didn't want
it. He had one billfon dollars of research money
**to improve the health of the American people,"
and die head of die NIH dkhi't want it.
Now liow many of you can tell me tlie name
ofthe head of die NCI, then and now? Ttie man
wtio is in ctiarge oi the most important cancer
research institute in the entire worid, and you
don't know his name? \bu stiould be astiamed of
yourselves.
His name is Dr. Vincent T. Devita, and I have
it on good authority that he is gay. In I9S1, he
dkta't want AIDS. He didn't like die smell of it,
and didn't want to spend any of his institute's $1
billfon on it, so he too passed the buck.
Dr. Devita r^xirts to Dr. Wyngaarden, who
reports to Dr. Windom, who reports to Dr.
Bcwen, who reports to die Preskfent
Dr. Devita passed tlie buck to a poor relation,
a much small institute named ttie Natfonal Instimte of Alfergies and Infiectfous Diseases ofthe
National Instimtes of Health, whkh had a budget
one-fourth die size of tiis and whkh was not neariy
so popular a fnuemity to rush. It. was then run
fay a man named Rkhard Krause, who dkln't want
AIDS, either. Dr. Rkhard Krause is also a g ^
man. He subsequendy les^ned as head of NIAIIX
and he was replaced by—now I am sure you can
tell me the name a i the man is now the director
of NIAUX die man who reports to Dr. Windom
wbo reports to Dr. Bowen who repons to the
Piatident—the s i i ^ e most important name in
AIDS today, the name ofthe man who probatdy
has roore ^fect on your future than anybody else
in tiie iMorkl.
Hew many of you know this man's name?
His name is Dr. Anthoiiy FMici. He's real cute.
He*s an Italian from Brooklyn, shon, slim, compact. He wears aviator glasses; a nany dresser,
a vety enetyetk and dynamk man. Affer a re-
cent meeting a twnch of us from New \brk had
with him, during whkh atisolutely nothing was
accomplished, he asked me what we thought of
die meeting. I told him: '^Everyone diought you
were real cute." And he-blushed to die roots.
\bu are smiling, and this is the man who is not
spending ttiose $47 tniWitm—wiiich were given to
ium specific€dly to test AIDS drugs.
Everybody likes Dr. Fauci and everybody
diinks Dr. Fauci is real cute, including me, and
every scfentific person I spoke to whispers off to
the skfe, "Yes, he's real cute, but he's in a way
over his tiead."
Dr. Fauci is an ambitfous bureaucrat who is thc
recipfent of all the buck passing and dumping-on
fiom all ofthe above. He staggers, without complaint, under his heavy load. No loudmouth Dr.
Koop is tie.
Dr. Fauci, with his devoted staff of several
dozen—ttiat's right, folks, no more ttian a coupfe
of dozen doctors and sciendsts are fighting against
AIDS at NIAID; I guess $47 miUion doesn't buy
wtiat it used to buy—is chief administrator of the
19 AIDS designated treatment units around the
countiy, and of all AIDS research and testing for
ttie entire countiy. No major decisfon can be made
wittiout him. He works 18-hour days, goes into
ttie wards after office hours to visit patients, his
wife is an AIDS nurse in his hospital, he must
summon committees, preside ever meetings,
supervise the selection of drugs to test, monitor
ttie results, deal with pharmaceutical companies,
keep up on the latest infonnation (a new drug application can nm up to lOOjOOO pages of evidence),
attend conferences all over the world, and put up
with complaints from al>solutely eveiyone.
Dr. Fauci, of all ttie names in this article, is
certainly not the enemy. Because he is not, and
liecause I think tie does care, I am even more
angry at him for wtiat he is not doing—no matter
wtiat his excuses, and tie tias many. Instead of
screamii^ and yelling for tielp as loud as tic can,
he tries to make do, to make nice, to negotiate
quiedy, to assuage. An ambitious bueaucrat
doesn't make waves.
Yss, Dr. Fauci reports to Dr. >^i^aarden, wtio
reports to Dr. Windom, wtio reports to Dr.
Bowen, wtio reports to ttie President.
Dr. Fauci lias had this $47 million for a year—
and worse, the beds in their AIDS watds are empty. A wlM>le fioor in Americans state-of-tlie-art
tiospital, $47 million given him to test new
treatments, and tiis tieds are empty, just as the majority of places on ttie treatnient protocols of ttiose
19 ATEUs around die countiy are empty.
Wtiat is going on tiere? Are tliey actually afraid
ttK^ might leara something ttiat might save us?
Researeh at NIH? I tiave not ttie space to go
into ttie gory details. Let me just say ttiat ttie
research rivalries in and amot^ all the insUmtes
at NIH could make a TV series to rival Dynasty
and Falcon Crest in coti^ieUtiveness, hostility,
"Half the men reading
this could be dead
in five years.''
selfishness, and greed. (Why doesn't the press
write about these scandals, as they do alxMit all
the otti^af? Wti^ doesn't ttie press ever investigate
NIH? Is it so holy—like die Vttkan?)
Now you know wtiy NIH stands for Not Interested in hom*osexiMls.
If I use gross, revolting language—go ahead,
be offended—Idon't know how else to reach you,
how to reach everybody. I tried starting an
ofganizatkm. I co-founded Gay Mens Health
Crisis, whkh tiecomes more timki as it tiecomes
richer day by day. I tried wridng a play. I tried
writii^ endless artkles in the Native and the New
York Tunes and Newsday and screaming on
Dtmahue and in front of every TV camera put
in front of me. I helped start ACT UP, a small
btmch of too few very courageous people willing
to make rude noises. I don't know what else to
do to wake you up.
I will tell you something else, to try and wake
you up: If AIDS does not spread out wkfely into
the white non-dnig-using heterosexual populatfon,
as it nuy or may not do, then die white non-drugusing populatfon is going to hate us even more—
for scarify diem, for cosdng diem a f*ckii^ forttuie, fior our "lilcstyfe," whkh dicy siy caused
this. AIDS will stay a disease of Macks and
Hispanks and g i ^ and it will continue to tie ignored. It will be even more ignored.
The straight worid is scared now because
diey're worried k's going lo happen to diem. What
if it doesn't? Think about diat for a whife. If all
dus fethaigy is going oo now, diink whia will happen then, just as you are coming down with it and
&cing death.
Who is fighting back in aiiy and all of this?
1\venty-foiir million giy men and lesbians in this
country, and who is f^hting back? We have a
demonstration in Wuhington and we have 300
peopfe and we think we're lucky. V^ get our pktures in all the magazines and newspapers for one
or two days and we fieel real proud. Sixty thousand Cadwlks march in Albany; 250^000 Jews
march in New \brk against the treattnent of Soviet
Jews; one milUon peopfe march for nuclear
disarmament.
What does it take to get you off your asses?
" \ b u wam to dfe, Felix? Dfe!" That's a line
from Tiie Normal Heart. In his immense firustration, Ned Weeks yells it at his dyir^ lover. That's
not only how I felt abottt ftlix, tun how I feel
about all of you.
Wtiat does it take to make peopfe hate? I hate
Ed Koch (yet anottier gay "brother") tiecause tie
is ttie one person in this entire work! who could
tiave done sometliing in ttie beginning and dkln't,
and it took us two yeais to even get a meeting with
him. We must always remember that, as Dr.
Mattiilde Kreim tells us, *This is an epidemk that
coukl have been contained." Now Koch lias put
yet anottier poweriess wimp in place as his Commissioner of Health, and gay men and vhRomen in
New York still kiss Koch's ass, as gay men and
women still think Ronald Reagan is peachy
wonderful and gs^ peopfe in Massachusetts think
that Ted Kennedy is wonderful—and tie is ctiaige
of tiealth issues in ttie Senate and tie has been
silent and cowardly aixxit AIDS for six long years.
How many dead brothers have to t>e piled up in
a heap in front of your feces liefore you leam to
fight back and scream and yell and demand and
take some responsibility for your own lives?
I am telling you that they are killing us and we
are letting them.
Yes, I am screaming like an tiysteric. I know
tliat. I look and sound like an asstiole. I told you
this was going to l)e my last tirade, and I am going to go out screaming so f*cking rudely ttiat
you will tiear this coarse, crude voice of mine in
your nightmares. You are going to d k , and you
are going to die very, very soon unless you get
up off your f*cking tushies and fight back!
Unless you do—you will forgive me—Imt you
deserve to die.
I never I ttiought I would come to say anything
like that. Nobody deserves to die.
I recendy spoke at a Village Ibice AJDS Forwn
in New \ b r k , on a panel with Dr. Ron Grossman,
wtio tias one of ttie largest gay practices in New
York. "Larry," tie said to me, "our most
outrageous early pronouncements are stiort of ttie
mark. And so tiave bfoen our efforts. Ws are so
bdiind."
AIDS is our tiolocaust. Tens of thousands of
our precious men are dying. AIDS is our
holocaust and Reagan is our Httfer and New Ybrk
City is our Auschwitz.
Holocaust IS another word for genockte, a wotd
I tiear myself and ottiers using more and more
fiequendy. \bu don't hear it as much as you heard
words like "mandatory testing" or "no sex educatfon in the schools" or "no condom ads on TV."
Why doesn't everybody realize that all ttie
screamiiig and yelliiig going on about "education"
and "mandatory testing" is one whafe of a red
lierrii^?
Why doesn't eveiyone realize that whife all the
tiatred and fiiry from the right wing, from die fundamentalists, ecumenicals. Mormons, Southern
Baptists, bom-agains, Ctiarismatics. Orthodox
lews, Phyllis Scliafly, Itel Cameron, Gov.
Deukmejian, Rep. Dannemeyer, Jesse Helms,
ferry Falwell, and all their eqiudly vocal supporters, goes on—that whife they are screaming
and yelling about tlie naughtiness of condoms and
sex education and liomosexuality, the killing
cidprit virus continues to spiead and ^ircad and
spread and kill and kill and kill. Whife Rome
taims, the I^wells fkldfe, fenning their fiindamentalisis into Any against die feggots—and tlie
junkies and the nigg*rs and spies and the whor*s
and...
And they know it!
It is perfecdy clear to me, no matter wtiat
Ronald Reagan and his henchmen say, that no
substantial battfe Ibr a cure will tie mounted whife
tie is in office and ttiat we must endure, at ttie
feast, anottier 18 months of uniended, intended
death. >%ry consciously they know ttiat the more
noise they can make, the more sttlling uartics they
can put into action, with the aid of their Presideitt, who supports them, and widi the aid of his
staff and his Cabinet and liis >6ce-Presideirt and
his Attorney General and his Justice Department
and tiis Stipreme Court and his Secretary of
Education smd his various Secretaries and Assistam Secretaries of Health and Human Services
and his director of the Nadonallnstimies of Heahh
and his Centers for Disease Control—the more
gays and bf*cks and Hispanics will dfe.
Ttiey know this. I tielieve it is as conscious an
act as this.
And we are allowiiig this. We tiave fellen into
their trap!
Our leaders—such as they are—tlieir energies
are consumed fightiiig these iKttdes against mandatory testing and for tietter education. No one
is fighdng ttie NIH for drugs and increased protocol testing and fester research. I am telling you
' \ . j h e research rivalries ...
could make a TV series to rival
Dynasty and Falcon Crest in
competitiveness, hostility,
selfishness and greed.
ttiat ttiere are drugs and treatments out ttiere that
can prolong our lives, and you are not gening
ttiem and no one is fighting for ttiem and ttiese
diugs and treatments are caught up in so much
red tape ttiat ttiey are strangled in ttie pipeline—
and ttic Reagan Administiatfon kncws this, knows
all this, and does nothing about untai^ing ttie red
tape—and tialf ttie men reading this can d k
tiecause of it.
Yes, t)y our passivity we are actively colluding
and partkipating in our own genocide. We are
allowing ourselves to l>e knocked off one tiy one.
Half die men reading this could tie dead in five
years.
Our gay organizatfons are weak and still don't
work with each ottier, and our AIDS oiganizations liave all l)cen co-opted by the very systems
tticy were formed to make accountable. And you
ail sit by atid allow it to happen wben it's your
lives that are going down tlie tul>cs.
Politkians understand only one thing: pressure.
You don't apply it, you don't get anything. Simple as ttiat. And it must be applied day by week
by month by year. You simply can't let up for one
single second, or you don't get anything. Whkh
is wliat is happening to us.
For six years, I tiave tieen trying to get the gay
world angiy enough to exert this pressure. I have
foiled, and I am ashamed of my feilure. I blame
myself. Sometiow I wasn't convincing enough or
clever enough or cute enough to break through
your denial or self-pity or death wish or selfdestruction or wliatever the fiick is goii^ on.
I'm dred of trying to make you hear me. I'm
shutting up and going away. The vast majority of
the gay world will not listen to what is so simpfe
and pfein. That around this country ttiere are so
few voices as strident as mine is our tragedy. Tliat
across this country ttiere is not one singfe gay
leader who has any natfonal recognition like
Gloria Steinem or Cardinal O'Connor or Jerry
Falwell or Jesse Jackson is also our tragedy. Why
is that? Why does every gay spokesman finally
just collapse under the apadty of trying to make
you listen—and feiling, felling utterly.
Don't you ask yourselves quite offen the Big
Questfon: Why am I still alive? Untouched? At
some point, I dkl something the ottiers dkl. How
liave I escafied?
Don't you think that makes you obligated to
repay Ood or Bttc or wtiomcver or wtittever—if
oidy your conscfence—for this miraculous feet:
I am still alive. I must put back something into
this world fbr my own life, which is worth a
tremendous amoum. By not putdng back, you are
saying that your lives are worth s h i t that we deserve to dfe, and diat the deadis of all
our friends and loves liave tunoimted to nothing.
I can't believe in your heart of hearts you feel
this way. I can't tielieve you want to d k .
Do you?
AIDS Rochester, Inc
Office: 232-3580
Hotline: 232-4430
..,
--'^'"''^^-•"'"-
18
EMPTY CLOSET
.•_v.:wy.tt;ixJBi»)?~;A%:3r!:M5ftr^.-.i..-
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Cay c r o u p s
ACT UP
ByMutfaiHIrasa
Rochester ACT UP (AIDS Coalidon to Unleash
Bower) will disctiss demonstrations to be held at
the April Democratk and Republican preskfential debates at the next two meetings, Mond^,
March 14 and Wednesday, March 23.
Tlie demonstrmions will protest the feilure of
most ofttie presidential candidates to address the
AIDS issue.
ACT UP meetings are held at 7 p.m. at the Gay
Alliance of Genesee Vtlky lounge in the Genesee
Co-Op buildii^, 713 Monroe Ave.
Roctiester ACT UP lias joined the national
AIDS acdvitist network, ACT NOW (AIDS
Coalition to Network, Organize and Win), and
is plannit^ a week-long Spring AIDS Action in
conjunction with at>out ^ ottier oiganizations
aroimd the country to bring attention to AIDS
issues locally.
ACT UP is focusing on lobliying state and
federal officials. The group shares AIDS
Roctiester, IIK.'S concem ttiat New York state lias
not sul>stantially increased funding for local AIDS
agencies despite ttie doublii^ of the number of
AIDS cases locally, and ACT UP members tiave
launched a letter-writing campaign to local and
state officials.
ACT UP memtiers met with Congresswoman
Louise Slaughter on Feb. 29. Meml>ers are concerned atxiut Slaughter's vote for ttie Dannemeyer
resolution, which uptield a ban on ttie use of
federal funds for AIDS education materials and
projects that would "promote or encourage"
tiomosexual sexual activities.
Jackie Nudd, executive director of AIDS
Rochester, Inc., will speak at tlie March 23
meeting on ways ACT VP can work effectively
with her oiganization on AIDS issues.
A £ ^ VP members are involved in different activities and at different levels ofthe AIDS activist
movement. Some memtiers liave fomted a focus
group on gay and lesbian rights within AdT VP
to deal with AIDS-related tiomophobia locally.
Members are also involved in passing out
literature and phoning local officials to discuss
AIDS issues as part of a mass eduatfon effort.
Roctiester ACT UP is open to anyone concerned about the AIDS crisis.
Alpha
By Horace Lethbridge
Alptia's youth are increasingly enthusiastk
about a new topical approach to ttieir twice monthly social/informatfonal ineetings. Since January,
ttiere has tieen a specific focus during ttie informational time, a time for stiaring and discussion.
During March, April and May ttie five-part
series will end and ttien repeat, as follows:
"Preventfon of sexually transmitted diseases and
AIDS preventfon," March 5; and "Coming oitt,"
March 19
"Making connections (communication, iistening skills)," April 2; and "Dating, relationships,
toward partnerships (Mr. and Mr., Ms. and Ms.),"
April 16.
In May die topks will be "Sexuality (values
clarification)" and "Preventfon of sexually
E.D.G.E.
Of Rochester...
A Communication
and Support Group
formed BY and FOR
Disabled/Handicapped
GAY MEN and WOMEN
transmitted diseases and AIDS prevention."
Alpha, for gay and lesbian young peopfe age
16 through 20^ meets from 1 to4p.m. on die fiist
and third Satimfeys of the month. The group was
designed three years ago to pravkfe support, social
opportunities and informatfon for what can be diffioih transition years.
Each session is provided by two adult
voliuaeers. A steering comminee that meets monthly is responsible for planning and coordination
of aduh wlunteeis and programs.
For more information, either about attendii^
as a youth or volunteering as an adult, call
442-2986 and leave your name, phone number
and good dme to retum your call.
Parents & Friends
of Lesbians
and Gays
By Marion Holden
Parents and Friends of Lesbian and
Gays/Rochester (PEuents FLAG) wiil sponsor a
workshop, "Coming Out to Your I^arents," on
Saturday, March 19. Ttie workstiop, which will
tie conducted by I^rents FLAG director Dick
Behnke, will be held from 1:30 to 5 p.m. at St.
Luke's Episcopal Cburch, 17 South Fitzhugh St.
(comer of Broad Street).
I^rents FLAG'S monthly meetii^ will lie'^tteld
on Sunday, March 27 at 2:30 p.m. at St. Luke's.
This will lie a stiaring and discussion meeting,
and confidentiality is assured.
For more informadon on the workstiop or
I^rents FLAG, call Behnke at 392-4796L
OMEGA
By John H.
The next event sponsored by OMEGA,
Rochester's group for older lesbians and giiy men,
will be a '^working brunch"^—a tax symposium led
by a broker who will discuss IRAs, the new tax
laws and other topics.
OMEGA'S social committee chose a cuckoo
tlieme for ttie group's last gathering, a Febniary
Picnic/Ice Cream Social, tield at Helen's home
on Feb. 20.
Ttie group is planning a huge garage sale/antique sale fund-raiser for April or May.
OMEGA has a new teleptione number for
memtiers, and to answer questfons for potential
menfoers. For information on aiiy of OMEGA's
activities, cail Jack at 381-0739, or write PO Box
887, Rochester, NY 14607.
OMEGA (Older, Mamre & Gay Action/Advocacy) is a service oiganizatfon for middle-aged
and older gay men and lesbians, with a focus on
socialization and education, that provides outieach
to memtiers with special needs. Most of
OMEGA'S 80 members are 40 to 60 yeais old,
and atxHit tialf are women.
Out & About
Out & Alx>ut, die gay and lesbian outing group
ofttie Genesee ^ l e y , tield its second annual lianquet at ttie Hong Kong Restaurant on Friday, F ^ .
19. Members enjoyed dinner, dancing and a stiort
awards ptesentatfon, and discussed the 1988
outing schechile.
This mondi's acdvities will include bowling on
Satimfey, March 5» and an evening with die
Bucket dance troupe on Saturday, March 19.
April will begin with the traditfonal white water
raflfog excuisfon, and reservatkms are tieing taken
for a trip to New Yotk City in May.
Out A About members have lieen acdve
throughput ttie winter. A group has met to cross
country sid at Mendon Bonds Park on Sundays
at noon, and another group has gone downhill skiing on Satunddy evenings at Bristtri Motmtain.
Out & About is open to all indivkluals in the
Rochester area. Acdvities include hikiitg, bildng,
camping and skiing. New kfeas and new memtiers
are always welcome. The $5 annual membership
fee covers the cost of mailings and enables
members to participate in a wkte v a r i ^ of activities. Interested individuals can receive a fiee
newletter and ap|rikation by calling Ibm or Bob
at 262-2913.
Lesbian
Resource
Center
By Eiizabeth
Lesbian Resource Center (LRC) lias planned
a full sctiedide of spring events, including social
and informational meetings and a dance.
In ceiebratfon of International Women's Day
(March 8), ttie program for March 2 is a presentadon on "Women in Histoiy." Ttie second
Wsdnesday meeting, on March 16, will tie an Irish
sing-along and pot luck social.
On April 6, I\uents and Friends of Gays and
Lesbians (Rirents FLAG) wdl present an overview of the oiganization and ttie services it provides lesbians and gay men and ttieir parents and
femilies. Ttie ttieme for the social meeting on
April 20 is "Planning Ibur Summer, a Guide to
Lesbian Events." Infonnation on music festivals,
rcHnantic hidc-a-ways and special s u m m e r lesbian
tiappenings will l>c available.
The topk ofttie informational meeting on Ms^
4 is "What Every Lesbian and Bisexual Woman
Should Know About AIDS." A representative
from AIDS Rochester will talk about safe sex
practkes for lesbian and bisexual women and will
answer questions.
LRC will tiold a women-only sock hop, featuring tunes from the 'SOs and '60s and currem pop
musk hits, on Saturday, April 16 at 7:30 p.m. at
New Life Community Church, 243 Rosedale St.
(comer of Monroe Ave.).
LRC is also planning die First Annual LRC
Softball Ibumamnit and P k n k eariy diis summer. See Joan or Auounn for details.
LRC meetings are hekl die first and durd
Wsdnesdi^ of each m o i ^ at the Gt^ Alliance
of Genesee \ 4 l k y lounge tt die Genesee Co-Op,
713 Monroe Ave. For more informatfon, call dte
GAGV at 244-8640.
Gay Men's
Group
The Gay Alliance of Genesee \Wley's first men's
gtoup meeting, hdd in Rsbruaiy, was attended by
men in dieir 20s, 305, 40$, 50$ and 60s. The
groi^ plans to meet on the first and third
Thursdays dte GAGV lounge in dte Genesee Co-Op building,
713 Monroe Ave.
A stoerii^ committee is provkiing initial impetus, and has plaimed discussfon of cotnmtmity
acdvides and resources for giry men on March
3. On March 17, a vkfeotape of ttie AcademyAward-winning film Before Sttmewall, on ttie
lustory of ttie guy and lesbian commtmity, will
t>e shown, followed by a discussion.
Ttie working philosophy of group meetings is
that programs will lie planned in terms of expressed needs. Initially the group will have rap sessions ttte first Thuisday and informational
ineetings the third Thursday. The time and day
of meetings will change according to group concensus and ttte availability d space.
Meetings are open to all g ^ men 18 or older.
Bridge Club
By Randy H .
The Bridge Club of the G ^ Alliance of
Genesee Vdley will begin meeting on Sundays
at 2 p.m., beginning March 6, at ttie GAGV
lounge in ttie Genesee Co-Op, 713 Monroe Ave.
The club, which l>egan in March 1987, also
nneets on Fridays at 8 p.m. at the lounge. A donadon of $1 is required to cover ttie cost of
refreshments.
Attendance tias increased at Bridge Club
meetings; ttie club tias tiad at least two tallies at
receitt get-togettiers. Ttie club is open to everyone,
whatever their skill levels; club memtiers are willing to teach the game to tieginners.
Call 232-6720,24 hours a day.
For gay women only;
' Mondays at 8:30 pm.
For gay men only;
Sundays at 8:30 pm
Gay Al-Anon
Sundays at 7:00
OMBCJA
OLDER
MATURE & GAY
ACTION/AOVOCACY
RO. BOK 887, Rochester, NY 14603
3S1-073«
By Deborah NeOis
The world premkre d Alfred Stieglitz Loves
O'Ketsffe, a beautiiul, lender, witty pUy by Lank
Robertson, is being producedfayGMi dds mondi.
Anyone who has ever loved or studied either d
tbem, or loves art itself, must see this intimate
look at a fove/art story lierween two honest, comp l y people.
The play takes place between 1916 and 1946,
spanning photographer Al^ed Stieglitz and artist
Georgia O ' K e e ^ ' s relationship of 30 years from
its ttegiiming to tiis death. Robeitson was iit^ired
to write ttte play by Stieglitz's photograph '*Portrait of Georgia O'Keeffe," which gave him a
' ^ v e r i n g desire" to investigate ttieir reladonstup.
What he saw in Stieglitz's ptiotograph was a
"remaricahle openness on tioth parts. (Stieglitz)
saw wtio stie was and stie revealed herself to him
in a wonderlul and astounding way." Through
tlieir love for each other, Robertson experienced
not only each artist as an individual l>ut also ttie
love and communication t)etween them.
In dte play, Sti^itz describes art as the deepest,
truest form of commimication tietween two souls,
and tie comments that love is ttie same. Indeed,
it is tiard in the play to tell where the love ends
and the art starts; txith artists are so giving and
supportive of each other as people and as artists
tliat tioth ttieir art and ttieir love are enrictied.
Tliis is partkulariy evidenced in 0*Keeffe'$ art.
As Robertson reveals in die play, OlCeeffe had
stopped painting t>efore Stieglitz found her
previous work. He had a progressive view of art
for his time and was a speartieading force for ttie
recognition of p h o t o g n q ^ and modem art as
valid art forms.
This progressiveness and willingness to accept
different interpretations of art allowed him to see
what many had not in O'Keeffo's work—not only
great art, but ttie first female art he'd ever seen.
For the first time, tie saw in tier charcoal drawi t ^ wtiat it was like to be a woman. This was
1916, wtien artists were men and believed tliat the
highest form of creation a woman could itttain was
havitig a baby. Stieglitz, a lover of art, fed in love
widi OKeefib and her work, and jgave her dte siq>port to stand alotte as a person and an artist.
Robeitson deals widi die diffktdt quesdons surroiuiding their separatfon by remaining true to the
complexity of these two great human beings.
Throughout the first act, we see O'Kecffe strugglii« to make a world for herself ainong S t i ^ i t z '
friends, critics, even in his apartment filled with
his things. She repeats that site needs space and
light and air, and we see it as she rips down the
tieavy drapes from ttte windows and moves tier
easel fuidier into die room, attending to estalilish
a space within New York for herself.
Uldmately, the stimuli that Stieglitz treasures
in New \bi1c and needs as an artist is ttie antitt*esis
of O'Keeffe's needs; she conies to realize that to
satisfy her artistic needs, as Rol>ertson puts it,
"site needs all of New Mexico." They painfully
tear apart from one anottier, but tlieir relationship
never really ends, even after his death.
Judith Anna Rot>eits and Jeremiah Sullivan
bring a depth of understanding and experience to
ttie roles of O'Keeffo and Stieglitz. Roberts captures O'Keeffe's blend of sensual womanliness and
natural, no-nonsense grit with a dash of reserve.
My ttieater companion, wtio tias studied Stieglitz's
work, said ttiat if stie could conjure up an image
of ttie man from his art, Sullivan lias definitely
created it.
Ttie two actors sustained the emotion through
a distracted second act which could tiave been ttie
result of tlie preview I saw, and will protiably be
cleaned up liy opening night. Both performances
give insight and intimaQr to two peopk, now gone,
who created the art and love we can enjoy today.
The set and lighting, by William Barclay and
Rkhard Wmkler, respectively, worked tieaudfolly
togettier, literally creating a frame atop ttie stage
from where ttieir lelationshqi trnfokls. An ordinal
score created by Norman L. Berman for this production adds gready to recreatiiig the period v^ile
sustaiiung a timeless, abstract quality. Kudos to
director Alan R. Belknap for pulling it all
together.
Alfred S t i ^ i t z Loves O'Keeffe runs March
5-26 at G M Theater i b r dcket ittformation, a d l
2321363.
A note for studetit*: You won V watu to miss this
siiow, arid you itave tto excuse not to! With student ID, you can get tickets 15 minutes before curtain , for $5~so instead cfa movie, treat ytmrself
to live, viscertd history.
In ctmJuncHon with tiie play, tiie intermttkmtd
Museum of Piuftograpky ttt George Eastman
House will shttw an exhiirit cf 90 of Stieglitz's
piwttygrapiis, including a dozen portraits cf
Georgia O'Keeffe, dirough May> The mttseum is
located at 900 East Ave.
Rochester Productions has exteruied its run cf
Broadway Baties, reviewed in last month's issue
cftiie Entity Closet, tiirough April J. fbr ticket
informatitm, call 244-1934. Tickets are also
availaifle at POrkleigh, 215 Park Ave.
The Little Shop
Artist Jim Fudge in his studio. Fudge's "Jake's Ihn/eling Road Show"
is on exhibit at Lettuce and Leaf Restaurant, 522 Monroe Ave.,
through the end of March. The Jake sketches are aeiosol and crayon
figure studies of men and women, together and separately (see pg.
10). The restaurant is open lUes to Sat., 6 to 10 pm.
BAGV fundraiser
Academy Award Nominee
HILARIOUS AND
PROFOUNDLY MOVING"
- f o d U r f f t w A i w . NEWHOUSE NEWSf¥iPEXS
Sunday, June 12, 8 pm
sign language
MARCELLO MRSIROIRNN
DmtK'EYES
interpreted
A FILM BY
NIKITAMIKHALKDV
Tickets now on sale
Get on the ball...
Rochester Historical Bowling Society
381-0739
or
385-4578
A r t s Talk
Stieglitz loves O'Keeffe, and you will too
A Jewish Community Center
Center Stage Production
and
AA can help.
Sign language interpreted,
last meeting of the nDonth.
19
of Horrors
Is drinking
a problem
in your life?
Or come to Qay AA
at St. Luke's Church
on Thursdays at 8:30 pm.
EMPTY CLOSET
Thuredays 8:30 pm
Fun • Friendship • Recreation
at Clover Lanes. 2750 Monme Ave.
For info: 467-0877
Starts March 2
Academy Avmrd Nominee
$10
"MAGNIFICENT'.'
P«ya>>ia to QAGV,
713 Momoe Awe. 14607
fbr t i d w t info
call QAGV at 244-8640
^1
W
JOHN HUSTON'S
Vincmt CantDi THC NEW VORK TIMES
-EXQUISITEr
ShcibBcmon
LOS ANGELES TINES
MO EAST AVE
Starts March9
l^^-• i- m ^ * « T ? ' V ' — -*-'yr**J''i»- •
20
EIMPTY CLOSET
-j»A-A«:,ec-3aRS;--:
March 1, 1988
March 1. 1988
Artists show work at Pyramid | ^}f^^ »^Jjyi?r*^l»'iit3^
On March 26, Pyramid Arts Center, 421
University Ave., will hcdd its annual art auction,
at which interested collectors can view the work
of local artists, and bid on aiK) purchase original
pieces.
Two paitkipants in the auction are Scott Coblio
and Joe Reto, who, although their styles differ,
have l>ecoine a working art team. Their work
overlaps, weaves through each other*s and
sometimes aesttietically opposes one another*s,
but Coblio and Reto feel they are creative
springboards for each other.
Coblio*$ piece, ^'Halloween Wnd," is an
ll-by-14 inch black-and-white photograph of a
tMuien forest with a woman in the fordlront. Reto
used watercoior, marker, collage and paper
sculpnire to create his 22-fcy-30 inch piece. "Kung
Fu Sex Ape."
How do pop art and surrealist pliotograptiy coi^
stitute a creative art team? Coblio and Reto live
and work out of ttieir tK>me together.
"Ws support one anottier," Reto says. *i do a
lot of collage work using clippings from
niagazines and newspapers, so if Scott sees
something tie thinks I can use, he*ll present it to
rtie as an idea or raw material, attd 111 take it from
there. Likewise, I keep my eyes open for interesting locations and faces to photograph.
"Lots of our work comes from collat>erative
ideas," Reto says. "Also, I think that we generally inspire each other, coming from similar
l^ilosophka! viewpoints. Thc support is not just
m art, but in evcrythitig wc do."
In additon to his ptiotpgraphy, Coblio is also
a singer and soiigwriter wlio's just recorded some
of his originals at Saxxon Recording Studios.
"Joe names many offus paintings after niy song
titles, or sometimes literally paints my sot%,"
Top left: Scott Cobiio's
"Halloween Wind."
Coblio st^s. *rm Brenda Starr,* for instance,
is the name of one of the songs IVe just recorded, as well as ttie title of one of Joe*s paintings,
so we kind of tiave these muUi-medium versions
ofour ideas because we do a lot for and because
of one anottier."
Reto and Coblio have had one-man showings
of ttieir work in ttieir respective liometowns,
Bangor, Fa. and Geneva. New York.
Coblio also appeared briefly in ttie new John
Witers film, Hairspmy, with Debbie Harry and
Divine.
Reto does original drawings for the Roctiestei
Museum and Science Center. He recendy designed ttie logo for Kwanzaa, an annual tilack AfricanAmerican celebration.
All of the works at the auction will be exhibited
at the Pyrsmid the week preceding the auction.
Top right: Joe Reto's " K u n g
Fu Sex Ape."
Left: Joe Reto and Scott
Coblio
photos courtesy of the artists
Gay Men's Chorus
celebrates Sth year
The Rochester Gay Men's Chorus (RGMC) wUl
perfonn a Fifth Anniversary Celebration concert
on Saturday. March 26 at 8 p.m. and Sunday,
March 27 at 4 p.m. at Hochstein Music Sctiool,
50 North Plymouth Ave.
Ttie concert will include the wortd premier of
RGMC*s first privately-cotnmissioned piece of
music, ^^Smiling, Breathing, Striding," composed by Eastman School of Music £EK:tdty memtier
Roben May.
Ttie piece is tiased on a poem by Austrian writer
Franz Werfel, one of ttie founders of ttie expressionist movement in German literature. In 1940
Weriel fled Nazi-occupied Europe for the United
States, where lie wrote The Song cf Bemadette,
one of his most popular novels.
M ^ tias received four awards from the
American Society of Composers. Authors and
Publishers since 19S5. His "Typhon" was
presented by the New \brk Philtiamionic in June
1987
The concen will also incltide an overview of
ttie chorus*s most popular performances during
ttie past five years. Coimie Fnmcis will retum to
center stage when RGMC preforms "Beehive
Hair-Dos and Motorc^le Boots" from the 1985
summer pops concen. Other finoriles will include
ttie folk song "KumtMya;* sung and sign language
interpreted; and Cole Barter's "Let*s Do h " and
Jerome Kerns "The Wiy \bu LookIbnight" from
Roberta, which RGMC first performed at die International Festival of GALA Choruses in Minneapolis, Minn, in 198d
Tickets are Sl and are available at Com Hill
Market, 319 Eitchai«e Blvd.; IMdeigh. 215 Patk
Classifieds
Subscribe to
The EMPTY CLOSET
Call 244-9030 for Detaila!
JFK was in
The White House...
ROOMMATE WANTED: Gay woman or man,
share foil tiouse, laundry facilities; own room.
West Brighton, close to UR and RIT. SK) a week.
Call 272-1806, llam-2pm.
John Glenn was in orbit.
Beehives were in...
And girls tssUy
knew how to
tease!
GET BACK TO YOUR ROOTS
APARTMENT FOR RENT: Maplewood area.
Large apartment in oki tiome. Newly redecorated,
appliances, natural woodwork, hardwood floors,
porch, off-street parkirig, bus route, near Kodak.
$450/month plus utilities and security deposit.
Phone 458-6511 evenings.
that have arisen in each piece.
It is our intention to present every poim of view
whh all the humor and compassion and understanding of which we and our mtfcrial are capable
and that by this means our own view becomes
known.
We are Theater, a mirror, a reflection of ttie
worid arbiuid us, and all we really have to be is
tlie tiest reflection of tlie iMorld around us.
Therefore, it has lieeh our policy from thr lieginning to get tlie best person for the job and at this
point we have a list of heterosexiuds wlio have
worked for us and a list of lesbians and gay men
who have worked for us. (I hope it is needless
to say that ctming right across those groups, in
(••UnRmaJlNmninMnraiMjmKaBS
^ .
[mimS
M:l
NOIV S H O W I N G
Q^^Q*"
Loe
t:i\e«t
THINK
GREEN
Green Derbies • Green Leis
Green Balloons • Green Shamrocks
Green St. Patrick's Day Decorations
COME TO
KING SALES/COURT JESTER
46 Sager Drive • 442-8922
^ofrtulver between East & Urilversity behind Enipiro B ^ ^
21
its own feir percent, are tiisexuals who are identified straigitt or gi^ at the momem tiecause of
their partictdar cturent love iitterest.) That's tiow
complicaied tfiat all gels, so we do not at aiiy time
ask anyone what her or his sexual ineference is,
and tfiere are those who have worked for us or
with us and we don't know anything about their
"personal preference."
Vie invite you to get on our mailii^ list, wliich
is the best way to stay informed. I^ease make a
note if you are interested in performance or tech
also. Send a postcard or note to BlackRose Productions, Box 477, Rochester, NY 14603.
Joan £. Giuffre is tiie ctmipatty director cf
BlackBose Productions.
MCC founder's story
is timely readin
By Wmdy A.
The Lord Is
GaybythePev.
50421, Austin,
Jones
My Shepard and He Knows I'm
Troy Perry. Liberty Press, POBox
TX 78763. $8.95.
The Lord Is My Shepherd and He Knows I'm
Gay is ttie autobiographical story of Troy Perry,
founder of the Universal Fellowship of
Metropolitan Community Churches (UFMCC).
Berry was an activist almost from the motnent he
came out. His story, altliough told in a somewhat
tiapliazard and amateur fashion, is a nioving one
filled with the joys, sorrows and struggles of tieing gay and tieing proud of it.
Perry is a man filled with a love for God, a God
Vho created him and ottiers. His children, as g ^
human beings. Peny speaks of being ostracized
and excommunicated from various churches when
ttie truth of his hom*osexuality came to light. He
struggled with the question of hom*osexuality being a sin and discovered through prsfyer and
meditation that God created hom*osexuals, and
' therefore hom*osexuaitty could not be sinful. God
loves all his children, no matter what their color
or sexual orientation.
Ttie UFMCC churcties were started as a result
of police tiarassment against gays. A friend of
Perry's, Carlos, was thrown into prison for buying a beer in a gay bar in Southern California.
Carios told Perry that this harassmem, imprisonment and sutisequent life-long police record as
a **sex offender** was living proof that '*God just
doesn't care!"
That was thc spark tfiat set the fire within l^ny.
On Oct. 6. 1968 he held tfie first Metropolitan
Community Church service in his living room in
Huntit^ton l^rk, California. Twelve people attended ttiat service.
At the writirig of tlie new edition of this tiook
in 1987, UFMCC had a church group in all 50
states and Canada, Mexico, Costa Rica, England,
France, Denmark, Nigeria. Indonesia, Australia
and New Zealand. The church has more than 300
licensed and ordained cfergy and more than
40XX)0 memtiers. It operates Samaritan College
in Los Angeles and publishes a denominational
magazine, Joumey.
My reading this tiook was timely, considerit^
the disputes currendy going on lietween three
local Presbyterian churches, Brighton,
nukminster United and Webster Presbyterian
churches, and Third Presbyterian Church. Third
Church has a policy of reaching out to welcome
The Rev. Troy Perry
gay men and lesbians and has allied itself with
a national Presbyterian movemem. "More Light."
which allows ordination of gays and allows gays
to sit on governing boards within ttie ctiurch's administrative structure.
Third Church tias stated ttiat it will welcome
openly gay individuals, but, in keeping with national Presbyterian church polity, will not ordain
them as deacons or ministers. Brighton
Presbyterian will not allow openly gay people to
join the church unless they renounce their "sin
of being hom*osexual" and convert to
tieterosexuality.
The segregation of gay Christians is no different
and no less a crime ttian the segregation of peopfe of color. Until all of God's children can worship in ttie same tiouse, we will lie felling stiort
of folfilling God's intemion for us, ttiat "Tliy will
be dotie on earth as it is in Heaven.*'
The book is also great reading for people like
me wtio are not femiliar with tlie history of ttie
gay rights movement. I teamed atiout tlie Johns
Commission in Florida, a veritabfe witch hunt for
hom*osexuals in the state of Fforida in the late 50s
and earty 60s, the Stonewall uprising in 1969 and
the generally liarbaric and unfeir laws existing,
even now, in several states conceming sexual acts
between conseming adults.
at tbe
VfUage Cktte S q u a r e
2 7 4 N. G€)i)dfrum
aod
BiUC. Datvu
•nMnianin
IStilSrjta*^ m J S S S S i .
ROOMMATE WANTED: Professional male.
30, seeking housemate for Ctiarlotte area tiome.
$285/ntonth includes room, fomistied or unfornished, laundry, plus utilities. Prefer non-smoker.
Call 621-3832.
ROOMMATE WANTED: Gay female looking
for mamre gay female to stiare 2-bedroom apartment in a carriage tiouse in ttie South ^Msdge area. FOUR HAIRCTYLISTS WANTED: Galaxy
$235 covers adl ttie luxuries! Must tie an animal Hair, 467-1132.
lover! It's available as of NOW! Call 454-3772.
MALE CTRIPPER: I will entertain you or
your
party for half an hour. Mafe or female parWANTED: Housemate, male, white, 30-50, to
share tiotise, yard work and expenses in rural set- ties welcome. For bookirigs, call 436-7843.
ting. Myself: just divorced, teamster, 41, white,
COME a i O W VOUR STUFF! Actors, musi5*11". 115 lbs., 4-yr.-old son on weekends. Into
cians,
s i i ^ r s , poets, comics, dancers, pertioots & Levi's. No fems, drunks or druggies need
call. 359-4514 affer 4 p.m. weekdays, all day formers. >^*ie lookii^ for all acts (including audition pieces) for on-goii^ variety shows.
weekends. Ask for Ron.
Ph^wrights: >^'re also looking for original
plays,
finished or in-progress, to produce.
HOUSEMATE WANTED: Quiet bisexual
All artists please call BlackRose Productions
woman seeking clean, quiet, mature, openat
442-30ea
or write PO BOK ATI, Rochesier, NY
minded woman—l^bian, bi, or heterosexual—
to share pleasant 3*bedroom house in South 14603 for exchange of information.
WDttge, off Meigs St. Must be vegetarian nonTRANSVESTITE GROUP IMEV£L(H>ING:
smoker who can at least tolerate cats. House has
Call
723-1698, or write Occupam, PO Box 92055,
I quiet, weU-behaved cat; off-street parking; own
bedroom; lots of storage space in attk, baaonent, Rochester, NY 14692.
3ni bednxMn A dining room; furnished living
Riom, kitchen. $220 per month plus utilities. Call
A group is forming to leam about issues rehaedl
244-9030 K>am-6pm Mon., Wsd., Fri. or leave to male S & M . Please call 442-2986 or write:|
mrtsagc on answering machiiie. AvailaUe March Occupant, PO Box 12547. Rochester. NY 14612.
15.
viuamnuiMMRRn
itnuOKIIiUltiinw
BlackRose Productions is satisfied thm we
presemed diese pieces entertainir^y, in a safe and
comfortabfe aOnoqihere, witfi as much respect for
mattrial, actors and audience as fresh maierial,
and a new company, allows.
Now diat we know what we're talkii^ about,
it is time to take the issues that arose in the
plays—hom*ofrfiobia, sexism, ageism, reHgious
and governmem persecution, war attitiides, peace
atdtudes, lifestyles witfiin die context of gay life
that are adi^Hed by individuals in their personal
efforts to cope with life at all—
and put them, one at a time, imder the magnifying glass.
So the flrst production oithe new season is Bill
C. Davis' Mass Appeal, a close-up view of ttie
101 issues tfiat affect tfie individual's relationship
to organized religion, from the CathoUc
invc^vement—the first and still tfie largest V^bstem
Christian religious organization. It's still a play
with a lot of laughs and a play with more issues
being addressed per scene than could tie grasped
by all but ttie most militant, activist, historicallyinformed feminist pacifist people of our day.
At the same time Mass Appeal, like future and
previous phiys, has the capacity to entertain, inform and make a wonhwhife evening at the theater
for anycMie.
To take ttie concept of entertainment as leactiing
tool and audience involvement one step forttier,
we are going to take ttie ttieatrical presentation
process a step further and open the door to ttie
audience memtiers, wtio tiave an interest in tiow
a play goes from audition to final performance,
or an interest in understanding ttie issues closeup or would like the opportunity to comribute an
opinion to character developmem or interpretation to ttie product liefore it is presented
completedVh also liave a call out for anists and performers of description as well as people to leam
or practice tlie technical aits.
Rumor lias it that only lesbians can work for
BUckRose Productions. This is blatandy untrue;
we are by no means separatists. With all due
respect, the separatist point of view is given audience by us, as it appears in plays we tiave done
and plays we will do, Iwt it is one view of many
WANTED: 17-20-year-old lesbian of color for
friendship. Me: Black, 19, 5*2", androgynous,
love sports, music, fun. Psych major from NYC.
\bu: fit, out. honest, like sports, androgynous, M O N R O E / G O O D M A N A R E A : Two .
wiseass! Picture if possible. Write: Bucky, PO bedroom apartments, off-street parkir^. $325 inBox 27203, Rochester, NY 14627-7203.
cludes heat. 244-4960. 4-9 p.m., Mon.-Fri.
1962...
Ave.; I\iul*s Grocery, 644 Monroe Ave.; Pyramid
Arts Center, 421 University Ave.; Record Archive, 1394 Mt. Hope Ave.; and Village Green,
766 Monroe Ave.
Tickets may also ITC obtained by callitig die
Chorus Line at 235-2473 (leave name and phone
numlier) or fay mailing a check, payable to
RGMC, to: RGMC, PO Box 1892, Rochester, NY
14603. Tickets will be availabie at die door for $&
The coticen will lie sign lai^tiage interpreted.
Hochstein Music School is accessible to ttie
differently-abled.
Other chorus news
In late February. RGMC Chairman Ted Lyon
prcsetited donations from the chorus to representatives of AIDS Rochester, Inc. and Helping People with AIDS as part ofa program RGMC began
last year to donate Sl from every ticket sold for
the holiday ooncert to otganizations working with
people with AIDS.
RGMC performed at two interfiiith religious
services that were part of the "AIDS Vigil of
Prayer" sponsored by Open Arms Metropolitan
Cotnmtmity Ctuirch and AIDS Rochesier, Inc. on
Feb. 19 and 20. The chorus sang "Kumbaya,"
"Eidogy," originally commissioned for the Seattle Men*s Chorus^ and "Evensong,** a commissioned work of the Twin Cities Men*s Chorus of
Minneapolis, Mitm.
The chorus held its armual meedng and elections on Jan. 25. New officers are Ted Lyon,
chairman; Jon Templin, vice ctiairman; Larry
Mancine, secretary; and Jon Millis,
member-at-latge.
By J o a m E . Gbuffire
Wfi're going to see this througji my eyes because
r m supposed to be the big creative f o r c e actually, Fm probably just the fostest talker. In
the sentence, "I'm supposed to be tbe big creative
force, "supposed** is tieing used to say, that*s what
I get jMdd for, ttiat's my functfon—to set game plan
and figtue out tiow ttiese miracles are supposed
to come about.
I set game plan by bouncing ideas off the
philosopiiy, "Do umo others as you would have
them do unto you." So, the solutions to all prol^ems are very snnple—like, I'm sure Russia
would rather we were sending diousands of big,
stnM^, tmgtit American boys over ttiere to help
feed their people ttian putting a ring of guns and
bomlis around their benders — and I'm sure we
would rather Russia be helpii^ us solve ttie pure
wains problam than mainoiming tiietr stiqiid submarine, ^fishingfleet**and airplane annoying flying tnissions everywhere and sending guns all over
the damn world.
Anywi^, BlackRose tias tieen blessed with attracting a veritable' harvest of creative forces. >^*11
start with theater tiecause that*s tlie proving
grotmds and frankly, the most fon. BlackRose
Productions launched its flrst season in existence
with The Boys in the Band by Mart Crawley, and
Jane Ctiamtiers' A Late Snow atid Last Stmuner
at Blutfish Cove.
All the plays present Gay Life 101; all duee frfays
present strangei^, intruders wtio tiave the ri^t to
know because they have stumbled on ttie scene,
they are entitled to stay, ttiey tiave tieen or are getting involved—everything you ever wanted to
kncMV about gay life.
The format of ttie plays is a comfortable sitcom— plenty of laughs and just enough tragedy
to qualify the piece as "ttieater" and every issue
of the d ^ that would affect someone who tias to
make a decision about, in any \vay^ entering tiie
tife or even copitig on phmet Eardi. Except AIDS;
AIDS tias not been addressed, because ttie disease
was an unknown when these p U ^ were written.
V^ did deal with the epidemic for woinen, cancer,
and how it affects the individiud and how ttie lesbian commimity deals with a friend with the
disease.
EMPTY CUOSET
at tbe rear, off Ptfttna let C upotatn
down tbe btlck haOmmf.«tbe left
FiMt]r.Manh4. laea
suwdqr. Mafcb s.iaaa
ftlftPJC
Ml OdMis $5.00. Tlekcis BMy be i m r t r i tgr
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•MMy order lo Mockraoc PvoducUoni
at thc addiaaa bdow. lldnts aaqr afeo bt
at aabwMd. 633 Mtnrot aM.
QsK
22
EMPTY CLOSET
March 1, 1988
March 1, 1988
Born In t h i s m o n t h
Eyeliner
Bayard Rustin: 1910-1987
By Thpmns Krolak
"I tielieve in social dislocation and creative
trouble" This was the motto of Bt^rard Rustin,
ttie leading '^tactician" of ttie civil rights movement. His was a voice against injustice
cverywtiere, but only near the end ofhis life did
tie feel free to openly discuss his sexuality.
The events of Rustin's youth planted the seeds
of two revolutions. He was bom illegitimately on
March 17, 19K) in partly segregated Vfcst Chester,
Pa. and raised by his grandparents. He was told
black folktales and history and gained a pride in
his heritage. Rustin credited his grandmother, a
Quaker and a leader of ttie local ctiapter of the
National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), with instilling in him the
values of pacifism.
Stie was also the only person with whom the
adolescent Rustin could discuss tieing gay. He
recalled, "I never said *You know Fm gay,' but
I told her I enjoyed being with g u y s . . . And she
said, *V/e\\ is that what you really enjoy?' And
I said, 'Yes, I think I do.' Her reply was. *I suppose ttiat that's what you need to do.' It was never
an eticouragement but it was a recognition. So
I tiever felt it necessary to do a great deal of
pretending. And I never had feelings of guilt."
While traveling with his high school's football
team in Erie. Pa. Rustin was not served in a
restaurant because tie was black, ' i sat there quite
awhile and was. . .thrown out bodily. From that
point on, I took the conviction that I would not
accept segregation." He was an honor student at
West Chesler High and he later, at limes, attended college while wandering about looking for
work. He had become a Quaker and a pacifist.
Looking for a group that was against war and
discrimination, he joined thc Young Communist
League (YCL). In 1938 he went to Harlem and
began his or;ganizing career for the league. He
enrolled at City College and did just enough work
to slay "matriculated," but his real purpose was
to recruit students for the YCL. He earned money
by singing in nightclubs and gave most of his
wages to the YCL. A friend claimed Rustin could
have been "a Belafonte."
This love affair with Marxism was short-lived.
Its main motivation v^as, in Rustin's ^woIds, that
the Communists "seemed to be the only people
who had civil rights at heart." But in 1941 when
Germany invaded the Soviet Union, ttie party line
switched to the need to fight the war and the battle against racism became of less importance.
DisiUusioned. Rustin left the party and joined
the Fellowship of Reconciliation, which was
dedicated to peaceful solutions. He served the
group as field secretary and as race relations
director. Rustin founded ttie secular branch of tlie
group. Congress of Racial Equality (CORE), in
New York.
At this time Rustin met one ofttie guiding forces
in his life. A. Philip Randolph, president ofthe
Sleeping Car Porters Union. A well-known black
civil rights leader. Randolph chose Rustin to be
youth organizer for a planned march on
Wishington. D.C. in 1941 to demand more jobs
for blacks. It was called off after an executive
order forliade racial discrimination in defenserelated industries and liegan a committee on fair
employment. In 1948 Rustin and Randolph
pressured President Harry Truman to integrate the
armed forces. In 1942, Rustin was in California
to campaign on lietialf of Japanese-Americans
who had been confined and deprived of proper-
IT'S
ty. Ttie war against fescism did not affect Rustin's
pacifism. In 1943^5 he spem 28 montlis in prison
for being a conscientious objector In 1953 tie
tiecame leader of ttie Vlar Resisters League, and
in 1959 he helped to organize the first Ban-tlieBomb march to London. He and ottiers walked
across the Sahara Desert in 1960 to protest French
nuclear testing.
He also traveled to Africa tiecause tie was con
cemed with independence mc^^nients ttiere. In
the 50s tie was a founder of the anti-aparttieid
American Committee on Africa. He tiad led ttie
Free India Committee wtien he was arrested for
sit-ins at ttie British Embassy in Wuiiington, D.C
Rustin was arrested 23 titnes for non-violent
protests. His first use of civil disoliedience was
in Tennessee in 1942, when he refused to go to
ttie back of a bus to make room for whites. He
was dragged off. kicked and lieaten by policemen.
In 1947 he was one of a biracial group that traveled
in ttie south, testing a Supreme Court decision
that banned s^regation in interstate travel. He was
arrested in North Carolina for not moving to ttie
rear of a bus and spent 22 days on a ctiain gang.
Press accounts of his experience led to the end
of chain gangs in that state.
Continuing his activities in Montgomery. Ala.
in 1956 during the black bus boycoti. he met his
other shining light, the Rev. Manin Luther King,
Jr. Rustin tielped King with thc boycott and starling the Southern Christian Leadership Conference. Rustin's crowning achievement was
organizing the March on Washington, D.C. of
Aug. 28. 1963 to demand an end to racial t>arriers. Here King gave his "I have a dream"
speech.
Rustin was the chief force tiehind this
demonstration of 200.000. But he was given the
title "deputy director" tiecause ofhis gay and leftist past. He Was more radical than Randolph and
had split with him. But Randolph prevented
Rustin's exclusion from the march, despite his opposition to Rustin in ttie civil rights movement.
This anxiety about Rustin stemmed laigely from
his J953 arrest in f^sadena, Calif, on a morals
charge, for being gay. He thought it was a set-up
because he was there to agitate against segregation. The arrest liad forced his departure from ttie
Fellowship of Reconciliation. As Rustin was planning demonstrations at the 1960 presidential
nominating conventions, black Rep. Adam
Clayton Powell threatened to reveal a "liaison"
between Rustin and King. Rustin tfiought this attempt by Powell to quiet him was in return for
politcal favors.
Nothing came of the threat, but in 1963 Roy
Wilkins of die NAACP told Rustin, "I don't tfiink
you should lead this march." Rustin didn't tnidge.
and a compromise was reached. Ttien his sexuality'was made news when Sen. Strom Thurmond
attacked Rustin in a speech. But the press sided
with the marctiers.
Rustin recalled this time in a 1987 interview for
the Village Voice. Unlike 1963, when he would
not discuss g ^ s publicly, Rustin called the g ^
movement "very, very imponant" to society. It
is, he said, a "barometer" of tolerance that some
litierals can't accept.
Reflecting on gay life of a different era. Rustin
said gay bars in New York in the 30s were for
whites. Non-g2^ black bars then accepted gays.
But even now. he charged, some gay bars in New
York are unfriendly lo blacks. Black gays tiave
a double burden, he said. They must fight AIDS,
EUCHRE
Four of your favorite bars a n d
restaurants have j o i n e d
together to p r o v i d e a p l a c e for
Euchre lovers to meet, p l a y a n d
h a v e fun e n j o y i n g the g o m e
that they love best. Play \n o n e
ot m o r e of the bars e a c h m o n t h .
C h e c k with the i n d i v i d u a l bars
to see a b o u t availability.
ENJOY YOURSELVESIH
TIME!!!
which Rustin claimed was a panicular scouige
among blacks due to drug alnise, and ttiey must
deal with gay and non-gay racism.
Rustin practiced one type of racial brotherhood
t3y taking a white man, ^AUter Naegle, for a lover
in 1977. In 1982 Rustin adopted him, and he inherited Rustin's $500^000 estate.
They met at the A. Hiilip Randolph Institute in
New \brk, in the library stacks, Naegle said.
Rustin founded the Ii^itute in 1964 to improve
the status of IHacks by the use of "the nonCommunist left." A Democratic Socialist wtio
became outspokenly anti-Communist, Rustin felt
ttiere was no real difference tietween ttie two major parties.
Also in 1964, Rustin organized a huge Ixiycott
of New York City schools to protest segregation.
But pan of die black struggle took a violent turn
that July as riots erupted in Hariem. Rustin walked
through the streets trying to calm ttie rage, but
was met with rocks and tiotties.
This and other riots and the black power movement coincided with the end of much of die legal
batde for civil rights. Rustin began to tie more
coticemed with slrengttiening blacks economically and politically. This was to be achieved by mass
action, labor unions, improved education and a
liberal-black coalition.
These views put him into conflict with less patient black power advocates. He opposed what he
saw as their separatism and their anger, which he
thought would only provoke whites. His staunch
suppon of Israel also made him unpopular among
some blacks.
He. loo, could denounce while apathy loward
the causes of unrest. He called poverty programs
'^temporary relief to long-range problems." Much
more effective would be a $2 minimum wage,
Rustin said. In Senate testimony in 1966 he
presented his institute's "Freedom Budget for All
Americans." which proposed giving public works
jobs to all those qualified, and incomes to those
wtio were not, which would improve the standard
of living without raising taxes.
Rustin made (hese ideas some ofthe goals for
the Poor People's Campaign of 1968 in
Wkshington, DC. He wrote for it an "Economic
Bill of Rights" that dealt with wel&re reform,
more public service jotis, bargaining rights for
form workers and decern housing and food for the
poor.
Rustin noted thc anniversary of thc more successful 1963 march in a 1983 article in Newsweek.
He saw the problems of whites and blacks caused by our economic structure, including the shift
from labor-intensive to high-toctinology industries. Rustin saw more federal aid for higher
education and retraining workers as possible
solutions.
Quote: "You have to fight... injustice in such
a wiQT ttiat.. .even your enemy is tielped."
with an
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EMPTY CLOSET
23
Battatte leRoux
Miss Babettc's Guide to Dating
A humorous loolc
you would go to a liowling a i l ^ ; if you want to
meet someone who is rich, sensitive, attractive
and intelligent, you would not go there. So your
first step is to scientifically develop a
p^hological profite of your Ideal Mate.
Bonjour! Spring is almost upon us, and as the
winter ice ttiaws, so do the desires to find that
special someone. I don't know atiout you, tiut I
find it is gening more and more difficult to find
sotneone compatible. Here's a tielpfiil guide that
1 tiope will tielp you find ttie mate t^yoar dreams
(not of your nightmares!).
Gay people do tiot always have tlie same objectives in mind wtien ttiey meet. Which is wtiy,
as a nUe, the only time two people of the same
sex w:hieve true long-term stability in a "marriage" is wtien at least one of them is in a coma.
Pcofrfe say, "Well, if you want a marriage to
sticcecd, you have to woric at it." And I say: Why?
It isn't &ir! The ottier spates don't tiave to work
at it. They don't even have to think atiout it! Yet
here we arc, humans, thc most sophisticated
species on earth, tiaving evolved over millions of
yeais to ttie point where maiiy of us have satellite
dishes on our lawns, and we have less savvy, in
terms of our relationships, tham invertebrates.
Gay men and lesbian women need an article
that can brii^ them together and help them reach
common ground through a straightforward,
common-sense discussion of all aspects of fbidiiig
tbe right mate, &llii^ in love with this person,
getting married and living happily ever aftex; This
was exactly my goal vdien I set out to write this
piece. Unfbttunately. as you'll see, Tve &iled
conqilctely—tNit what the hell, you've already
picked up ttie column, so you might as well read
it.
A word of advice before you get stnrted
\bu cannot have a successful telationship just
by reading this column. For a retetionship to sticceed. both paities must be willing to worit, work,
woric—that^s the itey. Endless, constam, extremdy
difficult, tmpaid work. More woric tfaan is involved in ttie construction of nuijor tiric^es and tunnels. I'm gettmg tired just thinking about it.
l b know whem to look for a potential partner,
you need to know what kind of peraon you wam.
Ifyou wam to meet someone who likes to tiowl
How to develop a psychological profile of
yotir ideal mate
Choose the phrase that you believe best completes tlie sentence below:
Wealth: Thc person I wish to liave for a mate
stiould be able to afford:
1) Scotland.
2) Occasional dinners out.
3) Underwear.
Sensitivity: My mate sliould be sensitive
enough to:
1) Instantly be aware of my every mood.
2) Swerve to avoid driving over pedestrians.
3) Not deliberately liack up and run over
pedestrians a second time.
Personal appearance: My mate stiould lie attractive enough to:
1) Be a movie star.
2) Be a movie star's accountant.
3) Be a movie star's accountant's intestinal
parasite.
Intelligence: My mate stiould be smart enotigh
to:
1) Discuss great works of literature.
2) Hold great works of literature right-side-up.
3) Be able to differentiate lietween great works
of literature and food.
How to score:
Add up the niuntiers corresponding to your
^mswers. If yotir total is:
1-8: \bu're most likely to find your ideal mate
married to someone else.
9-13: \bu're most likely to find your ideal male
d ^ ^ e d to someone else.
16: \bu're most likely to find your ideal mate
in prison.
Now that you have a good klea of what you're
looking for, it's time to get out and j o i n . . .
TlM singles scene
The singles scene is located in bars ttiat are so
dark and loud it's impossible to see or hear
anybody else. You can meet, fiidl in love and get
engaged without ever getting a clear view of the
other person. This can lead to your arriving at
your wedding, with all your friends and relatives
presem, and discowring that you are tietrothed
to a cigarette machine. (This may not seem like
a total disaster, once you find out what else is
available on the singles scene.)
l b wotd dus kind of embarassmem, do what
other smart siiigles do: belbre ytm sh down, go
around the room discreetly shinii^ a police
flashlight imo the odier siiigle's ftces. Once you
have selected a likely-lookii^ ooe, sit down near
the person and get into a spontaneous
conversation.
Haur to get Inio m spoutanf ooa cowctantion
In the old days, a person got imo conversation
with another by taking a cigarette out and pretending to look for a match, which was ttie signal
for six or seven on-lot^rs to lunge toward him
or her, Bics flaming, sometimes causing severe
tmrns.
But now, we are stuck with a system in which
one party has to tioldly walk up to the other party and, with no real excuse, attempt to start a
conversation.
This is nothing to lie nervous atiout. Why do
you think ttie ottiers come to ttie singles bar, if
not to meet someone like you, only smarter and
more attractive? So go to it!
Ttie trick is to know some good opening lines
ttiat are guaranteed to get someone's attention and
tnake tier or him realize ttuit you are a caring and
stiaring person wlio tias things on your mind such
as intemationai politics and great literature, and
wtio doesn't just want to grope his or tier liody.
Some good opening lines
1) "How about that Middle East?'*
2) "How about ttiose Bronte sisters?"
3) "I don't just want to grope your body. I mean,
not tiere in the liar."
What one should do If be or she Is not
interested
Fend ttie person off via one of ttiese gendy tactful yet firm statements:
1) "Ha-ha-HA-HA-HA (cough, cough, spit)."
2) "I'm sorry, txit I just wasticd my tiair."
3) "I'm sorry, Imt unfortunately you ttokl no more
pliysical anraction fbr me than ttiose photographs
one sometimes sees of a cotd virus magnified
several million times."
If subdety doesn't work, if tlie person turns out
to be ttie type who views him or herself as a Stud
Muffin or Diva and cannot imagine you not wanting to be acquainted with her or him, then take
a more direct approach*. Mace.
Meeting people: Personal ads
Bersonals are little classified advertisem*nts that
people take out in newspapers or magazines.
Many people laugh at these ads, Imt this is the
way top stars like Johnny Carson and Joan Collins get most of their spouses.
If ,you wam yomr ad to tie effective, tiowever,
it must have cenain characteristics:
1) it should say you are profbundly attractive.
Nobody in ttie personal ads is '^average-looking.*'
If, for e x a n ^ , you had Elqihant Man's Disease,
you would describe yourself as "rugged."
2) It should be extremely specific. If you're a
woman, you jtist don't say you're looking for "a
nice woman." \bu say you're looking fbr "a 5
foot-8 inch 23-year-old Capricorn woman of
Croatian ancestry weighing 109 lbs. and having
a degree from Duke University." This lets
everyliody know you are in a position to pick and
choose, and not some semi-desperate schliunp
who has to advertise for dates.
3) It should say you Uke "candeliglu dinners and
long walks on the beach." All personal ads contain this phrase, not because anybody really takes
kmg walks on the beach, btit tiecause peopfe warn
to prove they're ronumtic and sensitive. The
lieaches of America ave teeming with couples who
met because of personal ads, staggering along,
sweating and picking sea tnchin spines ota of their
feet, everyone afraid to reveal to their partners
that they would rather be home watching a rental
movie.
Meeting |Mopie: Clubs and organizatioas
CMfen it seems die happiest relatfonships are die
ones in which the coufile stiares an interst in a
hobby, like tiass fishing. Such couples can pass
cotmtless intimate hours togettier talking bait, and
they can use their vacation time to go on lof^
fishing trips to secluded wilderness areas wtiere
tht^ will find time to be atone togettier, hour after
hour, day affer day, on some scum-encrustcd,
mosquito-inlesied lake, loully alone, until finally one of them disembowels the other with a scaling knife.
l b get into a relationship like this, you need
to devefop an imerest, ptefembly one that does
not im^ve sharp m^ilernents, and go out with
other peopfe who share the same interest.
Let's say, for example, that you share an iMBrest
in pfayskal fitness, \bu've decided to join an
athletic chib, hoping to meet that certain someone.
A sweaty jock^rap or a ripe Danskin is not acy
klea of bmking the ice, but we all tune to do what
we must. Keep coosialent appointments and constantly survey t t e crowd untfl you find a likely
pnMpoct to strike up a conversation with C*Hi!
I see we stiare an imerest in devdopii^ our gluteus
maximus! Perhaps wc should get together!")
If this doesn't work, you might try stamp collectors, or one of the major churcties.
Meeting people: At the office
If you get an office job, you'll be involved in
a serious relationshtp wittiin a matter of days. This
is ttie good news. The tiad news is, this relationship will probably involve a person who is
technically married. To a married person, ttie office is a highly romantic environment where
everytxidy wears nice clothes and discusses important issues such as ttie 3-month sales forecast,
in stark contrast to the tiome environment, where
people wear bathrobes with jelly stains on them
and get into vicious day-long arguments over wtio
put ttie ice tray with three cuties left liack into ttie
freezer
So the office becomes a large, carpeted pit of
illicit passion, wliere at least two-thirds of the activity is related to motel arrangements.
Wliatever mettiod you use to meet somebody,
your next step is to go on a number of dates so
you can get to know wtiat diis peison is really like.
Conunon first-date warning signs that your
date might be a jerk
1) He brings his mother.
2) She smells bad.
3) He smells a little too good.
4) She wants to take you to a hockey game.
5) He wants to know if you know how to clean
fish.
6) Stie calls ttie waitress "Sweets."
7) He marOges to let you know tiow much money
tie makes by some comrivance stich as pulling a
piece of paper out ofhis pocket and saying, "I'll
be damned! Here's my W-2 form!"
%> She has pictures of her car with personalized
plates.
9) He lias pictures of his ex-lovers.
10) Stie lias motivational cassette tapes in her car.
Dating
"Datirig" simply means "going out with a
potential mate arid doing a lot of fim things tfie
two of you will never do again ifyou actually get
married."
Dating has lieen an important part ofthe mateselection process throughout history. Ttie most
notorious date was between Romeo and Juliet, a
)Aouiig Italian coupfe who wem out despite their
parents' objections, r e ^ l t i i ^ in just atiout
everyliody involved tieing either stalibed or
poisoned.
Affer this tragedy, there was little dating fot
several ceimiries. During tliis time, marriages
were arranged by parents, tiased on such things
as lmw many heads ofcattfe the bride and groom
would each bring to the union. Offen the young
coupfe wouldn't even meet until the weddii^ and
sometimes weren't strongly attracted to each
other. Sometimes they preferred the cattfe. That's
why dating seems to be a tietter system.
Wtmr A n tldngs to do on a date
t) Go to a restauram and have sometlung to eat.
2) Go to a romantic tncw'ie.
3) Go to a restauram and tiave completely different things to eat.
4) Go to a mcvfe theater to see completely differetit movies.
Things you can talk about on a date
1) YMjr various emrees.
2) High sodium content of movfe theater
popcorn.
3) How romance in movies is nothing like it
used to be.
FUttng in love
When two peopfe tiave been on enough dates,
they generally-fell in love. \bu can tell you're in
love by die vny ^ m leel: your tiead becomes light,
your tieart l e ^ within you, you feel as If you're
walking on air and the whofe world seems like
a wonderful and happy place. Unlbftimaiely, these
are also the Ibur warning signs of colon disease,
so it's always a good klea to check with your
doctor.
I hope this guide is tielpful in sectiring a male
for you. Ifnot, I know it will be fim trying. Miss
Babetie is off on vacation to a Mediterranean
clinme this month. When I retum. 111 let you
know how this gukfe helped me. Umil tfaen...
je t*aime. Au revoir!
'^^.Wr:^t>-^ft''r>-\;.-.
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MARCH 1, 1988
NO. 190
pcrroc DPoauccDns
NEW YORK STATE'S OLDEST GAY NEWSPAPER
presents
The Eighteenth Crowning
''Miss G a y Rochester PageanV^
1988
S u n d a y evening,
Marvh ttventy-seventh
Nineteen Hwndred a n d Eighty Eight
at
Tite Rochester Riverside Convention Centre
LUac Ballroom
8:00 p.m.
Featuring
Miss Gay Rochester 1987
Lisa
unth
Speeded Appearances by
Miss Gay New York State Continental 1987-88
J o a n Aleods
and
VERY Speciat Appearance by
Miss Rochester 1977
MicheUe
First Prize
$500
Hosted by
Mn Robert Fbx
and
Ms. Rondretta Billingslea
Open B a r
Tickets $25.00
>l^
Tickets Available a t :
Thorruis Catone Hairdressers
Parldeigh P h a m u i c y
. ' . . W *
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